Scanner313 0 Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 I don't think it's a matter of which is more important to you, but that if she can't handle it then she isn't right for you.I don't believe in changing who you are for someone else.I'm going to offer just one bit of learned advice on this, as my marriage is ending as we speak over something very similar (and yes, poker is part of it).DON'T GIVE UP THE THINGS YOU LIKE TO DO JUST TO PLEASE SOMEONE ELSE! You are setting yourself up for some serious resentment down the line. If poker is just about the money for you, and you aren't really getting any enjoyment from it, then fine. But I've learned that you have to be who you are, and find a person who's cool with that from the start. Sure, you developed your poker habit later on, but if she can't adapt and understand it's important to you then let her go. There is nothing worse than a girlfriend/wife who doesn't support the things you like to do. Trust me, I know. Link to post Share on other sites
Canada 0 Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 You're the Donk.. You stupid call stationPoker, or going to the mall to buy shoes. If you did the second choice every night, i'm sure she wouldnt mind.Its a simple case of "her problem with it". If i had to chose between a girl or poker, well i chose neither, i chose the girl who doesnt give a rats ass what i do with my life as long as she is part of itYou got one thing right - it's never a case of 'poker or me'. Thats lame.Its about communication.I manage a full time job and 15 hours of poker a week alongside a very hapy 5 year marriage to a girl who doesn't play poker - and I've never been shoe shopping.It takes effort and communication but in the scheme of things its very easy to do and well worth the effort.That said, you've always shown yourself to be a shallow, egotistical fuck, so its no surprise to me that you don't get it. Link to post Share on other sites
Royal_Tour 0 Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 You're the Donk.. You stupid call stationPoker, or going to the mall to buy shoes. If you did the second choice every night, i'm sure she wouldnt mind.Its a simple case of "her problem with it". If i had to chose between a girl or poker, well i chose neither, i chose the girl who doesnt give a rats ass what i do with my life as long as she is part of itYou got one thing right - it's never a case of 'poker or me'. Thats lame.Its about communication.I manage a full time job and 15 hours of poker a week alongside a very hapy 5 year marriage to a girl who doesn't play poker - and I've never been shoe shopping.It takes effort and communication but in the scheme of things its very easy to do and well worth the effort.That said, you've always shown yourself to be a shallow, egotistical censored, so its no surprise to me that you don't get it.What are you a fucking Spazz!?!.. You just aggreed with me you dumb ass.Do you not see it?You just said its about communication, but in your earlier post, you said poker is a past time and not worth losing a friend.Well is it worth hanging onto a friend like that?. No., because you also aggreed that it shouldnt be a case of "poker or me"so In conclusion, if you're going to aggree with me, don't try to come off as the victor.Go censoridian yourself idiot Link to post Share on other sites
poker55 0 Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 Royal Tool- STFU! :roll: Link to post Share on other sites
Royal_Tour 0 Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 Royal Tool- STFU! :roll:alright. You were cute at first but now its just lame & repetitive.I'm puting in a request to have you banned.See ya Link to post Share on other sites
wizzle 0 Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 Well.... im a little depressed as i write this.... my girlfriend of 4 years is ending things with me because she cant take the poker lifestyle anymore..... now those of you in the know... you know what the poker lifestyle is.... coming home late most nights.....smelling like smokepossibly losing a rent payment or 2 in one nightwaking up at 4pm as she walks in from a long day of work...hearing all the war stories for the previous night...not spending as much time with her as she would like... and ETC.....now before people start flaming away.... i am a very good poker player, i play almost all live, no internet poker.... theres always a game where i live and if not then you can find me in atlantic city or Foxwoods playing.... so shes not leaving me because im some degenerate gambler uh, pardon me but it sounds like the exact reason she is leaving you is because you are a degenerate gambler (or there could be other reasons, poker might just be the convenient reason)as for the coming home late/smelling like smoke/losing a rent payment in one night part, this all just more of a reason that you should play online poker. if you end up getting back with this girl, i suggest playing online and getting Pokertracker; if you are legitimately a winning player, there is nothing better to calm a skeptic's nerves than to be able to prove it with detailed record keeping... makes it much easier to explain that, true, you lost the rent payment on 8/12 but you won 16 rent payments total between 7/1 and 9/1, etc.as for the hearing all the war stories part - she doesn't want to hear your war stories. hell, your fellow poker players don't even want to hear your war stories (hence the incessant flaming of bad beat posts), so spare her the gory details of how you lost with AA vs. J6 offsuit and stuff like that, not only does she not want or need to hear stuff like that, it's also none of her business. a lot of people think poker wins are temporary, that there is no way you can win in the long run - hearing crap like that just reinforces that idea to them. accentuate the positives, keep the negative things to yourself, and good luck in your situation - may you meet a woman who is more open-minded and understanding next time Link to post Share on other sites
buchkoba 0 Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 Get a job. Link to post Share on other sites
agsa6079 0 Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 Poker didn't bust up your relationship, your choices did. Your GF didn't start out dating a "professional poker player", and when you made the decision to do so, it had consequences. Not to sound philosophical, but every action has a reaction. The only responsible party is you, in this case. You chose to expand your poker beyond a hobby, and her reaction was to move on. Who can blame her? You might have some sympathy coming if you had started out as a pro poker player when you met and she knew what she was getting into. You chose to go down that path, but that wasn't what she necessarily signed up for, so why waste anymore time?Breakups are a pain and they hurt, but to blame this breakup on anyone (or thing) else except yourself is lame. If you really believe that poker broke up your relationship, you are not ready to play poker full time professionaly. Link to post Share on other sites
