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I thought that you just didn't get paid time off, but wanted a week off. You know that I'm not edumacated
oh ok. I thought I went over my whole "forced time off" thing in here. did I not? I don't even read what I write anymore. jesus.but yeah, I will be going to the BEACH probably on sunday. depends on saturday and saturday night really. is there a ufc this weekend?
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If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

and after 3 days, he is risen!

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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oh ok. I thought I went over my whole "forced time off" thing in here. did I not? I don't even read what I write anymore. jesus.but yeah, I will be going to the BEACH probably on sunday. depends on saturday and saturday night really. is there a ufc this weekend?
April 18th, so to answer your question directly, noStrikeforce on Showtime this Saturday. Nick Diaz vs Frank Shamrock
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so uh, what are you planning on doing? gonna be a roadie?
n559107181_888765_2133.jpg
That might be a tad of an overstatement. Ridiculous even, the preferring suicide part. Your attitude is idealistic now, but with this economy, everyone's future has a touch of uncertainty. I get that you will do almost anything you have to to avoid that, but when you grow up, get bills, life takes over, etc, you'll do what you have to do to make a living. True FactPlease don't take that as me being preachy.
some of the news today was pretty encouraging. I might have to take a watered down job with this trading firm in KC, who knows. I sure hope it works out, but if it doesn't, I'll take a shitty corp job, you're right.
The McD's drive-thru is kind of cubical.
a cubicle with an awesome window that opens automatically. I prefer it off though, and whenever anyone takes over they hit the wall like a retard expecting the window to open. it's funny.
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What is so special about it, except that this guy was a professional sports player? People die in car crashes everyday in much more tragic circumstances. It's almost always sad when someone dies, what makes this guy's story "beyond" sad?
You answered your own question. He was going to be rich and famous and would have spent many years entertaining thousands of people every fifth night during the baseball season...yes, that makes it more sad than the average 22 year old being killed (re: "particularly sad"). That's just the way it is. Welcome to America.Yes, I know I'm late on this issue.
You know who I feel sorry for? Kanye WestThe poor guy was obliterated on South Park last night.http://www.rollingstone.com/rockdaily/inde...to-deflate-ego/
That's awesome.
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I picked Olazabal for the sole reason of wanting to root for JMO.
You guys just wait...we're breaking par every round and sneaking in the top 10.Yes, he and I are now "we".
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You guys just wait...we're breaking par every round and sneaking in the top 10.Yes, he and I are now "we".
I picked him too!I have next week off for vacation. I scheduled it for the sole purpose of watching ginormous amounts of baseball, as if the 28 hours I've spent watching it since Sunday at 8 pm aren't enough. My favorite moment so far was with Vin Scully, after Scott Hairston tried to score from 2nd on a grounder to the second baseman. "And there's a baserunning BONER by Hairston to end the inning." Also, with Orlando Hudson now the Dodgers 2B, viewers get to hear Vin constantly call him the O-Dog, which has delighted me every time. "...and Gonzalez slides hard into second base. Hudson helps him up, since that's what the O-Dog does."
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I have next week off for vacation. I scheduled it for the sole purpose of watching ginormous amounts of baseball, as if the 28 hours I've spent watching it since Sunday at 8 pm aren't enough.
you're doing what now? I am not trying to insinuate anything or be an ass. I remember you aren't bagging groceries anymore, but for some reason still kill it at the national level.
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Andy Dufresne: How can you be so obtuse?Warden Samuel Norton: What? What did you call me?Andy Dufresne: Obtuse. Is it deliberate?Warden Samuel Norton: Son, you're forgetting yourself.Andy Dufresne: The country club will have his old time cards. Records, W-2s with his name on them. Sir, if I ever get out, I'd never mention what happens here. I'd be just as indictable as you for laundering that money.[Norton slaps the table]Warden Samuel Norton: Don't you *ever* mention money to me again, you sorry SON OF A BITCH! NOT IN THIS ROOM, NOT ANYWHERE.Renae - I don't get it, but I love me some cuntry musack
ron brings the funny
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surprisingly there was very little of this generosity the year KU dominated basketball. well I should probably specify with that statement shouldn't I.what do you do?
Lefty and his 2 brothers own a specialty plastic printing business. Products are gift cards, hotel key cards, player tracking cards, insurance cards. Don't do credit cards. I am CFO and do sales. Gonna be spending more time selling this year obv.
Nice beer usuage but I'm thinking you fogot something there buddy, he had some hot hookers inDR. DETROIT!http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6z-rZv0E0sk
And he married the smoking hot blonde from the movie.
