Jump to content

playing golf with hellmuth


Recommended Posts

So, one of the cool things about Aruba was getting to meet/interact with a lot of the pros in a more relaxed atmosphere then there would be at a normal tournament. One of the players that I got a chance to meet was everyone's favorite man to hate, Phil Hellmuth. I had brought my friend Jason with me to Aruba, who is an assistant pro at Sharon Heights Country Club in Palo Alto, which is where Phil lives. They got to talking about golf, and Phil said he had never gotten a chance to play at Sharon, which is a private course with members such as Jerry Rice, Bill Walsh, Charles Schwab, etc. Jason invited him to play next time he was home, and Phil readily accepted the invitation.As Phil will tell you (often), he is a very busy man these days, so we didn't get a chance to play until this Tuesday, the 6th. It wasn't something I was going to mention on here prior to playing, since I figured there would be a good chance he might flake once or twice before finally showing up. He did show up on Tuesday however, although he was running a bit late. He said he was mobbed by autograph seekers at Fry's Electronics that morning. Heh...classic Hellmuth. Considering he showed up at the golf course in full UB attire (including a circa 1990 Mizuno UB golf bag), looking exactly like he does for a poker tournament, he shouldn't be surprised that people recognize him. Anyway, Phil is _exactly_ like he seems on TV. Seems like a nice enough guy, but the ego is the same as it is on TV. Sometimes I had thought that he acted over the top for the cameras, but after spending 5 hours with him on the course, I can honestly say that's not the case. The Phil you see on TV is the way he is away from the tables as well. Not the blow-ups, the berating etc, but the competitiveness and the ego. For example, he did utter things like 'Well Pat, when you are the best player in the world, people are going to be jealous.' and similar things.We talked about a number of poker and non-poker related things throughout the day, some of which I will have to keep private (for instance, his opinion on other players, etc etc). After playing golf with the guy and getting to know him a bit, I would feel like a rat. :-) He did say he was astonished that the online forums still questioned his abilities however, and that he had to stop reading them because people were so critical of him. Phil used to read RGP and post occasionally, but he stopped once Russ G. came on to the scene. I asked him about Russ, and he confirmed that was the reason he left RGP. He didn't think it was right for a known cheater (Russ) to go on there and slander people, even though Phil wasn't one of those players. So, after watching Phil on the driving range, it was pretty obvious that he wasn't a very good player. Not a pretty swing by any means. :-) I don't play as often as I used to, but I still play at about a 6 handicap, while Phil is closer to a 20 I'd think, perhaps higher. pokerHO had told me that Phil wasn't very good, but a decent putter. Phil seemed pleased when I told him that, and then later on made the comment of 'Pat, my putting is legendary throughout the poker world.' Classic Hellmuth. So, we decide I have to give him 6 strokes a side, and based on how many holes one person wins on the front, then we'll adjust it .5 per hole on the back. My friend is a wussy and is playing for $20 a hole, and Phil suggests we play for $50 a hole (which is nothing really). So I start out and play like absolute garbage...and win the first 5 holes and am up $250. Phil meanwhile is steaming (yes, he used that word), and walks off the 5th green in disgust. We get to the next tee box, and he wants to press to $100 a hole and we do. I finally lose a hole he strokes on when I got greedy on my approach shot and flew the green into a hazard, which made him a lot happier. Heh, I didn't mind because it was a bit uncomfortable with him so pissed off after the first 5 holes.:-)We end up splitting the last 4 on the front side when he wins the 9th hole, which he stroked on. I got a bit unlucky there, because I absolutely stuck my approach shot 2 ft to the right of the pin. Unfortunately for me, it was a wedge and it spun back...down to the 2nd tier. So instead of a make able birdie putt, I had a difficult two putt for par. It was a moot point however, because he ended up somehow making par, minus his stroke on the hole for a net birdie. Now as we go to the back I'm up 250, but I have to now give him 8.5 shots on the back, so pretty much every hole. He won a hole, and then we pushed 3 straight holes, so 14 was worth 400. He hit two balls OB and conceded once I was on the green in 2...lol..and stormed off. So now, I'm up $550, and he wants to press to $200 a hole. I agree, and the first hole after that is this little straightforward par 3..maybe 150, slightly downhill...He goes first and hits it off the back edge, and then I hit a horrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrid shot. Pissed me off because it's a brand new tee box, so they weren’t allowing play off of it, and we had to hit off a temporary mat...I hate mats. So, I hook it to the left of the green, hit a decent flop shot to get within 10ft for par, but he gets up and down and makes my putt worthless. Blah. With that win for him, I'm down to + 350 going to the 16th, but he hacks it around a bit, and for once I played a hole decent and won. So now I'm up 550 again with two to play, and he wants to press to 300 a hole, even though he says it’s unfair to press since I had to give him more strokes on the back. I say I don’t mind; the way I saw it, the worst I could do was lose $50, while the best I could do was win $1150... So, 17 (8 actually, we played the back first) is the number one handicap hole. It's a very long par 4, very narrow. I hit a crappy drive, a crappy approach shot from 200 into the green side bunker, and had an awful downhill lie in wet sand. He played the hole in classic hack fashion, taking three shots to get to the front of the green. I thought there was a decent chance he might get up and down, so I had to make sure I did as well to push the hole. I try to dig under the ball on the downhill lie, and blade it across the green into the rough...MFER. I go over and hit my chip to 3 inches, tap in and at least force him to make his 5fter or so for par. It got a bit comical here, as Phil took like 5 minutes to read the putt. He took his oakleys off, turned his UB hat backwards...Classic stuff...And finally lips it in. ****. So, going to 18, I am now only + 250. He hits his banana slice drive 200 yards out, and I come over the top a bit and pull my drive down the left side. He's in the middle, and again hits an ugly looking 3 wood from 180 yards, that somehow slices to off the back edge. I have a side hill lie with the ball below my feet and hit what looks like a beautiful punch 7 iron. When I get up there however, I see that once again I've spun it back down the hill so I have a 25ft birdie putt instead of a 6 ft putt. He goes first and hits a weak lag putt to like 19ft. I putt and miss it off the left edge, and tap in for par. So, if he makes it he wins the hole, if he misses we tie, and if he 3 putts (not a chance, he always babied his putts), I'd win the hole. Again, he takes forever, hit a weak looking putt, says 'Ben Crenshaw baby, it's in', and somehow gets the ball to lip in and drop... So, last night: Dear PMJackson21,This is a confirmation that you have successfully transferred $50 to philhellmuth. LOL...MFER.... We are going to play again though, possibly the 17th. I played sooooooooooo bad all day, I should have taken him for at least a couple k, and especially since the more I won, the more he wanted to up the stakes. Oh well.The whole experience was very enjoyable however, and Phil truly is a fun guy to hang out with. Sure he's got an ego, but so do a lot of us. He asked me not to say that he was a nice guy because it would ruin his 'rep', but I had to anyway. Patrick