Suited_Up 2 Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 Well first off i would like to thank everyone for their response's, i appreciate everyone telling me to keep my head up, im trying...... shes a great girl and we have talked before about poker and its skill level and all of that trust me.... weve talked about it a million times.... if there was a poker game in the daytime, trust me i would play, but locally, all the games start around 7-9 EST.... so that prob would never go away... i make my money from poker, its the way i pay the bills since this past Feb.... i told her i would find a more "steady" job but she said it was too late... im going to hope things kinda of work themselves out and if they dont..... well... that sucks..... but i know eventually if things happen and we go our seperate ways, ill get over it eventually...funny thing is i just left the house for a couple of hours to try to forget about this horrible subject and went to a poker game ( didnt play, just drank a little ) and found out a good friend of mine also just broke up with his girlfriend today and they have been together for 13 years...... so i guess theres something in the water in NY today... sw...Sorry to say, but it sounds like she used poker as an excuse if that's really the case. It's never "too late" unless you wanted out regardless.Keep your head up though. Link to post Share on other sites
speedz99 145 Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 That sucks. But you're better off having it happen now. Sounds like it was going that way eventually, so it's good that you can move on.I recommend heading to the nearest college bar and banging a couple of hot 20 year olds. Link to post Share on other sites
Men the Hellmuth 0 Posted September 9, 2005 Author Share Posted September 9, 2005 Well.... im a little depressed as i write this.... my girlfriend of 4 years is ending things with me because she cant take the poker lifestyle anymore..... now those of you in the know... you know what the poker lifestyle is.... coming home late most nights.....smelling like smokepossibly losing a rent payment or 2 in one nightwaking up at 4pm as she walks in from a long day of work...hearing all the war stories for the previous night...not spending as much time with her as she would like... and ETC.....now before people start flaming away.... i am a very good poker player, i play almost all live, no internet poker.... theres always a game where i live and if not then you can find me in atlantic city or Foxwoods playing.... so shes not leaving me because im some degenerate gambler uh, pardon me but it sounds like the exact reason she is leaving you is because you are a degenerate gambler (or there could be other reasons, poker might just be the convenient reason)as for the coming home late/smelling like smoke/losing a rent payment in one night part, this all just more of a reason that you should play online poker. if you end up getting back with this girl, i suggest playing online and getting Pokertracker; if you are legitimately a winning player, there is nothing better to calm a skeptic's nerves than to be able to prove it with detailed record keeping... makes it much easier to explain that, true, you lost the rent payment on 8/12 but you won 16 rent payments total between 7/1 and 9/1, etc.as for the hearing all the war stories part - she doesn't want to hear your war stories. hell, your fellow poker players don't even want to hear your war stories (hence the incessant flaming of bad beat posts), so spare her the gory details of how you lost with AA vs. J6 offsuit and stuff like that, not only does she not want or need to hear stuff like that, it's also none of her business. a lot of people think poker wins are temporary, that there is no way you can win in the long run - hearing crap like that just reinforces that idea to them. accentuate the positives, keep the negative things to yourself, and good luck in your situation - may you meet a woman who is more open-minded and understanding next timeas any good player should, i keep a detailed database on my poker winnings and loses, and shes the one that helped me set that up and she knows the mostly ups and some downs in detail........ as for everyone else, thanks for your responses...... BTW.. a little update.... were going to seperate for a bit, get our own places, but were going to remain involved, but just with seperation...... so not a complete loss..... so far...... we''ll see what happens.... hopefully for now on most of my posts will be more positive..... 8) Link to post Share on other sites
Fphillips 0 Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 Better now than after you've won a few bracelets and have the Full Tilt endorsement. That would have been expensive. Just a reminder...there are more women where that one came from. Let it ride and go find a new piece of snatch Link to post Share on other sites
foodbanker 0 Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 I'm lucky I have a wife and son who understands. The poker lifestyle is a terrible one. Most women cannot handle it. You must find one that really loves you and take the good with the bad. And always remember to spend at least ONE whole days of the weak with her. If you can't get away ONE Whole day away from poker per week...then you are an addict. In trouble. Link to post Share on other sites
Allie 0 Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 Better now than after you've won a few bracelets and have the Full Tilt endorsement. That would have been expensive. Just a reminder...there are more women where that one came from. Let it ride and go find a new piece of snatch OMG I don't know whether to laugh or go all Gloria Steinham. :shock: Well, I can't stand feminists....so I guess I'll go with LOL on this one. Link to post Share on other sites
Fphillips 0 Posted September 10, 2005 Share Posted September 10, 2005 I guess I'll go with LOL on this one Thanks man, I was worried. Link to post Share on other sites
The Bwaves 0 Posted September 10, 2005 Share Posted September 10, 2005 If you truly love her, let her go.If she truly loves you, she'll be back.Very optimistic approach.My realistic approach:You should have spent more time with her and limited your game time. I know if my chick left me to go wash her hair all night I would be like, "uh, you wash your hair all the ****ing time"!On a side note of realism:There's always someone out there. Even if it isn't what you expect.GL Broski Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now