Fluffdog87 2 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 The Best Quotes from Mike Matusow at the TOC.Most of these were not shown on the ESPN broadcast.What are your favorite quotes from Mike Matusow's on this list?1. Hellmuth says, "You know I finished second in this event last year. There's only one way to improve." To that, Matusow responds, "If you keep getting INVITED to tournaments, it's easy to finish second." 2. Matusow has already started jarring verbally with Phil Hellmuth, taking a break between hands to discuss sunglasses. Then he pulls out the "new, official Mike Matusow sunglasses," and puts them on. They are Raymer-style, with a holographic image over the eyes. But instead of reptile eyes, they feature a hand giving someone the finger. The crowd has a good laugh, as does Hellmuth. This one is not really a quote, but I just had to include it. I guess they could not show this on television. lol3. During the hand, Matusow is introducing the players to the crowd, similar to how he did in a CardPlayer.com video at the WSOP this summer. He calls Dannenmann "the man who ruined my life," and calls Hellmuth "a legend in his own mind." Tony Bloom gets labeled, "the guy who took all my chips yesterday." 4. After the hand, Matusow reminds the crowd that poker is "all skill." 5. Matusow razzes the table some more, getting the crowd in on it a bit as they announce support for their favorite players. Someone says, "We love you, Phil!" and Matusow reacts with shock. He says, "I thought I was the only one who liked you, Phil." Then, a lone person in the crowd says, "We just tolerate you, Mike." That gets the biggest laugh of the conversation.6. After the hand, Matusow says, "Let's make some prop bets. What's the over-under on Phil actually playing a hand today?"7. Tournament Director Jimmy Sommerfeld asks the audience to give a round of applause to ESPN and SoBe's new energy drink (Adrenaline Rush) for sponsoring this event. Mike Matusow then asks the crowd to give a round of applause to Harrah's for inviting Phil Hellmuth to show up and take all of their money. The crowd applauds, but it's likely that only a dozen or so really get the joke. See Daniel Negreanu's blog or Paul Phillips' blog for more details. 8. Hellmuth mocks Matusow after the hand, sarcastically saying he's so steamed that he can't even think straight. "Mike Matusow is so under my skin right now." Matusow hits him with a comeback that I couldn't quite hear, but the crowd laughs.9. Matusow razzes Hellmuth for folding during that last hand, telling him he should raise without even looking at his cards. When Hellmuth refuses, Matusow says, "Oh you can't play poker, you have to play cards." 10. Hellmuth tells Matusow that he's ready to declare war, and Matusow points out that he's already declared war against everyone else at the table. Hellmuth says he's only at war with Matusow. Matusow says it's more like the U.S. against Iraq -- one big bomb, and it's all over. 11. Between hands, Matusow remarks, "When I go home at night, I think to myself, "God I wish I was Phil Hellmuth. 12. Matusow continues his jabs against Hellmuth, saying he's playing too weak-tight. He says he's not afraid to push it all in with nothing. Phil asks, "What happens when you get called with nothing?" Matusow responds, "Who the hell cares? It's better than being blinded to death." Link to post Share on other sites
theredpill99 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 I like Mike Matusow but seriously, he deserved to get his ass beaten really badly after that tourney. I don't care if that type of verbal assault is allowed. He needs his ass beaten a few times. Link to post Share on other sites
theredpill99 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 There needs to be an uncut DVD of this made. I would buy it and hardly ever buy any DVD's. Link to post Share on other sites
Andersun 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 There needs to be an uncut DVD of this made. I would buy it and hardly ever buy any DVD's except Desperate Housewives. Link to post Share on other sites
theredpill99 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 Last DVD I bought was probably a porno and that was about 2 years ago. I've never seen the Desperate Housewives but I'd love to bang Eva Longoria. Link to post Share on other sites
Fluffdog87 2 Posted December 25, 2005 Author Share Posted December 25, 2005 my favorite is #11.11. Between hands, Matusow remarks, "When I go home at night, I think to myself, "God I wish I was Phil Hellmuth. Link to post Share on other sites
ksean9999 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 my favorite is #11.11. Between hands, Matusow remarks, "When I go home at night, I think to myself, "God I wish I was Phil Hellmuth.recycled joke:a guys dies and goes to heavenhe is greeted at the pearly gates by st.peter...st.peter: welcome to heaven young man, would you like a tour?man: yes st. peter, i would love that.st. peter: follow methey approach a room and jimi hendrix is there, playing guitar...man: wow, jimi hendrix. they approach a 2nd room and pablo picasso is there, painting a mural...man: wow, pablo picasso. this is awesome.they approach a 3rd room and stu unger is there, playing heads up against phil helmuth...man: what? phil helmuth?! i didn't know he was dead.st. peter: oh no, no, no dear child... that's not phil helmuth...that's GOD. he just likes to dress up and PRETEND that he's phil helmuth. Link to post Share on other sites
Fluffdog87 2 Posted December 25, 2005 Author Share Posted December 25, 2005 ahahhahahahaahhaahahha lolololool :roll: :wink: :!: actually a good joke on fcp.hilarious.lol :roll: :wink: :!: :evil: :shock: :shock: :roll: :wink: :!: :-) :shock: :evil: :roll: :wink: :!: :roll: :wink: :!: :roll: :wink: :!: Link to post Share on other sites
