I Called In Sick Today

[ShakeZuma 585]

I like the color

 

racist.

 

Are you drunk yet? Mowing yet? Drunk mowing?

 

just got in. got about 1/2 of it done but it's getting dark. that's not really a problem but it's also getting chilly, strangely enough. I had on a long sleeve shirt and I was still getting cold. but yeah, drank me a few. it was pretty enjoyable. now I'm gonna watch me some ax men.

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

You live and odd existence my friend

[Theraflu 1,035]

ugh, celtics

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

You're telling me buddy. I hate the Celtics AND the Knicks. I just want everyone to lose

[InternetExplorer 2,609]

someone with the username "SpoilerToTheKnee" randomly PM'd all of my subreddit's moderators with the big events from book three of game of thrones. I laughed really hard.

[Iphonenkinder 558]

Gonna hit the casino tonight. anyone else have weekend plans they wanna share?

I'm out of another work subsidized Happy Hour, to be followed by an evening with friends watching Marc Maron.

 

Chores tomorrow followed by a screening of On the Waterfront. I've never seen it, and there's a big screen showing, so I'm looking forward.

 

Iron Man 3 on Sunday, and then I have to go to work in the afternoon. Blammo! Feels like my weekend is over before it starts.

[ShakeZuma 585]

will you marry me? I hope you're not ugly. but still, I'll marry you.

 

 

 

I'm pretty sure strat doesn't even know what strat is talking about.

[Tiltinagain 973]

Nsfbrvy

 

For shake, tg and maybe tilty. Is this over the top? I'm of 2 minds on this one

 

 

 

 

Seeeee? I know my audience

 

Edit: tilty wont like it but I mentioned him because he was on a butt search for shake a while back

 

You do indeed know your audience. WAY too much flab on that dumper.

 

Well a newish thing is dumping a mexican beer into a margarita, so I think thats it

 

Right. And by having the bottle partially submerged like that the beer will flow in while you drink rather than pouring it in all at once.

 

 

will you marry me? I hope you're not ugly. but still, I'll marry you.

 

 

 

I'm pretty sure strat doesn't even know what strat is talking about.

 

For some reason I imagine her quite un-ugly. Not that it's stopped you before.

 

And, when did we start having to point out every time strat doesn't know what he's talking about?

 

I mean, that would be a lot of redundant quoting if that were a thing.

[NickCave 194]

Do you have room for a new contributor? I could lie and say something like, "I've been lurking for a while and finally got the" whatever, but that would be a lie. I clicked a link to get to this forum a few weeks ago, accidentally came into off-topic, and, whilst drunk, opened this thread. I read a few posts, skipped back a few pages, eventually years, and I thought to myself, "What are you doing? Why are you reading posts from 2006 in the off-topic portion of Daniel Negreanu's forum?"

 

Then I thought, "Ha." Never "haha," because **** you. But "ha," for sure. Anyway, "ha," and "can I join do I have to fill out an app or something?"

[NickCave 194]

Things about me selected at random

 

- My favorite song is

It is an ode to the fictional character Daniel LaRusso from "The Karate Kid" films.

 

- Last night, I drank 9 wine coolers in 30 minutes on a bet. I subsequently vomited. I won $11, which was less than the cost of the wine coolers. I still believe I won.

 

- I am secretly hoping, beyond all hope, that the previous item will impress someone.

 

- I spent 15m trying to figure out what I was missing re: ShakeZuma (as a name, as a thing in itself). Most google results led me here, or somewhere way creepier.

 

- I live a very boring life. I run a floor, basically as a brush, in a poker room, I drink too much, and I have had other random shitty jobs that are pretty funny

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

Do you strike out with women? If so, you'll do well here.

[Quacktastic 106]

Went bowling for the first time in about 2 years yesterday. Bowled over 200 2 out of 3 games with a house ball. Quack 1, Life 100.

 

Today I have a laundry list of honey-do's to take care of while drinking beers and gambling on the Kentucky Derby races.

[NickCave 194]

Do you strike out with women? If so, you'll do well here.

 

Hell no I get mad bitches. I've banged like 1400 super hot chicks and I ride a motorcycle and I have a moustache and my dick is huge and I'm not even barely gay.

[ShakeZuma 585]

trying to figure out what I was missing re: ShakeZuma (as a name, as a thing in itself).

 

trust me you're not missing anything

 

 

 

man god damn it all, I went to a friends house yesterday evening after I stopped cutting grass, had a few more beers, got home at like 11, went to bed at 11:30, and damn if I didn't wake up at 4:30 on the sonofabitchin nose. extra tired, add alcohol, all the time in the world to sleep in, and still: shit. pure shit.

 

 

ironically to my last sentence I was farting up a storm this morning too. man alive if my room had been much smaller I would have asphixiated.

[ShakeZuma 585]

I'm not even barely gay.

 

gtfo

[NickCave 194]

gtfo

 

*grabs junk, pounds chest and winks*

 

Represent heterosexuals yo.