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Replies 98
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

So, if he makes it he wins the hole, if he misses we tie, and if he 3 putts (not a chance, he always babied his putts)
Why does this not surprise me? He plays golf like he plays poker-he'd rather get 500 in on the river 100% to win, as opposed to getting in 10K preflop being 2:1 to win.Awesome post Pat-I look forward to hearing more from future rounds.
Link to post
Share on other sites

Nice story, wish I could get in that game. Sounds juicy!!!I hate mats also. I will not hit off of them unless I have to. I will not use the driving range if I have to hit off the mats. Screws my game up completely

Link to post
Share on other sites

There needs to be a FCP golf/poker tournament weekend. I would definately attend that. Golf and Poker, my 2 favorite vices...

Link to post
Share on other sites
Nice story, wish I could get in that game. Sounds juicy!!!I hate mats also. I will not hit off of them unless I have to. I will not use the driving range if I have to hit off the mats. Screws my game up completely
They're not that bad, you just have to hit it clean instead of trying to carve out a massive pelt out of the astroturf...I prefer hitting (door)mats in my office...
Link to post
Share on other sites
So, if he makes it he wins the hole, if he misses we tie, and if he 3 putts (not a chance, he always babied his putts)
Why does this not surprise me? He plays golf like he plays poker-he'd rather get 500 in on the river 100% to win, as opposed to getting in 10K preflop being 2:1 to win.Awesome post Pat-I look forward to hearing more from future rounds.
Thanks. :-)Heh, also another 'non-surprise', was his take on my exit hand in Aruba. I've asked multiple players that I respect (Matros, Devilfish, etc) for their opinions, and Hellmuth was the first to say he'd have probably folded. Not a surprise considering how tight he is. :-)Patrick
Link to post
Share on other sites