Donna Dixon was a hotty back in the day. I will have to tell my Dr. Vegas story some time.
Sophomore year, the girl called me completely out of the blue, and said she needed a date to a formal, so I went. I stole a bottle of Tanquerey 10, drank myself into stone-oblivion, and then hooked up with her in her sorority house. It was AWESOME. A few weekends later, I was partying next door, and I ran into her friend. "OMG we should call Mary!" Uh, no. I... kinda have a... date-type-girl thing here. Anyway, Mary showed up, and I tried to juggle the two for awhile until Mary pulled me out the door and into my room to hook up. She stayed at my place, and I was so hungover/still drunk that I barely remembered her leaving. Her friend called me that night and left an angry voicemail because I didn't drive her home like a gentleman, and instead made her trek across campus at 930AM dressed in clubby clothes. Woman, I was totally incapacitated. Also: go stuff yourself
aka as the walk of shame
Yeah, ZZC is right in that it doesn't have the Net Gain going for it. Now if it was a Bengal? That's different!
Speaking of Bengals...congrats on Tank. LOL.
Just another car crash victim in my opinion. Sad, but not a global tragedy. People liked her because she did a bunch of charity work, but in reality all the members of the royal family do extensive charity work as part of their royal duties. She just got more publicity for it.
I would rate her boobs, ass and legs as things I would have tongued. She was a POA.
You guys just wait...we're breaking par every round and sneaking in the top 10.Yes, he and I are now "we".
Well I hope that both of you get sick on your paella tonight.
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you're doing what now? I am not trying to insinuate anything or be an ass. I remember you aren't bagging groceries anymore, but for some reason still kill it at the national level.
I'm the office manager at the grocery store where I was a 2-time state champion. Dealing with all the paperwork for figures, money, supplies, etc. I also get to be a courtesy booth girl and sell lottery/cigarettes when I finish things in the office. It's full time, but its far, far from having anything to do with the BU journalism degree, or making any decent amount of money.
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For Anyone Who is Good at Getting Even With People:Wang? This seems like something you would be good at it.
I have no idea why you think revenge might be one of my strong suits, Poppy, and I'm frankly quite offe-Haha, just kidding. Vengeance serves a few purposes:1) Retribution, as a matter of justice.2) Deterrence. 3) It's fun.#3 really isn't a purpose, and #1 isn't a notion many people subscribe to, but #2 is often the reason I use to justify cruelty. You know the saying "Revenge is a dish best served cold?" It's true. White-hot, angry, knee-jerk reactions never serve the purpose you want them to. Let it hang, Poppy. Make sure you rationally and calmly explain that his behavior will not be tolerated, and that you won't forget it. Then: don't forget it. Wait for an opening, and if in 3 months you see a chance to burn him, and still want to take it, then do it. Maybe you've got 100 dollars that belongs to him, and you decide it's time to exact your revenge by keeping it. Maybe something more drastic. Hopefully something more drastic. When it comes to revenge, the "proportional response" has very little value. Cold, calculated, lethal action sends the message "I am not to be trifled with," more effectively than stealing 75 bucks worth of food from his pantry Who knows? The opportunity will arrive, someday, and you will be prepared to unleash the furious storm of the righteous.First step, I think, is refusing to give him the money directly. Perhaps a post on the league message-board like, "Hey, I am sorry to be a little bitch about this, and I realize you're not going to pay me the money you owe me, but I simply don't feel comfortable giving you the 75 dollar entry fee. Everybody else here knows me, and I will absolutely distribute the money when the season is over in whatever proportion I must to the winners, but I am not giving you 75 dollars to hold on because I don't trust you. Strike that: because you are UNTRUSTWORTHY. If anybody has a problem with that, let me know and we'll work something out, but I'm not letting a welch hold my money."Second step is making sure he knows you aren't going to forget. "I have a bear-trap for a memory, and if you don't give me the money you owe me -- if you don't give me MY money -- I will get it somehow. In some way or another, I will get 100 worth of value from you. With interest."Then, it's simply a matter of eyes/ears open. For more general revenge tactics, Beans is your man. I tend to be very patient. A kid dumped apple-juice on me in the cafeteria my sophomore year of highschool, and it was humiliating because I just took it. When I was 21, I erased every music file on his computer. I thought that was about right.
That might be a tad of an overstatement. Ridiculous even, the preferring suicide part. Your attitude is idealistic now, but with this economy, everyone's future has a touch of uncertainty. I get that you will do almost anything you have to to avoid that, but when you grow up, get bills, life takes over, etc, you'll do what you have to do to make a living. True FactPlease don't take that as me being preachy.