 

*dresses up as shirtless construction worker for good measure*

[brvheart 1,752]

Well a newish thing is dumping a mexican beer into a margarita, so I think thats it

 

I can't imagine a worse thing. I would need to be actively receiving torture to drink that crap.

 

I'm out of another work subsidized Happy Hour, to be followed by an evening with friends watching Marc Maron.

 

Chores tomorrow followed by a screening of On the Waterfront. I've never seen it, and there's a big screen showing, so I'm looking forward.

 

Iron Man 3 on Sunday, and then I have to go to work in the afternoon. Blammo! Feels like my weekend is over before it starts.

 

Oh man. I don't know why, but when I read this post I thought it was Napa. I read it twice with a weird look on my face, and I have to be honest... I was worried.

 

And by having the bottle partially submerged like that the beer will flow in while you drink rather than pouring it in all at once.

 

You're so dumb, Whiskers. I can't believe you couldn't figure this out from the picture!

 

Do you have room for a new contributor? I could lie and say something like, "I've been lurking for a while and finally got the" whatever, but that would be a lie. I clicked a link to get to this forum a few weeks ago, accidentally came into off-topic, and, whilst drunk, opened this thread. I read a few posts, skipped back a few pages, eventually years, and I thought to myself, "What are you doing? Why are you reading posts from 2006 in the off-topic portion of Daniel Negreanu's forum?"

 

Then I thought, "Ha." Never "haha," because **** you. But "ha," for sure. Anyway, "ha," and "can I join do I have to fill out an app or something?"

 

Um, you're hired.

[Napa Lite 3,278]

"No new ni**as, ni**a we don't feel that"

 

 

So the past few times I've been up here in the cities I've stayed at my friends place and he has like 3-4 roommates (decent sized house) and then there's a few other friends that always end up going out with us and I know exactly none of their names. And I've met them far to many times to not have it be super awkward to ask them what their names are. One of them is named Tim, but fu*k if I know which one.

[ShakeZuma 585]

it's too bad your friend doesn't know their names either.

 

 

 

ooooh my god I was sooo close to dropping $700+ on a chainsaw just now. 362 stihl. thing's a hoss. about 6 pounds lighter than my current saw. jesus I want that thing. but of all the shit I waste my money on that I don't need, that would have to top the list. I don't even have a wood stove. but shit, that thing was sweet.

[brvheart 1,752]

Beans. Thoughts on this mower or something similar:

 

http://racine.craigslist.org/grd/3742212819.html

 

 

What should I be paying for it? Should I be concerned about that rusted part? What should I be looking for?

 

I would like a commercial or similar sized walk-behind, but rider is ok. I don't want to spend more than 2k.

[Napa Lite 3,278]

Like this girl that just woke up. (She slept on a couch in the same living room I did, not with me) No idea what her name is. She told me like 5 times last night. I might be retarded.

[brvheart 1,752]

ooooh my god I was sooo close to dropping $700+ on a chainsaw just now. 362 stihl. thing's a hoss. about 6 pounds lighter than my current saw. jesus I want that thing. but of all the shit I waste my money on that I don't need, that would have to top the list. I don't even have a wood stove. but shit, that thing was sweet.

 

Wood stoves are amazing. You should buy one, asap. My biggest problem is how much wood I burn through.

 

I love my 20" 291. Do it Shake, you definitely need a better chainsaw. The neighbors are laughing at you.

[ShakeZuma 585]

jesus christ brv they probably are.

 

 

we used to have a wood stove in this house. chimney's still functional I guess but I'd definitely have to have it cleaned out and what not. probably wouldn't be a terrible idea really, especially since I actually like cutting and splitting wood. though I'd almost definitely burn the house down, so there is that downside.

 

I've got an hour and 45 minutes to decide. they close at noon. fuck me in the goat ass.

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

Napa, you HAVE to call this girl by the wrong name, and when she corrects you, use a dofferent name again 10 minutes later

 

If she calls you on it, depending on her tone, either tell her that its just not important enough or you to remember OR that you were in an accident in high school, a sports accident, that caused you to lose some short term memory ability.

 

Dont use that Love and Other Drugs trick and keep calling her the same wrong name because you dated a girl that looked like her. Women like Gyllenhall and might catch you in your bullshit

[brvheart 1,752]

jesus christ brv they probably are.

 

 

we used to have a wood stove in this house. chimney's still functional I guess but I'd definitely have to have it cleaned out and what not. probably wouldn't be a terrible idea really, especially since I actually like cutting and splitting wood. though I'd almost definitely burn the house down, so there is that downside.

 

I've got an hour and 45 minutes to decide. they close at noon. fuck me in the goat ass.

 

Um yes, you should definitely get a chimney sweep to come once a year. It's only like $60 here. Of course, I'm sure Beans has an easy way to clean it that involved drinking and just quickly disassembling your chimney.

 

However, if you don't get a chimney sweep and you do burn your house down... INSURANCE MONEY!