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I Called In Sick Today


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Oh yeah, not nearly enough sex. I'm thinking about wrangling this one girl, thin girl, big nose, no boobs, but a willing participant in all things Chris back in the sack, but she's delicate. I've "broken her heart" once. We'll see. I won't be malicious or lie to her about my intentions.
Send her up here...I'll be attracted to her and my parents will approve.
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If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

and after 3 days, he is risen!

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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Hey, me and a buddy are throwing the idea around of going to a Jimmy Eat World show in Chicago near the end of February. Apparently, they are doing a 10 show gig where they are just playing the Clarity album in it's entirety. I hear No Knife is reuniting for a couple of the shows as well. (It was the original tour)If I do this, I'm kissing you on the neck. Show sold out quickly, so we are moving on to plans b and c and d to get tix
dude gdi. i saw they were coming but i didn't know they were gonna play clarity. gfdi. that album...man...reminds me of simpler times...when it was all just skinnin' knees and spelling bees. probably blasted that record and sang every word at the top of my lungs no fewer than 100 times while doing the drive between my parents' house and champaign-urbana. oh, college, how i miss you so.i'll probably pay whatever it costs to get a ticket off craigslist or whatever because hearing them play all 16 minutes of goodbye sky harbor would be priceless.
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i'll probably pay whatever it costs to get a ticket off craigslist or whatever because hearing them play all 16 minutes of goodbye sky harbor would be priceless.
for some reason I don't think this is gonna happen?
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dude gdi. i saw they were coming but i didn't know they were gonna play clarity. gfdi. that album...man...reminds me of simpler times...when it was all just skinnin' knees and spelling bees. probably blasted that record and sang every word at the top of my lungs no fewer than 100 times while doing the drive between my parents' house and champaign-urbana. oh, college, how i miss you so.i'll probably pay whatever it costs to get a ticket off craigslist or whatever because hearing them play all 16 minutes of goodbye sky harbor would be priceless.
I didn't even think about the 16 minute version. I have a live concert CD of theirs and they play a 5 minute version. Still good.Great album thoughmy only extra request is that they play No Sensitivity from that EP with Jebidiah, not that I have a requestalso, now if I go I'll kiss you on the mouthdo you wanna kiss me?No scotty
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There has to be another shoe, hanging precariously by a frayed lace from a telephone wire directly above my head. When it drops, you know damn well I'll share my humiliation here.
(sound of shoe hitting Wang in head)Wang: "Ouch, what the-"(Wang looks up)(Wang sees hundreds of shoes falling from sky)Wang: "Oh brother."--------So, I've got some good news for Speedz, and even better news for Shake.--------So, I ran into Maggie on campus this afternoon.(pleasantries, followed by making of plans to go out later in the week)Maggie: "Hey, I think I need to talk to you about something."Wang: (raises eyebrow) "Well that sounds dire."Maggie: "Yeah, it's just... I had fun the other night, and afterwards I felt kinda guilty about something."Wang: "Goddammit, are you about to tell me you're married or separated or engaged or something?"Maggie: "No, nothing like that."Wang: "Okay, because that would have been pretty shitty. If you're crazy or something, I won't be pissed."Maggie: "Well, you might be mad. And I'll understand if you don't want to see me again. It's not a big deal, lots of guys feel that way. I just figured I should tell you now before we go out again. I should have told you before Saturday, but, I dunno, it never came up, and it's just something that sounds weird to blurt out."Wang: "Okay, whatever it is, I probably won't care."Maggie: "Okay, because if you DO care I wouldn't want to see you again anyway."Wang: "Are you a Nazi war criminal or something?"Maggie: "Uh, no. What? No, I have a kid."
Thank god.
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I forgot. After she dropped the kid bomb, I looked at her for like 10 seconds, and didn't say anything, because I was just processing, and was trying to be really careful not to look, like, shocked or, I don't know, somehow insensitive. When I finally broke my silence, I did so with this beauty of a line:Wang: "So you're NOT a Nazi war criminal? That's a burner."I have NO IDEA what that last line means, or where it came from.

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(sound of shoe hitting Wang in head)Maggie: "Uh, no. What? No, I have a kid."
Wang: Oh, so you do fuck then?orWang: Boy or a girl? No matter, I go both ways for kids under 7
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what breaks are there in february? lol. I'd have to skip a day or two's worth of classes..
but, but, but, it's me.nah, just breakin your stones. I'd miss class for a good JEW concert though. Then again, I was never too fond of class, or work, or anything that I have to be at.
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Hopefully you did the right thing: told her it was great because you loves kids, stuffed her, then deleted her number from your phone and blocked her on facebook.
When did Dawson figure out Mojo's password?Gay One Tree Hill ep in 12 minutes.
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Wang: Oh, so you do fuck then?orWang: Boy or a girl? No matter, I go both ways for kids under 7
Ya, I recovered pretty quickly and made a joke about her having a kid out of wedlock being proof that she's easy.
Hopefully you did the right thing: told her it was great because you loves kids, stuffed her, then deleted her number from your phone and blocked her on facebook.
Would have been awesome to stuff her in the computer lab WHILE blocking her on facebook. Sadly, I don't even know what a facebook is.
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the end of feb is not great timing for me. also probably terrible for any trade watching.
This reminded me of the Celebrity Jeopardy...Sean Connery: "Months that begin with Feb for $400."Trebek: *rolling eyes* "This is the ONLY month that begins with Feb."Sean Connery "What is Febtober?"Trebek "No."
Ya, I recovered pretty quickly and made a joke about her having a kid out of wedlock being proof that she's easy.
If you really said this, I'll go out with you.I have really good qualities that you would probably really like:1. I'm a strong Christian2. I'm socially conservative3. I'm a guy
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also, now if I go I'll kiss you on the mouthdo you wanna kiss me?No scotty
Do you like my car, Dirk? I wanted to make sure you thought it was cool or else I was gonna take it back.
the end of feb is not great timing for me. also probably terrible for any trade watching.
TRAIN DON'T RUN OUTTA WITCHITA. LESSEN YOU'S A HOG OR CATTLE.i'm watching kill bill. haven't seen it in a while, and i'm loving it. so sweet.
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awwwwwwwww, your biological clock is in looooooooove
Nice
I'm assuming Randy was using the blue skin which just turned super gay and the rest of you are using the standard gray theme which had no change.
??? It's weird for me too. Odds are I'll never change it because I'm lazy, but I liked the old way better.
It depends on what you mean by "the grapevine" I suppose. I would love a hard econ guy to give me a breakdown of why insider trading is bad to begin with.
In addition to what whoever said earlier, investors need to believe that the information made public by companies is accurate and that there isn't insider trading going on, or else people will stop investing. Then the economy slows because businesses don't have capital for expansion, market prices fall, etc.
So, I've got some good news for Speedz, and even better news for Shake.
This was good
Maggie: "Uh, no. What? No, I have a kid."
Damn I had money on herpes
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