Sweet dude... I always appreciate a good Hellmuth story... its also exciting for me because I think we'd be a good match.Phil's lack of an inner monologue is his best feature... you never wonder what he is thinking...I love golf, but man can it be frustrating. I hate how I can play great for a few holes/rounds... and then have like a 2 week stretch where I just can't hit the ball correctly.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Excellent story!... my teammate is a golfer, and a good one at that, it just gets better and better :-)Whoever had the idea about the FCP outing, man, you are flippin brilliant... someone needs to talk to that Negreanu guy immediately! maybe I should make a Hey Daniel post, lol

Link to post
Share on other sites
Nice story, wish I could get in that game. Sounds juicy!!!I hate mats also. I will not hit off of them unless I have to. I will not use the driving range if I have to hit off the mats. Screws my game up completely
They're not that bad, you just have to hit it clean instead of trying to carve out a massive pelt out of the astroturf...I prefer hitting (door)mats in my office...
I have found that if I try to pick the ball clean on mats, I thin everything I hit the first couple of holes. What I really hate about them is that when you hit the ball a little fat while on mats, you never know it. It still looks and feels like a good swing. Then you get on the course and wonder if you are playing golf are digging graves...
Link to post
Share on other sites
There needs to be a FCP golf/poker tournament weekend. I would definately attend that. Golf and Poker, my 2 favorite vices...
Agreed....listening DN/bus Team??? :-) :-) Great post PM....as I have heard many times....you can learn a lot about a person when you spend 4-5 hours on a golf course with him/her.
Link to post
Share on other sites
Nice story, wish I could get in that game. Sounds juicy!!!I hate mats also. I will not hit off of them unless I have to. I will not use the driving range if I have to hit off the mats. Screws my game up completely
They're not that bad, you just have to hit it clean instead of trying to carve out a massive pelt out of the astroturf...I prefer hitting (door)mats in my office...
I have found that if I try to pick the ball clean on mats, I thin everything I hit the first couple of holes. What I really hate about them is that when you hit the ball a little fat while on mats, you never know it. It still looks and feels like a good swing. Then you get on the course and wonder if you are playing golf are digging graves...
Good call, the transition can be tough...but I think you know if you're hitting it pure even on the mats. Better than no practice at all for me though in this God forsaken city I which I live with the massive amounts of snow (we have a Dome to parctice in during the winter)...Wish I had the problem of winter golf in SoCal with one teebox being redone...I'm here hitting 4 irons into the back wall of a 125 yrd range at $25/hr while it's -25 degrees outside...
Link to post
Share on other sites
There needs to be a FCP golf/poker tournament weekend. I would definately attend that. Golf and Poker, my 2 favorite vices...
Agreed! A golf/ poker weekend would be amazing. We need to make this happen.P.S. Great story PM, that must have been a blast.
Link to post
Share on other sites
Wish I had the problem of winter golf in SoCal with one teebox being redone...I'm here hitting 4 irons into the back wall of a 125 yrd range at $25/hr while it's -25 degrees outside...
Actually, NorCal. :-) Don't let other Bay Area people hear you say that - most people up here hate SoCal. Luckily, as a Dodgers/Lakers fan, I'm not one of them.Yeah, it's a blessing that we can play golf on December 6th and wear short sleeves while doing it. Year round golf is def +EV. :-) I can't imagine having to wait for the courses to thaw out after winter.Patrick
Link to post
Share on other sites

That was one of the best stories that I've read in a while. I was cracking up during the whole story, because I can just imagine Phil being really p.o.'ed after 5 holes. You might not have gotten to play with him again if you took him for a grand. :-)

Link to post
Share on other sites
That was one of the best stories that I've read in a while. I was cracking up during the whole story, because I can just imagine Phil being really p.o.'ed after 5 holes. You might not have gotten to play with him again if you took him for a grand. :-)
Heh, no, I think he'd have wanted it back. If I had played half way decent, I would have had him pressing every few holes to try and catch up. Unfortunately, giving up a stroke per hole _and_ playing like crap was too much to overcome. Still, anything less then $1k of his money there is a choke job in my eyes. :-)Patrick
Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

Announcements


×
×
  • Create New...