I Called In Sick Today

[JoeyJoJo 18]

Look, I'm sorry, but I'm really excited that my cats are getting along so well...I've never had two before. I promise this is the last picture for a while.

Is that normal for cats?

[speedz99 145]

Is that normal for cats?

I think so. I mean, I don't think it's abnormal necessarily. But I don't care either way...whatever floats their boats is fine with me as long as it doesn't involve stealing my food or keeping me awake at night.

[loogie 115]

Look, I'm sorry, but I'm really excited that my cats are getting along so well...I've never had two before. I promise this is the last picture for a while.

I've wanted a cat for a long time now but never felt like I've been in the right situation. Like now, I have a room in a house, but I lock it when I'm away, which is often. I would want the cat to be able to roam around the house and do cat things while I'm gone. But I'm just so lonely. So very lonely. And yet scared of people stealing my shit. Yet lonely.Perhaps a chain lock?Also, I don't think there's room in my bathroom for a litter box.Meanwhile, one of my new roommates has two cages set up in the hallway, each one containing a rabbit. F'ing rabbits? What is the point of owning a rabbit? And the really weird thing is that I have yet to see either of them sleeping. They just sit in their cages chewing cardboard and looking nervous.EDIT - I just realized that you can't chain lock a door and leave.

[JubilantLankyLad 1,957]

I've wanted a cat for a long time now but never felt like I've been in the right situation. Like now, I have a room in a house, but I lock it when I'm away, which is often. I would want the cat to be able to roam around the house and do cat things while I'm gone. But I'm just so lonely. So very lonely. And yet scared of people stealing my shit. Yet lonely.Perhaps a chain lock?Also, I don't think there's room in my bathroom for a litter box.Meanwhile, one of my new roommates has two cages set up in the hallway, each one containing a rabbit. F'ing rabbits? What is the point of owning a rabbit? And the really weird thing is that I have yet to see either of them sleeping. They just sit in their cages chewing cardboard and looking nervous.EDIT - I just realized that you can't chain lock a door and leave.

sounds like you need a trained cat

[loogie 115]

sounds like you need a trained cat

Trained to lock the door behind him, yes.

[Sal Paradise 57]

Is that normal for cats?

they're speedz's.

[Randy Reed 0]

I've wanted a cat for a long time now but never felt like I've been in the right situation. Like now, I have a room in a house, but I lock it when I'm away, which is often. I would want the cat to be able to roam around the house and do cat things while I'm gone. But I'm just so lonely. So very lonely. And yet scared of people stealing my shit. Yet lonely.Perhaps a chain lock?Also, I don't think there's room in my bathroom for a litter box.Meanwhile, one of my new roommates has two cages set up in the hallway, each one containing a rabbit. F'ing rabbits? What is the point of owning a rabbit? And the really weird thing is that I have yet to see either of them sleeping. They just sit in their cages chewing cardboard and looking nervous.EDIT - I just realized that you can't chain lock a door and leave.

Well, one lonely night I can give you a good rabbit recipe.

they're speedz's.

Touchdown!It's actually pretty normal for young ones to snuggle up. Cats love to be near body heat and will pretty much snuggle up on anything they can, butSpeedz, that is damn cute. I'd show Deb but it will just reinforce her quest for a kitten and kill my dog chances.

[JubilantLankyLad 1,957]

Trained to lock the door behind him, yes.

oh- rodreynolds

[speedz99 145]

loog, you could carve a cat door into your door. You know, a flap big enough for a cat but too small for a human being. A door, but just for cats. A cat door.

[Theraflu 1,035]

loog, you could carve a cat door into your door. You know, a flap big enough for a cat but too small for a human being. A door, but just for cats. A cat door.

But what if the rabbits found it?

[speedz99 145]

But what if the rabbits found it?

They'd be too nervous to go in. For christ's sake, the guy knew David Carradine...that's intimidating for any lagomorpha.

[Sickinfo2 291]

gave a good pump.....worked fine for a couple hours, then went back to crappy.

Sounds exactly like the method my wife used on me during my construction of her flower garden....

Wyatt Earp – defining characteristics: fearless, loyal, a leader (speedz)Doc Holliday - defining characteristics: loyal and deadly (beans)Virgil Earp – defining characteristics: a little older, wants to do what is right (Ron)Morgan Earp - defining characteristics: a follower, but useful (El Guapo)Curly Bill - defining characteristics: pretends to be a leader, but needs Ringo around to be a real threat (JJJ)Johnny Ringo - defining characteristics: deadly and has no filter (Wang)Sheriff John Behan - defining characteristics: likes to think he’s important, but doesn’t really want to be involved (mk)Marshall Fred - defining characteristics: wants to be the man but knows he’s out of his league (Napa)Johnny Tyler - defining characteristics: surly, a little dumb, and ultimately a coward (SBriand)Hmm, maybe I should remove the defining characteristics on some of those.