Strat, I was the same way you were when I was your age. Every year, an office job sounds less and less like death. At some point, I realized that work is probably not going to be a source of fulfillment and satisfaction, unless I get really luck. If I have family and kids, I would gladly work an 8-6 to provide them the life I think they deserve. Wang
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I have no idea why you think revenge might be one of my strong suits, Poppy, and I'm frankly quite offe-Haha, just kidding. Vengeance serves a few purposes:1) Retribution, as a matter of justice.2) Deterrence. 3) It's fun.#3 really isn't a purpose, and #1 isn't a notion many people subscribe to, but #2 is often the reason I use to justify cruelty. You know the saying "Revenge is a dish best served cold?" It's true. White-hot, angry, knee-jerk reactions never serve the purpose you want them to. Let it hang, Poppy. Make sure you rationally and calmly explain that his behavior will not be tolerated, and that you won't forget it. Then: don't forget it. Wait for an opening, and if in 3 months you see a chance to burn him, and still want to take it, then do it. Maybe you've got 100 dollars that belongs to him, and you decide it's time to exact your revenge by keeping it. Maybe something more drastic. Hopefully something more drastic. When it comes to revenge, the "proportional response" has very little value. Cold, calculated, lethal action sends the message "I am not to be trifled with," more effectively than stealing 75 bucks worth of food from his pantry Who knows? The opportunity will arrive, someday, and you will be prepared to unleash the furious storm of the righteous.First step, I think, is refusing to give him the money directly. Perhaps a post on the league message-board like, "Hey, I am sorry to be a little bitch about this, and I realize you're not going to pay me the money you owe me, but I simply don't feel comfortable giving you the 75 dollar entry fee. Everybody else here knows me, and I will absolutely distribute the money when the season is over in whatever proportion I must to the winners, but I am not giving you 75 dollars to hold on because I don't trust you. Strike that: because you are UNTRUSTWORTHY. If anybody has a problem with that, let me know and we'll work something out, but I'm not letting a welch hold my money."Second step is making sure he knows you aren't going to forget. "I have a bear-trap for a memory, and if you don't give me the money you owe me -- if you don't give me MY money -- I will get it somehow. In some way or another, I will get 100 worth of value from you. With interest."Then, it's simply a matter of eyes/ears open. For more general revenge tactics, Beans is your man. I tend to be very patient. A kid dumped apple-juice on me in the cafeteria my sophomore year of highschool, and it was humiliating because I just took it. When I was 21, I erased every music file on his computer. I thought that was about right. Strat, I was the same way you were when I was your age. Every year, an office job sounds less and less like death. At some point, I realized that work is probably not going to be a source of fulfillment and satisfaction, unless I get really luck. If I have family and kids, I would gladly work an 8-6 to provide them the life I think they deserve. Wang
Yep. Except I would've reformatted his hard drive.
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Strat, I was the same way you were when I was your age. Every year, an office job sounds less and less like death. At some point, I realized that work is probably not going to be a source of fulfillment and satisfaction, unless I get really luck. If I have family and kids, I would gladly work an 8-6 to provide them the life I think they deserve. Wang
kids, office job "sounds less and less like death" ... seriously who stole wang's password?
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Why are you being so...obtuse?
I finally got to see the beginning of this movie the other day. I've only ever watched it when it's on television and had only seen after the library had been set up. Beginning is good too.
oh yeah, I forgot about that question. assboobslegsand I agree with speedzy, there is something really sexy about a toned, flat stomach, not that I've ever had one. I mean, I've had a girl or two with one, but personally, I've never had one.another part of a dame I like is where the leg meets the hip, on the side, very sexy part of a woman.
Can legs and ass really be seperated? If someone doesn't have nice legs they aren't going to have a nice ass and vice versa. So in that caseLegs/AssBoobsAlso, I'm another one that really likes a nice stomach.