milestodavid 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 I like Mike Matusow but seriously, he deserved to get his ass beaten really badly after that tourney. I don't care if that type of verbal assault is allowed. He needs his ass beaten a few times.he was in jail.... nuff said. Link to post Share on other sites
bdams19 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 not on point but dannenmann pwning hellmuth was nice Link to post Share on other sites
Golden 2 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 Dannenmann was a completel asshole. I lost mad respect for him.And the jopke above is hailarious. NH Link to post Share on other sites
king_tanner 84 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 Were those your favorite Mike Matusow quotes, or Cardplayer.com's favorites? I can't tell the difference. Link to post Share on other sites
HoosierAlum 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 Fluff, you should have a poll of the top 30 quotes from the T.O.C. Link to post Share on other sites
digitalmonkey 929 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 I didn't find any of Mike's comments to be very funny. Link to post Share on other sites
ksean9999 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 I didn't find any of Mike's comments to be very funny.i think mike's funny at times but it seems like the tv cameras are encouraging him to just be prick. i guess for some people that's funny in the same way the mike tyson is good boxing. Link to post Share on other sites
Golden 2 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 I didn't find any of Mike's comments to be very funny.Seconded.Mike is just....sad. I mean, having your parents take away your computer? How old is he again? Link to post Share on other sites
jooka 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 wonder how many times his family in the crowd had to listen to someone say, "man, he's a prick." Link to post Share on other sites
NortonFan 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 Last DVD I bought was probably a porno and that was about 2 years ago. I've never seen the Desperate Housewives but I'd love to bang Eva Longoria.I think you are trying a tad to hard now. Link to post Share on other sites
The Bwaves 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 my favorite is #11.11. Between hands, Matusow remarks, "When I go home at night, I think to myself, "God I wish I was Phil Hellmuth.recycled joke:a guys dies and goes to heavenhe is greeted at the pearly gates by st.peter...st.peter: welome to heaven young man, would you like a tour?man: yes st. peter, i would love that.st. peter: follow methey approach a room and jimi hendrix is there, playing guitar...man: wow, jimi hendrix. they approach a 2nd room and pablo picasso is there, painting a mural...man: wow, pablo picasso. this is awesome.they approach a 3rd room and phil helmuth is there, playing a no-limit texas holdem tournament...man: what? phil helmuth?! i didn't know he was dead.st. peter: oh no, no, no dear child... that's not phil helmuth...that's GOD. he just likes to dress up and PRETEND that he's phil helmuth.+EV!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Ron_Mexico 4,219 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 I'm halfway through the telecast and I do'n't like what I've seen out of Matasow. He just comes off as a classless druggie. ( I added the druggie part)A lot of his table talk is just out of line. He is entertaining to watch but he comes off as a tool to me.Just sayin. Link to post Share on other sites
beans-n-icewater 18 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 I'm halfway through the telecast and I do'n't like what I've seen out of Matasow. Â Â He just comes off as a classless druggie. Â ( I added the druggie part)A lot of his table talk is just out of line. Â He is entertaining to watch but he comes off as a tool to me.Just sayin.is it on now Ron...ive not seen it yetdont tell me the ending and ruin it.... Link to post Share on other sites
blakheart 3 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 my favorite is #11.11. Between hands, Matusow remarks, "When I go home at night, I think to myself, "God I wish I was Phil Hellmuth.recycled joke:a guys dies and goes to heavenhe is greeted at the pearly gates by st.peter...st.peter: welcome to heaven young man, would you like a tour?man: yes st. peter, i would love that.st. peter: follow methey approach a room and jimi hendrix is there, playing guitar...man: wow, jimi hendrix. they approach a 2nd room and pablo picasso is there, painting a mural...man: wow, pablo picasso. this is awesome.they approach a 3rd room and stu unger is there, playing heads up against phil helmuth...man: what? phil helmuth?! i didn't know he was dead.st. peter: oh no, no, no dear child... that's not phil helmuth...that's GOD. he just likes to dress up and PRETEND that he's phil helmuth.NH Link to post Share on other sites
SweetDaddyFreak 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 Last DVD I bought was probably a  porno and that was about 2 years ago.   I've never seen the Desperate Housewives but I'd love to bang Eva Longoria.can i get a link to your blog? Link to post Share on other sites
TobyOrNotToBe 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 What about Dannenmann flaming up on Hellmuth ? Didn't think my man had it in him, wow. That was the highlight of the show ROTFL. Link to post Share on other sites
Smasharoo 0 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 I like Mike Matusow but seriously, he deserved to get his ass beaten really badly after that tourney. I don't care if that type of verbal assault is allowed. He needs his ass beaten a few times.Not everyone enjoys as poundings the way you do. I mean some do, Rip Taylor, Liberace, Carson Cresley.I mean, not that there's anyothing wrong with it, but I don't think Mike goes that way.good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
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