i hurt myself today...

[HangukMiguk 8]

...just to see if I still feel.Serious post today folks.You guy's have been around the block a while...let me just ask this, fully aware that this may turn into a flame war (usually when I say that, it doesn't).Ever felt pretty damn emotionless thanks to the game? Then, just to see if you still have emotions, you do something to prove it, and then are afraid of what you find out?I hope I didn't confuse anybody.Enjoy.

[Shimmering Wang 1]

...just to see if I still feel.Serious post today folks.You guy's have been around the block a while...let me just ask this, fully aware that this may turn into a flame war (usually when I say that, it doesn't).Ever felt pretty damn emotionless thanks to the game?  Then, just to see if you still have emotions, you do something to prove it, and then are afraid of what you find out?I hope I didn't confuse anybody.Enjoy.

I haven't actually felt one way or another about the outcome of a hand in about 4 months. For real. Only things I feel are "curiousity" and "mild confusion."Wang

[HangukMiguk 8]

I haven't actually felt one way or another about the outcome of a hand in about 4 months.  For real.  Only things I feel are "curiousity" and "mild confusion."Wang

The reasoning behind this isn't exactly poker related, or else I'd have put it in General.Inside the game, you can turn off, for the most part, emotions. It then at one point carries over to real life. (DN wrote a blog up about it, I know).That's what I'm talking about. Emotion in everyday life.

[DrawingDeadInDM 0]

Yes.

[HangukMiguk 8]

Yes.

Glad to know I'm not alone.

[SuM827 0]

...just to see if I still feel.Serious post today folks.You guy's have been around the block a while...let me just ask this, fully aware that this may turn into a flame war (usually when I say that, it doesn't).Ever felt pretty damn emotionless thanks to the game?  Then, just to see if you still have emotions, you do something to prove it, and then are afraid of what you find out?I hope I didn't confuse anybody.Enjoy.

You talk about it like it's a bad thing. Emotion is the source of most bad decisions people make in life.

[KowboyKoop 0]

I was expecting this thread to be about Johnny Cash.

[Dirtydutch 8]

When I think of that song, I think of The Shield (they used that song in the ads for season 5). The Shield rocks my shit. If you want emotion, you should watch Kavanaugh after Mackey fucks up his shit.

[DrawingDeadInDM 0]

Yes.

Glad to know I'm not alone.

A lot of people--especially those attracted to poker and it's accompanying life style--tend to be self destructive to varying degrees.

[HangukMiguk 8]

I was expecting this thread to be about Johnny Cash.

Definitely the stronger of the two versions of this song. He definitely got robbed of that VMA too.Greatest country musician ever.

[mbreon 0]

I was expecting this thread to be about Johnny Cash.

I was hoping for an NIN thread....

[Shimmering Wang 1]

Yes.

Glad to know I'm not alone.

Sure. I have trouble adjusting to reality when I'm in "results don't matter, nothing matters, just take the right course" mode. But that's REALLY true of all parts of life. All one can ever do is the best he can with the information he has. It's tough to feel negative emotions (guilt, regret, etc.) when you make a mistake for the right reasons. And there's nothing WRONG with that, per se. It's also tough to get excited about things when you realize how little control you have over events.I think this is an Eastern philosophy thing, but I don't know enough about it.Also, I am sooooo wasted right now. Cheers.Wang

[Demonde 0]

i was sure this was a redpill thread, no offence

[HangukMiguk 8]

Yes.

Glad to know I'm not alone.

A lot of people--especially those attracted to poker and it's accompanying life style--tend to be self destructive to varying degrees.

It wasn't so much self-destructive really (as in the emo way we now think of it), so I probably could've thought of a better title for the thread. But in essence, the end results hurt me more than any physical pain could.

[HangukMiguk 8]

i was sure this was a redpill thread, no offence

That was the initial response I was expecting when I was writing up this thread.Sorry to let you guys that have over/under bets on him returning down!

[DrawingDeadInDM 0]

Yes.

Glad to know I'm not alone.

A lot of people--especially those attracted to poker and it's accompanying life style--tend to be self destructive to varying degrees.

It wasn't so much self-destructive really (as in the emo way we now think of it), so I probably could've thought of a better title for the thread. But in essence, the end results hurt me more than any physical pain could.

