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I Called In Sick Today


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If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

and after 3 days, he is risen!

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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Oh, yeah, about that.

 

Like twenty minutes after my little breakdown she texted me saying to ignore the email and that she just got us a hotel room in the closest town over and that she can't wait to see me and I made her apologize for sending the email in the first place, so, um, yeah.

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most elaborate "I'm gonna be nearby but don't want to meet up" ruse ever.

 

well played, nerpaldan.

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So, last night.

 

Went downtown with my roommate to meet up with a friend and drink some patio beers. My roommates not feeling the best so the plan is to just have a few beers and be able to drive home. Get there and I see one of my old frat bros (Sam) drinking alone so I go and hang out with him instead of my other friends.

 

We're sitting there and this dude next to me starts talking to us, which is fine. Turns out we all went to Iowa state and were all in frats and me and him grew up in the same area-ish. So I go back to talking to my buddy but this guy just leave us alone and keeps like interjecting into our conversation. Very annoying.

 

Well, this shitty live band starts playing outside so me and my buddy (Sam) move inside and join my roommate and other friend (John). Have a few drinks and then Sam has to go. And then my roommate decides to head home but it's still pretty early, 9 ish, I think, and I'm not done drinking so I stay and just plan on cabbing it back to Johns place with him.

 

About this time this new guy sitting next to me at the bar whom I've never met, Matt, asks me if I think this guy on the other end of the bar looks like Ron Livingston (he does) but I just vehemently disagree with him for fun. He's starting to get a little angry so I just tell him I'm fvcking with him, we have a good laugh, do some shots , etc. about this time my friend John decides he wants to go and I had just gotten a new drink so I say , hey sure just give me a few minutes to finish this drink. And he's like ok, and next thing I know he's gone. So now it's just me and my new friend Matt. Matts like, "Andrew...you see those two girls over there? Let's buy them drinks and go talk to them." One of then is very cute and one of them is kinda fat. Matt asks if I'm cool with the fat one and I'm like yup. So he buys them drinks and then the cute one comes over to talk to us and I realize she's the roommate of the bartender that works there. And she informs me that the fat ones husband just walked in, so I'm sol. Matt chats her up for a bit and then she shuts him down and leaves us.

 

So then Matt has this great idea to go to the country bar to find some fat chicks and who am I to disagree? While walking there we see two kinda chubby girls walking ahead of us and he's like "fvcking go talk to them. ask them to come to the bar with us and we'll buy them a round. Just do it". So I do, and they decline.

 

Get to the bar. Approach two different tables of cute girls and get immediately shot down. I head to the bathroom real quick and I come back and Matt is straight up making out with a chubby chick in the middle of the bar. I try talking to her friends who also shut me down. And then I just leave and get a cab home because it was late and I was alone and whatever.

 

I'm sure it sounds lame but it was a lot of fun just doing whatever.

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Sorry Hanky. If it's any consolation it's nowhere near Omaha. The wedding is like 30 minutes south east of Omaha and the place were staying is like another 20 minutes east of that.

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The desire to curtail, prohibit or thwart people from engaging or fulfilling their good desires is immoral and just wrong.

 

 

See shake, validation for your rape hobby.

 

Sigh. Let's just stick with this problem before you change topics. Given that blacks were pidgeon-holed in communities and denied opportunities for centuries that have led to lasting problems, perhaps we should feel some obligation to make reparations, pay back what was stolen and denied them by spending some extra to improve the situation, e.g, improved schools that have been systematically poor. A higher EI tax credit.

 

LOL "let's just throw money at the problem and give them even MORE of a tax refund that they never paid into in the first place." Brilliant.

 

Oh, yeah, about that.

 

Like twenty minutes after my little breakdown she texted me saying to ignore the email and that she just got us a hotel room in the closest town over and that she can't wait to see me and I made her apologize for sending the email in the first place, so, um, yeah.

 

You mean the breakdown here, right? Tell me you didn't breakdown in front of/to her?

