hank213 1,823 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 No, yours was a very slight humble brag and mine was a joke at Shakes, and to a lesser extent my own, expense as you probably tipped the valet an amount equal to my last paycheck, and so it's a brag akin to the ole "that's like winning a gold medal at the special olympics" analogy. Glad I had to explain this, too. Because that makes it super funny. Also, still less than three you. Unrelated, last week I ended up having drinks with my buddy's older sister, brother-in-law and another couple last week that really made me hate myself. They (aside from my buddy) are in their lower 30's and were bragging about their new jobs at the "most prestigious law firm in Des Moines" and "as a new writer with Fox Sports" and "oh we were at Lollapolooza" and "a mutual acquaintance of ours played a rock show on our old buildings roof after our wedding" and I felt so inadequate. "Oh, how chic of you to be on the rooftop of your Des Moines, IOWA apartment building thats probably six stories high. Last week I drink the majority of a twelve pack of light beer out of the cutoff end of a whiffle bat, how's that for cultured, bitches"thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
ShakeZuma 585 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 also nobody ever answered me on whether or not it's a good idea to bring up market salaries for similar positions when bargaining for a raise. Link to post Share on other sites
brvheart 1,752 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 also nobody ever answered me on whether or not it's a good idea to bring up market salaries for similar positions when bargaining for a raise.I think it's a fantastic idea. Also, try to use the f-word frequently. Link to post Share on other sites
brvheart 1,752 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I just finished my missing Sunny episode, and it was super great. I'm not really sure how a 6-8 year old had the catch phase stuck in his head though, since that episode was probably one of the more un-kid-friendly episodes that I've ever seen. Link to post Share on other sites
Sickinfo2 291 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I mean, you're still pissing on his grave though, right?Well, of course I am....I only get a conscience or have normal thoughts/feelings when im completely hammeredAs far as buzzed beans is concerned, the sorry **** can rot in ****in hell and smoke a turd with the devilI may even shit....In other news...I have no idea Link to post Share on other sites
Tiltinagain 973 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Valet?? At Embassy Suites??? Someone has to get the fuck out of Iowa for christ sake. Link to post Share on other sites
Tactical Bear 3 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Deadspin: Youth-Baseball Umpire In Missouri Claims Pitcher, Catcher Conspired To Hit Him With A PitchFirst off, the usual caveats with respect to my not posting here anymore, etc.Secondly: We used to do this all the time in Kansas City. My best friend in middle school was originally from Lee's Summit -- where this story takes place -- but he never played baseball. Meanwhile, every school-sponsored team I've ever played on -- starting about 20 minutes from Lee's Summit -- used this play. We were better at it than those guys, sure, but we used it at least once a year. I've been in every one of these spots: pitcher, catcher... ump. (I swear that 9-year old dove out of the way at the last second.) Link to post Share on other sites
Roll the Bones 74 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 No, yours was a very slight humble brag and mine was a joke at Shakes, and to a lesser extent my own, expense as you probably tipped the valet an amount equal to my last paycheck, and so it's a brag akin to the ole "that's like winning a gold medal at the special olympics" analogy. Glad I had to explain this, too. Because that makes it super funny. Also, still less than three you. Unrelated, last week I ended up having drinks with my buddy's older sister, brother-in-law and another couple last week that really made me hate myself. They (aside from my buddy) are in their lower 30's and were bragging about their new jobs at the "most prestigious law firm in Des Moines" and "as a new writer with Fox Sports" and "oh we were at Lollapolooza" and "a mutual acquaintance of ours played a rock show on our old buildings roof after our wedding" and I felt so inadequate. "Oh, how chic of you to be on the rooftop of your Des Moines, IOWA apartment building thats probably six stories high. Last week I drink the majority of a twelve pack of light beer out of the cutoff end of a whiffle bat, how's that for cultured, bitches"Please, please tell us that you mentioned how much fun it is to pick shrooms off of manure and go cow-tipping afterwards.also nobody ever answered me on whether or not it's a good idea to bring up market salaries for similar positions when bargaining for a raise.Oh sorry, I thought you were kidding about the raise thing. Uhh, yeah sure, mention the market. Link to post Share on other sites