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I have no idea why you think revenge might be one of my strong suits, Poppy, and I'm frankly quite offe-Haha, just kidding. Vengeance serves a few purposes:1) Retribution, as a matter of justice.2) Deterrence. 3) It's fun.#3 really isn't a purpose, and #1 isn't a notion many people subscribe to, but #2 is often the reason I use to justify cruelty. You know the saying "Revenge is a dish best served cold?" It's true. White-hot, angry, knee-jerk reactions never serve the purpose you want them to. Let it hang, Poppy. Make sure you rationally and calmly explain that his behavior will not be tolerated, and that you won't forget it. Then: don't forget it. Wait for an opening, and if in 3 months you see a chance to burn him, and still want to take it, then do it. Maybe you've got 100 dollars that belongs to him, and you decide it's time to exact your revenge by keeping it. Maybe something more drastic. Hopefully something more drastic. When it comes to revenge, the "proportional response" has very little value. Cold, calculated, lethal action sends the message "I am not to be trifled with," more effectively than stealing 75 bucks worth of food from his pantry Who knows? The opportunity will arrive, someday, and you will be prepared to unleash the furious storm of the righteous.First step, I think, is refusing to give him the money directly. Perhaps a post on the league message-board like, "Hey, I am sorry to be a little bitch about this, and I realize you're not going to pay me the money you owe me, but I simply don't feel comfortable giving you the 75 dollar entry fee. Everybody else here knows me, and I will absolutely distribute the money when the season is over in whatever proportion I must to the winners, but I am not giving you 75 dollars to hold on because I don't trust you. Strike that: because you are UNTRUSTWORTHY. If anybody has a problem with that, let me know and we'll work something out, but I'm not letting a welch hold my money."Second step is making sure he knows you aren't going to forget. "I have a bear-trap for a memory, and if you don't give me the money you owe me -- if you don't give me MY money -- I will get it somehow. In some way or another, I will get 100 worth of value from you. With interest."Then, it's simply a matter of eyes/ears open. For more general revenge tactics, Beans is your man. I tend to be very patient. A kid dumped apple-juice on me in the cafeteria my sophomore year of highschool, and it was humiliating because I just took it. When I was 21, I erased every music file on his computer. I thought that was about right.
I knew you would come through...and have a quality little line like "I have a bear-trap for a memory" for me to use. Thanks bud.
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I think we are forgetting something here, there are different levels of office jobs.Here is my list of office job Hierarchy.1. Business owner - You work in an office, but it's your damn company, if you wear a suit and tie, it is because it is appropriate for the type of work you do, or you feel it is significant to set an example.2. Corporate executive (non robot type) yeah it's an office job, but it's a very fulfilling job and you are directly responsible for the prosperity of a large company.3. Mid level executive (paper pusher) This would probably be the worst in my opinion, you make good enough money you can't quit, but not enough that you can justify the job. You are caught in limbo in a job where you get no respect from your employees and not enough praise from your board.4. Cubicle Worker/Data Entry/Secretary etc. - You work 9-5 you get 2 weeks of vacation a year, you have a 401k, you get a small Christmas bonus, you don't have to work too hard, and hopefully you work for a #2 instead of a #3.5. Call center - self explanatory (suicide could possibly be an option here)6. Sal Paradise

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5. Call center - self explanatory (suicide could possibly be an option here)6. Sal Paradise
I very rarely actually laugh out loud while reading, but this one got me. Nice job.
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DonnaDixon3_36.jpg
Shane and I still refer to less than attractive females as Buffy or Hildagard....Less than two percent of sickies will get that jokeAt least thats one percent more than got my MSOffice comments....
For more general revenge tactics, Beans is your man
Im currently in a feud with the local electric company over a new service connection....Yeah, its time to hunt down my insulated gloves and extension ladderRandom incident in VegasI staggered away from the twenty one table about nine one evening, up almost a grand and drunker than who shit in the ditch. My friends (yeah I have them) we still enjoying the slots so I decided to hit the poker tables for a while. Things are pretty slow these days so I was given a seat immediately at a small no limit table. While waiting for my checks I sized up my fellow competitors and struck up a conversation with a few of them"Holy fuck.... this place looks like a wake is in progress"(no comments)"By the looks of all these water bottles this must be a no drinking table"(silence)"God damn guys.... Im gonna start cryin too here in a minute"(dealer grins as brush sits racks down)"Oh.... I didnt notice the sign.... my mistake"(no response from players but dealer responds)"What sign is that, sir?""Theeee hannnn di capped signnnnnn" (said in a retarded-style voice complete with made up sign language)Needless to say, things didnt get off on the right foot....I played for about thirty minutes until my group came back to get me, only hearing the word "raise" muttered by those bastards the entire time Its a good thing I decided to become a fishing proAt least the mosquitoes are sociable....