Yeah, wang was right.... the drinking connection cinches itIm flattered by my character choice as well as amused by the others.... In other news, I made a scene at the local Lowes this afternoon....(Beans checks out at register and is handed a receipt totaling four hundred and eight six dollars)(Shoves it in pocket and rolls the squeaking piece of shit cart out of door)"BING! BONG! BING! BONG!..... YOU HAVE ACTIVATED THE SECURITY FUNCTION! .....PLEASE STEP BACK AND WAIT FOR AN ASSOCIATE! BING! BONG!......"(Beans keeps squeaking toward the second set of doors)"EXCUSE ME!"(keeps squeaking)"SIR!"(squeaks thru last door)"SIR!"(turns around and looks at woman following along)"WHAT?""I need to see your receipt" "And why would you need to see it?""You set off the alarm""Well its not my problem your burglar alarm goes off during business hours""I still need to see the receipt" (Beans stares at the gal for a minute before deciding to cause a scene)"Its in my pocket""Ok""And why do you need to see it?""Its policy when the alarm goes off""You cant trot right back there to the register and make yourself a copy?""No, I need to see yours""Why?""Like I said, sir..... its our policy""So this is for my benefit in what way?""Uh..... I dont guess it is, sir""Ok, have a good day then"(Beans starts squeaking again)"SIR!""YEAH?""Please show me the receipt" (Beans stops squeaking and turns around to her and the other fifteen people watching the scene)"Ill tell you what Trixie..... You might think that Im the average idiot that thinks you have some sort of authority over me, but youre sadly mistaken in this particular case. Im gonna do one of two things here..... its your choice..... one is I can keep rolling this piece of shit cart out to my truck and never come back here again....."(manager walks up)".....or I can stand here until you call the police, they detain and search me while I call my lawyer, and a suit can get filed first thing in the morning....whats it gonna be?"(manager whos seen me before speaks up)"Have a good day, sir""How do you get by with calling people thieves around here?""I wasnt calling you a thief""So what was the need for the receipt verification?""Its to make sure you have the items that you purchased on the cart""So the fucking buzzer goes off if I take someone elses cart outside?..... How the **** does it know that?""It doesnt..... it goes off whenever an item hasnt been scanned""Oh, I see.... youre saying that Medusa over there at register three missed something?""Its a possibility....""Then why isnt the ****ing alarm at the registers instead of the door?""....."This went on for a few more minutes before I squeaked the cart back to the returns desk and got my money back. I also paid the remaining balance on the commercial account and canceled the thingIt wasnt a good day to screw with Beans.... Im just glad a cop didnt pull me over or somethingFLB!

[Theraflu 1,035]

Goodness, you're the best.

[loogie 115]

loog, you could carve a cat door into your door. You know, a flap big enough for a cat but too small for a human being. A door, but just for cats. A cat door.

How much are new doors? I'm pretty sure this would kill my deposit. But it may be worth it. It may be. It.

[speedz99 145]

How much are new doors? I'm pretty sure this would kill my deposit. But it may be worth it. It may be. It.

Well, the flap thing is pretty cheap.I'm sure beansey can tell you how much it would be to replace the landlord's door with a very cheap one of your own. Then you could just switch them back when you leave and have the bedroom/cat door for your next place.

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

How can we cast a movie using sickies without a token jew that someone can feebly attempt to compare me to?

Definitely the Priestly character. Definitely

Wyatt Earp – defining characteristics: fearless, loyal, a leader (speedz)Doc Holliday - defining characteristics: loyal and deadly (beans)Virgil Earp – defining characteristics: a little older, wants to do what is right (Ron)Morgan Earp - defining characteristics: a follower, but useful (El Guapo)Curly Bill - defining characteristics: pretends to be a leader, but needs Ringo around to be a real threat (JJJ)Johnny Ringo - defining characteristics: deadly and has no filter (Wang)Sheriff John Behan - defining characteristics: likes to think he’s important, but doesn’t really want to be involved (mk)Marshall Fred - defining characteristics: wants to be the man but knows he’s out of his league (Napa)Johnny Tyler - defining characteristics: surly, a little dumb, and ultimately a coward (SBriand)Hmm, maybe I should remove the defining characteristics on some of those.

This, this is good

I'm no longer even pretending that I can contend with Wang in JJJ's forum challange. I know when I'm beat...I should be downgraded from Wyatt Earp to Ike Clanton.

oh, he did forget Ike didn't he? One of the best characters in the movie.

I don't think I've ever seen tombstone.

Seriously, dead to me.I'm sure I've discussed this before but when I was on the sales floor at Circuit City for 9 hours a day, 5 days a week, this was the only movie we played for a year straight. I seriously used to know every facial expression, hand gesture and line. It was sick. I'm rusty now, but two viewings and I'd be BACK BABY

The other day I walked into his room and he was watching "27 Dresses" by himself. Not the first time something like that has happened. Now, I really actually doubt that he is a closet homosexual but if ten years down the road somebody told me that he was gay, it wouldn't surprise me.

