Jump to content

I Called In Sick Today


Recommended Posts

  • Replies 268k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • Ron_Mexico

    19414

  • speedz99

    16304

  • Napa Lite

    7767

  • ShakeZuma

    7517

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Posts

and after 3 days, he is risen!

If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

Posted Images

I worked, then worked around the house, then got into the pool. Then made some burgers. I'm now being incredibly lazy. My left heel is on fire. I'm assuming its a pretty inflamed case of plantar fasciitis. I mean, 5 sugeriies on the right knee, microfracture surgery on the left, crappy back, and now this on my left heel. If I sit for a while and then stand up, especially when the heel is agitated, I look like an 80 year old person that is creaky.

 

I hurt. I need some HGH.

 

And adderall.

 

And to lose weight, obv. The first two can help with that.

 

Where is beans and shake?

 

Looks like I may go sober through this entire weekend. That doesn't happen a lot since I moved up here

Link to post
Share on other sites

After work I came home and cleaned the place. After that I've just been laying on the couch listening to music and drinking. Just turned on the royals/red sox game so I'd have something to look at. What a waste of a day. Just have had no motivation to do anything. Probably doesnt help I got like 3 hours of sleep last night.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Since we're sharing...

 

Went with the girl and her kid to the zoo and had a wonderful time. Facebook friends can see her on my latest vine. Now's she home and just discovered snapchat. She's drinking and sending me pics/vids. Tomorrow, she's cooking for me. Things are prittay, prittay good.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I like bikinis.

you just like the way all the boys look at you when you have one on. slut.

 

Probably doesnt help I got like 3 hours of sleep last night.

 

ok, we get it. you got some kissy face from a girl last night. no need to lord it over the rest of us losers. geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesh.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I got sidetracked on FB and forgot to watch the Vine. Actually, I saw a child, skipped it. Who am I kidding, I only check to see if anyone is talking about me.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Nice.

 

 

Tough to turn off Goodfellas but its time for bed. Sooooo many good lines.

 

Ya studderin prickya

He's treatin me like I'm some kinda half a fag

 

That was in the last 5 minutes

Link to post
Share on other sites

Welp, decided to abandon the ship and make my own way home. Currently lining up a ferry trip home in a week or so.....

 

 

 

Imagine a buzzed southern drawl making a deal to fly a four two one back to the states with someone that speaks not a smidgen of english

 

 

 

 

...and smoking a joint that chong would roll

 

 

 

I think I'm in hondouras

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites

Welp, decided to abandon the ship and make my own way home. Currently lining up a ferry trip home in a week or so.....

 

 

 

Imagine a buzzed southern drawl making a deal to fly a four two one back to the states with someone that speaks not a smidgen of english

 

 

 

 

...and smoking a joint that chong would roll

 

 

 

I think I'm in hondouras

 

Well, enough said about that, I believe.

Link to post
Share on other sites

If Ouch is saying that Beans should tell that story again with a touch more elaboration, then I agree with him. Ridiculous.

 

If Ouch is saying we shouldn't talk more about it at all, because Beans is about to be arrested on international terrorism and/or drug smuggling charges, then I agree with him also.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Sometimes they do that. I just keep hitting reload until it works.

 

No luck. I refreshed it 42 times and nothing happened. I have adblocker disabled on vine, but I'm guessing it's still blocking it somehow.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Sometimes if I'm having trouble with something like that I'll, gulp, open it in IE and it usually works.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Not worth it.

 

ps. That's a rip on IE, not Joel's smokin' hot lady. PLUS, tilt, I had already seen it in Chrome, so why in the world would you suggest using Internet Explorer? Idiot.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I dont give a fck enough about anything Funyet does to try that hard to view it. Unless he makes a guy/girl porn. Then I'm in.

 

Sobriety over. Drank 2 Double Gulp cups full of whipped vodka and crystal light plus a 1 pint 6oz Shipyard Smashed Blueberry bottle, 9% ABV

 

null_zpsd40c9976.jpg

Link to post
Share on other sites

Man, I got really really drunk last night at my friends daughters bday party. We were up playing horse on his court in his backyard until 1:00. I puked when we got home, I can't even remember the last time i puked. It wasn't like a ton of puking, it was more like my stomach was churning from riding in the car than full out drunk puking, but it was puking none the less.

 

I had to go pick up my son from basketball and grabbed a handle of sailor jerry and a 750 of malibu. Between 5 guys we polished it off.

 

This one guy who was there I didn't know very well and he was complaining about his wife and his life and it was very uncomfortable. She was like 10 feet away and he kept whispering, but not very quietly when he wouldnt want her to hear something. He openly talked about getting bombed and riding his bike around trying to find a party with a bunch of college girls. Dude is over 40 years old.

 

Oh, and I was so drunk I lost badly in horse, I couldn't even shoot by the end of the second game. Like missing by 5 feet short on a free throw drunk.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

Announcements


×
×
  • Create New...