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I just got home and cracked a beer, so now I have to drink it before I can go to bed. Here's what happened prior to beer being opened.There's this girl.She's British.Before the break between quarters, all of the copywriters and a few art directors from my quarter went out for some karaoke and debauchery. As the night ended, this particular British girl spent an excessive amount of time telling me all the things that are wrong with me. Obviously, she was into me. I don't hook up randomly anymore, so I played it cool, and throughout the break corresponded with her via Facebook personal messages. Verrrrrrrry smooth. So, now our second quarter has begun, and all I can think about is this girl.Thursday is the night that people at my school go out.....because at this one bar, pitchers are $4. I know, Speedz. What a deal! The night starts off well, and I'm working the old school loogie magic...but then she starts getting shitty over some other guy. This guy is like Diet Loogie. He looks a little like me, is a few years younger, and is fathoms less interesting than me. (IMHHHHHHO) Then we go back to her place later (sans Diet Loogie) and she goes on and on about this douche, APOLOGIZES/admits to hitting on me previously, and essentially plays the Not Interested card as fast as one can play it. Meanwhile (throughout the whole night), I tried to ask her out 3 separate times and got diverted each time. This was really quite puzzling and very frustrating.I left with my friend at about 4:20 and arrived home 20 minutes later.That's when I decided to call her. I told her that I tried to ask her out 3 times tonight and felt like I got shot down, so I decided I should try one more time more blatantly. We're going to go out tomorrow night.Maybe I fell into her trap. If so, kudos. How can I not respect that?I had to call her and settle this. There's so much school work to be done. I couldn't just pine about her like I know I would.This is all going to end horribly. One can only hope.

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Can legs and ass really be seperated? If someone doesn't have nice legs they aren't going to have a nice ass and vice versa.
oh that's absolutely not true in my case. but to me, a nice ass is probably a little different that what other people consider a nice ass. I'm talking kim kardashian after a month long bon bon binge. you get an ass like that you tend to lose a little luster in the leg area. fine with me.
I think we are forgetting something here, there are different levels of office jobs.Here is my list of office job Hierarchy.1. Business owner - You work in an office, but it's your damn company, if you wear a suit and tie, it is because it is appropriate for the type of work you do, or you feel it is significant to set an example.2. Corporate executive (non robot type) yeah it's an office job, but it's a very fulfilling job and you are directly responsible for the prosperity of a large company.3. Mid level executive (paper pusher) This would probably be the worst in my opinion, you make good enough money you can't quit, but not enough that you can justify the job. You are caught in limbo in a job where you get no respect from your employees and not enough praise from your board.4. Cubicle Worker/Data Entry/Secretary etc. - You work 9-5 you get 2 weeks of vacation a year, you have a 401k, you get a small Christmas bonus, you don't have to work too hard, and hopefully you work for a #2 instead of a #3.5. Call center - self explanatory (suicide could possibly be an option here)6. Sal Paradise
I mean, as soon as I read the first sentence I was sure my name was going to be involved, I was sure it would not be in a flattering manner, and I was sure it would be pretty damn accurate. all three came to be.also, number 3 is my dream job.
There's this girl.
DUDE. don't take her out. she's a trifling ho. sounds like she was trying to avoid you and you finally got her into a spot where she couldn't say no to me, and even if it was some sort of trap (which I doubt since that would require intelligence, and she's a woman, and, well...) and she was trying to trick you into asking her out or something, **** ALL THAT. no no no. I don't like this at all.although I feel I should add the same addendum I do to all my relationship advice posts: I am a total loser who's never had any real relationship for more than a week in my life, am completely unlovable, and completely incapable of loving anybody else. so there's that.
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So, now our second quarter has begun, and all I can think about is this Thursday is the night that people at my school go out.....because at this one bar, pitchers are $4. I know, Speedz. What a deal! The night starts off well, and I'm working the old school loogie magic...but then she starts getting shitty over some other guy. This guy is like Diet Loogie. He looks a little like me, is a few years younger, and is fathoms less interesting than me. (IMHHHHHHO) Then we go back to her place later (sans Diet Loogie) and she goes on and on about this douche, APOLOGIZES/admits to hitting on me previously, and essentially plays the Not Interested card as fast as one can play it. Meanwhile (throughout the whole night), I tried to ask her out 3 separate times and got diverted each time. This was really quite puzzling and very frustrating.I left with my friend at about 4:20 and arrived home 20 minutes later.That's when I decided to call her. I told her that I tried to ask her out 3 times tonight and felt like I got shot down, so I decided I should try one more time more blatantly. We're going to go out tomorrow night.Maybe I fell into her trap. If so, kudos. How can I not respect that?I had to call her and settle this. There's so much school work to be done. I couldn't just pine about her like I know I would.This is all going to end horribly. One can only hope.
What is one of my exgirlfriends doing in (California? Arizona?) Atlanta?Loogie, I feel as if you handled this situation in the most dominant, most-likely-to-be-painful way possible. I approve. Your stories should include more dialag, though. I think that's what really SETS THE TONE.Keep us posted.
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