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question about the character of a poker player


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I've been playing for 3 years, play in a weekly home game and occasional casino live games. Like everyone I wonder if I got what it takes to play professionally or at least proficiently.I'm not worried about my skills, I lack experience not understanding.But my worry is my character, I'm too nice a guy.I find in live games I don't pound on losers who play really poorly. Last week after sucking out on the river to bust aces the player became understandably uspet and a couple hands later when I flopped a third ace I told him to fold because he had no chance to win, then showed him the pocket aces.I read Caro and Doyle about taking advantage of people on tilt and I find it's very hard for me to play that hard on people when they're down.I don't have this problem with tournaments and have made three final tables at small tournaments in the local casinos.But cash games with fish I tend to hold back. And they are the cash cow of the poker world.I also have a hard time leaving when I'm up a couple hundred bucks because I feel bad leaving after winning alot off everyone.Also I get bored playing 3/6 or 4/8 and make loose calls because the money isn't that big a deal to me at these levels ( no I will not come play in your home games) I have never tried my hand at large enough levels to hurt me, but assume I would tighten up and play a tight aggresive game.Wondering your thoughts, if anyone else has this problem?Rob

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ya. I've been there before.at home games, is fine. my friends can afford to lose to me.in a casino setting, the best way to avoid this is to not talk as much.It might be hard, but if your serious about playing for money, and not for recreation, then i suggest going to the table with your game face, and crack some jokes with the other strong opponents at the table when you've mapped them out.You guys will help each other feed off the weak. If i know anything about live cash games, its this.its intimidating to sit at a new table when a couple large stacks are talkin friendly poker chat to each other, and i'm the fresh meat

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Wasn't it Jack Straus who said that you have to be willing to take every last cent from your grandmother (on the poker table) if you want have the mental attitude towards playing poker professionally....if not, who was that?

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a few months ago i was playing 4/8 limit at the trop. there was this guy that was obviously playing with his paycheck, he honestly never won a pot for the 2 1/2 hours he was at my table...it was almost painful to watch him showdown hands..he was an awful player, but he got unlucky so many times to boot...he must have bought in 5-6 times at least..dropped about 5 bills..i felt bad for the guy, but had no problem taking his cash, i knew if it wasnt me it would have been somebody else...this is the kind of player that no matter what happens he's gonna walk away losing money...i feel bad when ppl that cant afford to lose sit down and drop their paychecks, but i realized that they would have no problem raking in my cash....

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Well, this is new. I guess I've always subscribed to the theory that playing poker is about winning money. If taking money from poor players bothers you I suggest one of the following:1. Play at a level that you start to care about the money; 2. Give your winnings to charity;3. QuitI'm not trying to be a di@k, but the reality of the game is to maximize your profit. In my 8 months and few posts, I have stated time and time again the main reason one should truly play poker is to win money. If you're playing because the excitement, the test of no limit, the cool factor, or any other reason people play as YOUR MAIN MOTIVATION, you'll end up dead money in the long run. Laying off of opponents because you feel bad about taking their money will eventually kill your game, and people will take advantage of it. Ask yourself this; Would any of those people done the same for you?

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You have to realize that it does you know good to be the 9th best poker player in the world if you are playing against the top 8. I forget who said that, but if you're not comfortable taking money from weaker players, then there's no point to the game. I used to feel a little bit of guilt creeping in from time to time, but by about the third time I went broke, I mean really broke, I decided that I was playing to make money.

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Play it to win, and adjust the limits according to your conscience.In my home games, I insist on very low limits. Why? Because I know my friends can only afford to lose a certain amount of money... and I know they're going to lose. If I don't take their chips, my daughter will.Without friends at the table, I want everyone's chips in my stack at the highest limit my BR and skill supports. Period. That's what Poker is about. Collecting chips. It's just a happy coincidence that those little pieces of clay or plastic can turn into money at the cage or via the cashout button. ;)I haven't yet run into anyone who I knew was playing with money they couldn't afford to lose. Were I to encounter one, I'd certainly work to take his chips just like anyone else's. During that session. After the game / when he left, I'd probably try to set him toward a more intelligent path. He may or may not listen, but he's human and so am I, so I'd have to try.There are plenty of people bad enough to lose money they can afford to lose that I don't feel it's necessary to unflinchingly contribute to ruining a life, or ruining the life of a family.