Roll the Bones 74 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Deadspin: Youth-Baseball Umpire In Missouri Claims Pitcher, Catcher Conspired To Hit Him With A PitchFirst off, the usual caveats with respect to my not posting here anymore, etc.Secondly: We used to do this all the time in Kansas City. My best friend in middle school was originally from Lee's Summit -- where this story takes place -- but he never played baseball. Meanwhile, every school-sponsored team I've ever played on -- starting about 20 minutes from Lee's Summit -- used this play. We were better at it than those guys, sure, but we used it at least once a year. I've been in every one of these spots: pitcher, catcher... ump. (I swear that 9-year old dove out of the way at the last second.)I've probably told the story (quite few times) of witnessing my sons team do this exact thing in the greatest baseball game never seen. They called the umpire Bad Back Bart becuase due to his bad back he couldn't lean over to see the strike zone. The the team was losing so bad and were so vastly overmatched (Think Jamacian Bobsled team) that they ended up just having fun, which included trying to hit the umpire in the nuts with a pitch, and succeeding. Amazing, hilarious and one of those moments that seem to justify your brief but amazing stint on this planet. Link to post Share on other sites
speedz99 145 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Unrelated, last week I ended up having drinks with my buddy's older sister, brother-in-law and another couple last week that really made me hate myself. They (aside from my buddy) are in their lower 30's and were bragging about their new jobs at the "most prestigious law firm in Des Moines" and "as a new writer with Fox Sports" and "oh we were at Lollapolooza" and "a mutual acquaintance of ours played a rock show on our old buildings roof after our wedding" and I felt so inadequate. "Oh, how chic of you to be on the rooftop of your Des Moines, IOWA apartment building thats probably six stories high. Last week I drink the majority of a twelve pack of light beer out of the cutoff end of a whiffle bat, how's that for cultured, bitches"They're 10 years older than you, they should be more accomplished. Sorry Shake.also nobody ever answered me on whether or not it's a good idea to bring up market salaries for similar positions when bargaining for a raise.Yes, definitely. Link to post Share on other sites
iZuma 764 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 great, my review is in ten minutes and I have no idea if I should, and how I should ask for a raise. you guys and your conflicting/possibly missleading advice. I hate you all! except maybe you speedz, unless you were being facetious. Link to post Share on other sites
CindyLou 11 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 great, my review is in ten minutes and I have no idea if I should, and how I should ask for a raise. you guys and your conflicting/possibly missleading advice. I hate you all! except maybe you speedz, unless you were being facetious.Bringing up market salaries won't accomplish anything.Edit: It's hard to really give any advice when nobody knows what you do or how big the company you work for is or actually any useful information. Link to post Share on other sites
El Guapo 8 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Tell them how many baby's mommas kids you have to feed. Link to post Share on other sites
Roll the Bones 74 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Did I show you guys my pole? Not that one, this one. Link to post Share on other sites
speedz99 145 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 great, my review is in ten minutes and I have no idea if I should, and how I should ask for a raise. you guys and your conflicting/possibly missleading advice. I hate you all! except maybe you speedz, unless you were being facetious.I was not. It's perfectly reasonable for you to mention the fact that you're being underpaid compared to similar positions at different companies. But maybe I'd save that until the end if it looks like they aren't planning on giving you a raise. Link to post Share on other sites
iZuma 764 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 yeah too late. on the bright side, maybe sal paradise will be making a return! Link to post Share on other sites
loogie 115 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 My job just got a whole lot easier. Link to post Share on other sites
speedz99 145 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 yeah too late. on the bright side, maybe sal paradise will be making a return!I don't get it. JJJ, explain this to me. Link to post Share on other sites
iZuma 764 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 sal pardise is the sad sack job hating iteration of me. although I don't actually hate my job, I'm just fucking poor. Link to post Share on other sites
CindyLou 11 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I don't get it. JJJ, explain this to me. Link to post Share on other sites
speedz99 145 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I don't understand why JJJ has to be in hibernation. Link to post Share on other sites
CindyLou 11 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I don't understand why JJJ has to be in hibernation. Link to post Share on other sites
brvheart 1,752 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I don't see Iowa on there. Link to post Share on other sites
El Guapo 8 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I don't think all those signs are pointing in the correct direction. Link to post Share on other sites
brvheart 1,752 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I don't know who Cindy is, but she just burned Speedz real good.Also, I don't like Cindy's new avatar, but maybe it's just because the old one was much better. Link to post Share on other sites
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