 

Either way, bring condoms. Poke a hole in each of them first. Serves her right.

 

Sorry Hanky. If it's any consolation it's nowhere near Omaha. The wedding is like 30 minutes south east of Omaha and the place were staying is like another 20 minutes east of that.

 

50 minutes is "nowhere near"??? Wow. You guys really would shit yourselves if you lived in the West.

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Heh. Yeah, I realize that. The last two days, for some reason (colleges starting to let out?), it took me only 40 minutes to go the 40 miles to work. I was ecstatic since the same drive normally takes an hour. I would think nothing of driving an hour to hang out with a buddy, go see family etc...

 

BTW, good on you for getting in the game last night. You can't win if you don't play.

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But the failures though. <<shudder>>

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Morality is about how you should act, or should want to act. No one is saying, or should say that a person with physical or mental defects should compete with more biologically fortunate people. No one is saying they are equal physically. No one should say that they should have an equal opportunity to compete in such contests, e.g. No one is saying golf handicaps should be banned.

 

It is about equal opportunity. It is about promoting good desires and inhibiting bad desires. The desire to curtail, prohibit or thwart people from engaging or fulfilling their good desires is immoral and just wrong.

Sigh. Let's just stick with this problem before you change topics. Given that blacks were pidgeon-holed in communities and denied opportunities for centuries that have led to lasting problems, perhaps we should feel some obligation to make reparations, pay back what was stolen and denied them by spending some extra to improve the situation, e.g, improved schools that have been systematically poor. A higher EI tax credit.

 

 

I was with you... and then I wasn't.

 

More money won't solve the problem. It almost never does. It will just be flushed down the toilet. In fact, it can probably only make things worse, unless you're purposing that we spend like trillions of dollars. Then just most of it will be wasted, but it's possible something might improve in the short term.

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Nappy, good on you for firing away last night. Nobody gets a hit without swinging the bat.

 

Next time, if the vibe is right, or if its not, when two girls turn down your friendly offer of a drink, say something like "oh, i'm sorry, I didnt realize you two were on a date tonight, my bad. Congrats on being able to legally get married now."

 

Or, "ok, cool. You're the first two ladies I've met that hate laughing and free drinks. Have a great night"

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those are ok but I usually go with the "WHATEVER YOU'RE AN UGLY BITCH ANYWAYS FUCK YOU"

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those are ok but I usually go with the "WHATEVER YOU'RE AN UGLY BITCH ANYWAYS FUCK YOU"

 

they don't call him "the ladykiller" for nothin folks.

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Yes, he's literally killed a few "ladies"

 

Especially the ones with a little extra equipment. After he finishes, of course

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Nappy, good on you for firing away last night. Nobody gets a hit without swinging the bat.

 

Next time, if the vibe is right, or if its not, when two girls turn down your friendly offer of a drink, say something like "oh, i'm sorry, I didnt realize you two were on a date tonight, my bad. Congrats on being able to legally get married now."

 

Or, "ok, cool. You're the first two ladies I've met that hate laughing and free drinks. Have a great night"

 

The first one is pretty straight up mean, but I like the 2nd one a lot.

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Really? Mean? Maybe you're right. We used to love saying "oh sorrrrrry, I didnt know this was a lesbian bar". Depends on the level of drunkeness

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Everyone knows how much of each party's values have changed over time.

 

Oh, I completely agree. The point I was making was even with this being true, if it was a Republican, it would have been mentioned, bolded, and in a larger font. Because it wasn't mentioned, he's able to just say, "Well, the party's have changed over time". Once the article is written, it's ideas are part of society.

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Oh, I completely agree. The point I was making was even with this being true, if it was a Republican, it would have been mentioned, bolded, and in a larger font. Because it wasn't mentioned, he's able to just say, "Well, the party's have changed over time". Once the article is written, it's ideas are part of society.

 

Hey, I get that Repbulicans are taking a lot of crap for promoting racism, sexism and homophobia on a daily basis and that they are constantly whining about people pointing it out. But you seem to be 2nd leveling that thought for some reason.