So you put yourself through something just to prove to yourself you feel, and it ends up hurting, but it's not self destructive?

[HangukMiguk 8]

So you put yourself through something just to prove to yourself you feel, and it ends up hurting, but it's not self destructive?  

I know, it sounds absolutely bizarre, doesn't it?Maybe I should go into a little more detail.I intentionally got into a huge blowup argument on the phone with someone pretty close to me.I wound up getting so enfuriated that I threw a corded phone across the room.I then went to the phone, picked it up, slammed it on the receiver, and punched the wall. I apparently punched it pretty hard, because there's now a gaping hole in it from where I punched it.I then called said person back, chewed them out some more, before they hung up on me. I then went down to the basement, where there's a speed bag set up, and beat the living shit out of it, picturing said person.I'm much calmer and collected now, but quite frankly, I have scared myself to death.I have actually told my girl to stay away from me right now, because God forbid if I ever did something like that to her or any girl I was involved with, I would never be able to look myself in the mirror again.So yeah, I've proven I still have emotion. Just not the ones I should really have. That scares me.

[gkunit20 1]

I was expecting this thread to be about Johnny Cash.

I actually agree with Koop. That, or it be by Wang or Beans.

[SuM827 0]

So you put yourself through something just to prove to yourself you feel, and it ends up hurting, but it's not self destructive?  

I know, it sounds absolutely bizarre, doesn't it?Maybe I should go into a little more detail.I intentionally got into a huge blowup argument on the phone with someone pretty close to me.I wound up getting so enfuriated that I threw a corded phone across the room.I then went to the phone, picked it up, slammed it on the receiver, and punched the wall. I apparently punched it pretty hard, because there's now a gaping hole in it from where I punched it.I then called said person back, chewed them out some more, before they hung up on me. I then went down to the basement, where there's a speed bag set up, and beat the living shit out of it, picturing said person.I'm much calmer and collected now, but quite frankly, I have scared myself to death.I have actually told my girl to stay away from me right now, because God forbid if I ever did something like that to her or any girl I was involved with, I would never be able to look myself in the mirror again.So yeah, I've proven I still have emotion. Just not the ones I should really have. That scares me.

This is pretty irrational.

[HangukMiguk 8]

This is pretty irrational.

Yeah, you're probably right. My nerves are shot right now. But I don't really wanna do anything even more irrational right now.Better safe than sorry?

[Demonde 0]

redpill's already back.

[HangukMiguk 8]

redpill's already back.

that's luscious.

[Demonde 0]

redpill's already back.

[nopunk 0]

I was expecting this thread to be about Johnny Cash.

Definitely the stronger of the two versions of this song. He definitely got robbed of that VMA too.Greatest country musician ever.

BLASPHEMY!No one does Trent Reznor like Trent Reznor.No one.Ever.

[CardWarfare 4]

So you put yourself through something just to prove to yourself you feel, and it ends up hurting, but it's not self destructive?  

I know, it sounds absolutely bizarre, doesn't it?Maybe I should go into a little more detail.I intentionally got into a huge blowup argument on the phone with someone pretty close to me.I wound up getting so enfuriated that I threw a corded phone across the room.I then went to the phone, picked it up, slammed it on the receiver, and punched the wall. I apparently punched it pretty hard, because there's now a gaping hole in it from where I punched it.I then called said person back, chewed them out some more, before they hung up on me. I then went down to the basement, where there's a speed bag set up, and beat the living shit out of it, picturing said person.I'm much calmer and collected now, but quite frankly, I have scared myself to death.I have actually told my girl to stay away from me right now, because God forbid if I ever did something like that to her or any girl I was involved with, I would never be able to look myself in the mirror again.So yeah, I've proven I still have emotion. Just not the ones I should really have. That scares me.

I have blowups like that every once in a while myself, due to pent up emotion etc.To give you an example, before I transferred home, out of the upstate school I used to dorm at, I had to pay a $250 bill for tearing the door off the bathroom stall, as well as permenently damaging the door jamb, requiring total replacement.I think the best solution is to find something constructive to consistently take your emotions out on. Most hobbies do this very well, except poker, which I learned the hard way.Personally, I have the guitar and music, as well as the fact that I'm (SERIOUSLY THIS TIME!!) going to start working out / eating better again.It usually works for me.