WHAT'S WRONG WITH THAT?DOUCHE

despite having some admittedly disturbing sexual preferences --

you're a faggot. Beat this bitch's ass. Destroy her. Push her until she asks you to let up. Pull that fcking weave right out of her head. Smack her ass until it's red, err, umm, purple. If she puts one of yours in the hospital, put two of hers in the morgue. FINISH HERSorry, I co-mingled my movie lines there, but seriously, timid is for the weak. I'd work every orifice this girl has with fingers, tongues and shoe horns

Sounds like you live with a young Ron Mexico. To make sure see if he has had drunk sex with a Lesbian and faltered.

YOU WOULDA BEEN DEAD FROM WHAT I DRANK

Goodness, you're the best.

While I do love me some Beans, I cringe at the way he abuses the minimum wage crew just following corporate orders. I mean, they're making 8 bucks and hour to check him out, they ain't rocket scientists. They're doing the best they can, which ain't good I'm sure. If they don't stop the customer when the buzzer goes off, they get in trouble. When it happens to me at Best Buy or whatever, I just grin and bear it, because I've been on the other side of that retail nightmare. It ain't fun to be the one doing the stopping, but they have to, to save their jobs. Summary: I love Beansey

[speedz99 145]

While I do love me some Beans, I cringe at the way he abuses the minimum wage crew just following corporate orders. I mean, they're making 8 bucks and hour to check him out, they ain't rocket scientists. They're doing the best they can, which ain't good I'm sure. If they don't stop the customer when the buzzer goes off, they get in trouble. When it happens to me at Best Buy or whatever, I just grin and bear it, because I've been on the other side of that retail nightmare. It ain't fun to be the one doing the stopping, but they have to, to save their jobs.

Yeah, I was cringing at that story. I don't want beans to be that guy. I don't really even see the need to grin and bear it. The alarm is there to make sure people don't shove shit in their pockets and that the checker did his/her job. Seems reasonable to me, and I can usually spare the extra 30 seconds to let them make sure all is well...but I have no life. Seems silly to get offended over a policy like that unless you're an oversensitive blackman that thinks there's a dude in the security room hitting the alarm button whenever a minority gets near the door.

[Sal Paradise 57]

well if beans is anything, he's an oversensitive black man.

[brvheart 1,752]

Ike Clanton- defining characteristics: strong in the presence of weakness, weak in the presence of strength. "Law don't go round here, LawDog!" (???)

brvheart

So I haven't seen this movie except one time in the background, like 18 years ago - so I don't remember anything about it, nor do I remember any minor characters - but this seems to describe my online persona fairly well, unless the area of discussion is something in which I've tricked myself into thinking I know a lot about. (which is nothing except Jesus stuff)In summary, I accept the role of Ike Clanton.

[speedz99 145]

Is anyone else extremely excited to see District 9? Anyone?

[speedz99 145]

Hmm, double post. I'll take this opportunity to say that I like grape flavored Big League Chew.

[strategy 4]

god I hated working the exit "greeter" shift. the day I quit was because some customer complained that I wasn't cheery enough and the manager used it as an excuse to lay into me.

[speedz99 145]

god I hated working the exit "greeter" shift. the day I quit was because some customer complained that I wasn't cheery enough and the manager used it as an excuse to lay into me.

To be fair, you probably weren't cheery enough.

[strategy 4]

While I do love me some Beans, I cringe at the way he abuses the minimum wage crew just following corporate orders. I mean, they're making 8 bucks and hour to check him out, they ain't rocket scientists. They're doing the best they can, which ain't good I'm sure. If they don't stop the customer when the buzzer goes off, they get in trouble. When it happens to me at Best Buy or whatever, I just grin and bear it, because I've been on the other side of that retail nightmare. It ain't fun to be the one doing the stopping, but they have to, to save their jobs. Summary: I love Beansey

Yeah, I was cringing at that story. I don't want beans to be that guy. I don't really even see the need to grin and bear it. The alarm is there to make sure people don't shove shit in their pockets and that the checker did his/her job. Seems reasonable to me, and I can usually spare the extra 30 seconds to let them make sure all is well...but I have no life. Seems silly to get offended over a policy like that unless you're an oversensitive blackman that thinks there's a dude in the security room hitting the alarm button whenever a minority gets near the door.

the person was not doing their job correctly. if the customer doesn't listen and walks out the door, you increase the risk of the store getting sued by pursuing the person. the law is pretty clear about false imprisonment and I am quite sure wal-mart has been nailed repeatedly on that one. the way I read it, she was hinting that he was a thief, exactly what you aren't supposed to do...

[strategy 4]

To be fair, you probably weren't cheery enough.

they hired me to be a cashier. it was my job title. the manager knew I hated being greeter, so she put me there at every opportunity.you're fuckin right I wasn't overly cheery, but I'm also too smart to be rude enough to warrant a complaint to management. I am not even sure that bitch of a manager wasn't just making it up.