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So, last night.

 

Went downtown with my roommate to meet up with a friend and drink some patio beers. My roommates not feeling the best so the plan is to just have a few beers and be able to drive home. Get there and I see one of my old frat bros (Sam) drinking alone so I go and hang out with him instead of my other friends.

 

We're sitting there and this dude next to me starts talking to us, which is fine. Turns out we all went to Iowa state and were all in frats and me and him grew up in the same area-ish. So I go back to talking to my buddy but this guy just leave us alone and keeps like interjecting into our conversation. Very annoying.

 

Well, this shitty live band starts playing outside so me and my buddy (Sam) move inside and join my roommate and other friend (John). Have a few drinks and then Sam has to go. And then my roommate decides to head home but it's still pretty early, 9 ish, I think, and I'm not done drinking so I stay and just plan on cabbing it back to Johns place with him.

 

About this time this new guy sitting next to me at the bar whom I've never met, Matt, asks me if I think this guy on the other end of the bar looks like Ron Livingston (he does) but I just vehemently disagree with him for fun. He's starting to get a little angry so I just tell him I'm fvcking with him, we have a good laugh, do some shots , etc. about this time my friend John decides he wants to go and I had just gotten a new drink so I say , hey sure just give me a few minutes to finish this drink. And he's like ok, and next thing I know he's gone. So now it's just me and my new friend Matt. Matts like, "Andrew...you see those two girls over there? Let's buy them drinks and go talk to them." One of then is very cute and one of them is kinda fat. Matt asks if I'm cool with the fat one and I'm like yup. So he buys them drinks and then the cute one comes over to talk to us and I realize she's the roommate of the bartender that works there. And she informs me that the fat ones husband just walked in, so I'm sol. Matt chats her up for a bit and then she shuts him down and leaves us.

 

So then Matt has this great idea to go to the country bar to find some fat chicks and who am I to disagree? While walking there we see two kinda chubby girls walking ahead of us and he's like "fvcking go talk to them. ask them to come to the bar with us and we'll buy them a round. Just do it". So I do, and they decline.

 

Get to the bar. Approach two different tables of cute girls and get immediately shot down. I head to the bathroom real quick and I come back and Matt is straight up making out with a chubby chick in the middle of the bar. I try talking to her friends who also shut me down. And then I just leave and get a cab home because it was late and I was alone and whatever.

 

I'm sure it sounds lame but it was a lot of fun just doing whatever.

 

Dude, you should be pumped up. After all that rejection the odds of that happening another night just got slimmer.. Um poor choice of words but whatever. Keep asking and as you math geeks know, the law of averages play to your favor.

 

On 2nd thought, you need to attend the Randy school of pick up lines and one night stands (with sex). Your approach needs work.

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Sigh. Let's just stick with this problem before you change topics. Given that blacks were pidgeon-holed in communities and denied opportunities for centuries that have led to lasting problems, perhaps we should feel some obligation to make reparations, pay back what was stolen and denied them by spending some extra to improve the situation, e.g, improved schools that have been systematically poor. A higher EI tax credit.

 

It's not changing the topic.

It's cross-applying your own implication and seeing if it works elsewhere. Since it doesn't (unless you seriously are advocating that Chinese Americans be given reparations checks), it begs the question, why just for blacks?

 

Also, amusing how nobody ever bothers to stop and examine the assumption that blacks must be 'given opportunities' while with any other group, the assumption is they will create it on their own... because they can... because their average IQ isn't 85.

 

When you examine this same question over the arc of human history, it gets even uglier for people of sub-Saharan descent.

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so i'm watching the big ten baseball championship because nebraska made it. nebraska is the 2 seed, so they are the away team. lead off guy draws a walk and first pitch to the 2 hitter they lay down a bunt right to the pitcher who turns and fires to second for the out.

 

it's sad that in 2014 people still think that is effective strategy. it makes baseball hard to watch sometimes.

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