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turd ferguson

I Called In Sick Today

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Ronny you gotta have something to share. How’s the house looking? How’s the step son, he still living at home and giving you grief?

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I drank a lot this past week. My friends/landlord bought a boat over the winter so we’ve been taken it out almost every decent night and then we end up drinking a few beers, or my recent jam, Black Cherry Truly’s. Throw in the fourth and a few parties and friends from out of town and wow. Plus I had weddings and a birthday party the past few weekends. Out of control.

 

This weekend we were cleansing ourselves at “Big Island” on Lake Minnetonka. It’s a, wait for it, big island in the middle of the lake that has become the de facto place to anchor your boat and party. Talking multiple boats costing multiple hundreds of thousands just all tied up to each other with people going boat to boat to hang out and party. The actual fourth is when it’s super crazy and completely packed but this weekend there was still a ton of boats. If you google big island Minnetonka you’ll see a bunch of pictures.

 

Anyways, we were standing in the water playing catch and one of our friends dropped his sunglasses so we all tried to hurry up and form a search party but it was too late and we lost them to the super dirty and murky waters. They were cheap though so no big loss. Later, I was trying to dump my buddy from a lily pad and ended up knocking my $200 Per Sol’s into the water. Again we tried to find them but I had given up and just chalking it up to the game, I’d had them for years and been in multiple lakes, rivers and even the Pacific with them so I was due. But then a few minutes later randomly, the guy who lost his earlier somehow found them with his feet and I was made whole again.

 

I also decided this weekend I’m going to turn part of my 3 seasons porch into a workout area. I’ll use curtains and fans in the summer to cool it down and deaden the sound some and then in the winter I’ll use insulation board to cover the windows as well as comforters and a space heater to heat it up. Put the heater on a smart plug to preheat it for me and we’re good to go. I sincerely doubt I’ll use the porch for its intended purposes often and instead of paying $40/month for a gym membership I never use I might as well put that money towards gym equipment I’ll never use but can at least recoup some of the money when I sell.

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Trying to go through my* house room by room thinking of purchases that I'll need immediately to form a budget of sorts. Not looking good for the Kid. This has quickly got out of hand.

 

 

 

 

*still waiting for appraisal to come through for me please lord baby jesus let this house appraise for my offer price

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I'm rewatching Mad Men

 

HELL'S BELLS, TRUDY

 

 

Nobody's ever prepared for it but Peter somehow becomes a relatable and sympathetic figure during a second viewing.

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I’m worrying a lot about the appraisal but then I remember my friends who recently bought a house and offered like 20% over listing with the intention of negotiating it down after the inspection and then there weren’t any major issues and then they thought the appraisal might bail them out and then it appraised and that’s how they paid 20% more than they wanted.

 

But then I go back to “yeah, but this is a different area and Zillow recent sales isn’t super inspiring” and I start worrying again.

 

How am I feeling?

 

giphy.gif

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Nobody's ever prepared for it but Peter somehow becomes a relatable and sympathetic figure during a second viewing.

He does in the later seasons for sure. Season one is like, jesus I hope I don't come across as Pete's brand of ambitious.

 

I'm worrying a lot about the appraisal but then I remember my friends who recently bought a house and offered like 20% over listing with the intention of negotiating it down after the inspection and then there weren't any major issues and then they thought the appraisal might bail them out and then it appraised and that's how they paid 20% more than they wanted.

Fortunately the system is completely stupid. I will never forget my roommate's experience with refinancing. He needed his house to appraise at a certain number, so he'd have 20% equity to avoid PMI on the new note, and the appraisal came back at exactly his number. They will say how huge of a deal it is, that there is personal liability if they stretch the number at all, but the incentives are clear as day. You pay the guy $500, and within reason, he'll tell you what you want to hear.

 

Who referred you to the appraiser? If it was your mortgage guy, you can rest easy, he doesn't work with an appraiser that's willing to let integrity get in the way of closing the deal.

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I mean legally I probably had a choice to choose the appraiser but it certainly was not proposed to me as much. It was “tell us when to order the appraisal...ok...now here’s a link to the site to pay $535 for the appraisal. They won’t start until payment is confirmed, it shouldn’t take more than 2 weeks”

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Nobody's ever prepared for it but Peter somehow becomes a relatable and sympathetic figure during a second viewing.

 

Hi GWCGWC! Hope everything is well.

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I mean legally I probably had a choice to choose the appraiser but it certainly was not proposed to me as much. It was "tell us when to order the appraisal...ok...now here's a link to the site to pay $535 for the appraisal. They won't start until payment is confirmed, it shouldn't take more than 2 weeks"

 

They have a guy and the appraisal will miraculously be extremely close to your asking price.

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Brvy, you of all people should know that we don't really use retarded anymore, in any context.

 

For shame

 

I wasn't using it in vain as a throw-away insult. I legitimately thought he had mental retardation.

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I don’t remember worrying that much about my condo after the seller accepted. It wasn’t as much of a seller’s market though. I just remember having so much shit to coordinate during working hours to get the deal done, and then having no time outside of work, trying to buy and get everything set up. I’m reminding myself of why I want to stay in this crappy condo for a few more years.

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There’s so much that goes into buying a home that I’ve just never considered. Def staying in an apartment for now.

 

 

 

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Took the rest of the week off. Nothing to do, of course, but at least I’m not at the office. Probably get a hair cut today, and then to the casino. Maybe go to Best Buy, see what sweet stuff they got on display.

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Talked to my boss. She took our conversation to the CEO and then brought it up with leadership. Said something to the effect of, she hasn’t ever managed anyone like me, who makes $x and can still come away feeling like they’re getting screwed. Reading between the lines, she wanted to come back and say to me that I’m being ungrateful, but leadership’s conclusion was that they needed to give me clear indication on my career path with the firm.

 

Anyway, the number isn’t changing. It’s reassuring to know that it was solely my boss coming up with an arbitrary number, and not the full committee. But I’m getting screwed relative to my peers at the firm, and it has more to do with preserving profitability than it does judging value added, which is completely contrary to how comp works as explained by management.

 

The longer I feel this way, the more willing I am to give up $20-30k to hit the reset button and get back to working in investments at some other firm. I’m not getting any additional happiness from the money anyway.

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You can just give it to me if it’s not doing anything for you.

 

Obviously I’m hoping you come to a favorable resolution, one way or another. It sucks being miserable at work when you have to spend so much of your life there.

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The longer I feel this way, the more willing I am to give up $20-30k to hit the reset button and get back to working in investments at some other firm. I’m not getting any additional happiness from the money anyway.

 

this is becoming clearer to me over time. i'm not sure i can work in this industry for the rest of my life because most days i hate it. i'm not sure what else i can do, but i lie awake some nights thinking about quitting and playing poker full time, even though i know i could never actually do that. anything to get out of going into an office every day.

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That's for sure.

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what can i say, i just want others to suffer like me. heading up to play some poker this afternoon at the hollywood. hopefully my luck will change.

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They said my appraisal will be completed by end of business today and my mortgage processor says that could mean anywhere from 3-8 pm. If it’s low I will pursue legal action.

 

It taking all day wouldn’t be a big deal if I had literally anything else to do other than to sit her worrying it’s going to come in low. I’m working on projects that have been cancelled just in case they become un-cancelled.

 

Cc: my lawyer

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