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I've been playing for 3 years, play in a weekly home game and occasional casino live games.  Like everyone I wonder if I got what it takes to play professionally or at least proficiently.I'm not worried about my skills, I lack experience not understanding.But my worry is my character, I'm too nice a guy.I find in live games I don't pound on losers who play really poorly. Last week after sucking out on the river to bust aces the player became understandably uspet and a couple hands later when I flopped a third ace I told him to fold because he had no chance to win, then showed him the pocket aces.I read Caro and Doyle about taking advantage of people on tilt and I find it's very hard for me to play that hard on people when they're down.I don't have this problem with tournaments and have made three final tables at small tournaments in the local casinos.But cash games with fish I tend to hold back. And they are the cash cow of the poker world.I also have a hard time leaving when I'm up a couple hundred bucks because I feel bad leaving after winning alot off everyone.Also I get bored playing 3/6 or 4/8 and make loose calls because the money isn't that big a deal to me at these levels ( no I will not come play in your home games) I have never tried my hand at large enough levels to hurt me, but assume I would tighten up and play a tight aggresive game.Wondering your thoughts, if anyone else has this problem?Rob
This is interesting. Just last week I got the slightest twinge of what you're describing, for the first time EVER. I was playing at a particularly fishy low limit table, there was one woman in particular, probably mid-30's who was just giving away money and reloading. For the briefest second I (who am the farthest thing from a bleeding heart) wondered what she was thinking and didn't I feel bad to be taking her money. The immediate answer was no, but I wondered why I was so sure. The conclusion I came to is that I didn't mind because she sat down voluntarily. Nobody held a gun to her head, she was there to have fun and try to win money and I was facilitating that, or at least part of it.The compulsive gambler who is gambling with their family's dinner money is not something I have knowingly encountered. I guess I'll have to figure that one out if I ever know it to be happening.
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Unfortunately, you can not have friends at the table. They are enemies just like everyone else you don't know at the table and you must be willing to take every last penny, if not, you are disrespecting the game and its called softplaying which is highly frowned upon. You have to take every advantage they give you. Your only goal for any session should be to have every single chip on the table.Ex. - my wife wanted to sit at a table with me in Vegas, she lost the vast majority of her stack to me in one hand. After we were done playing she laughed and asked for her money back. I told her hell no and told her why. She now understands that aspect of the game much more clearly.

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Isn't that illegal in most casinos, Socrates?
Are you talking about softplaying? I don't believe its illegal, but you can have the floor do something about it. I run into it all the time at the lower limit tables in Vegas - friends, husbands and wives etc...they just don't understand what it does to the game.
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I can't believe no one mentioned Negreanu's article on this.Personally, yeah I do have "nice guy" issues. I was really bad at soft playing women (not just hot ones i wanted to get in their pants) but like I couldn't beat up on sweet little old ladies.But i guess that changes when you need money because my last trip to the casino i specifically said "I'm gonna kick grandma's aces right down her throat" while I was cracking her AA with 77....i felt bad afterwords though :club:

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Isn't that illegal in most casinos, Socrates?
Are you talking about softplaying? I don't believe its illegal, but you can have the floor do something about it. I run into it all the time at the lower limit tables in Vegas - friends, husbands and wives etc...they just don't understand what it does to the game.
Ring games it's no big deal at all. Just as long as they aren't colluding, who cares if they check it down when they are heads up? I don't.But in tournaments it's a whoooole different ball of wax.
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I don't know how I could ever feel the least bit of guilt after a winning session. I risk my money the same way my opponents risk theirs, and I've lost it many times. It's sucks, but I realize that I lost my money fair and square and that was the chance I took. Every player knows there's a chance they will lose their money. So if they're willing to put their grocery money up, they had better be willing to go without a meal. To be honest, I take everything personally at the table. If I get sucked out on in a really big pot, I want to go punch the guy in the face for making a horrible call and hitting his card. But then I remember it is those horrible calls that will eventually cause this guy to go broke. I think of it as teaching them a lesson when you bust them. After going broke umpteen times they are bound to either educate themselves or quit playing.

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Every player you've ever beaten on your way to a winning session would rather have had the money in their stack at the end of the night, as opposed to having lost it to you. Just the exact same way you've felt at the end of a losing night.If you're going to play this game, you have to get a slightly thicker skin. That doesn't mean you need to be impervious to the misfortune of others though, or that you need to be only a stone faced killer at the tables. No one really likes that guy at the table. But, no one plays this game strictly for the enjoyment of it - we're in it for the money, and that has to come from somewhere. Sometimes it's from people who can afford it, and sometimes it's not.Don't turn it into a value judgement about yourself.

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Isn't that illegal in most casinos, Socrates?
Are you talking about softplaying? I don't believe its illegal, but you can have the floor do something about it. I run into it all the time at the lower limit tables in Vegas - friends, husbands and wives etc...they just don't understand what it does to the game.
Ring games it's no big deal at all. Just as long as they aren't colluding, who cares if they check it down when they are heads up? I don't.But in tournaments it's a whoooole different ball of wax.
HU is a little different - if it affects the way YOU play the hand, its a problem. By simply softplaying the hand with others in the pot will lead to all kinds of problems as you are not aware of their hand strenghts as much as you would if only one of them was in the hand with you. It screws up the game.
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Long before the rise of online and televised poker I loved hosting home games...Basically it was dealers choice. The amounts were small but as the drink flowed it got higher. For some reason everyone wanted to play what we just called "High Low" (Don't know the official name) Bottem line is you just bet whether the third card will fall between or outside the two cards put on the table.If you bet correctly you won your bet or you could bet the pot. If the 3rd card down matched one of the two cards already down you had to match the pot.Here's the sitch my neighbor gets dealt 2 and A so he bets the pot. The next card come a 2. He sent his sober asleep wife to go get $300 dollars to match the pot from the ATM.A few hands later I get A I call it low and the next card come A I bet the pot and win it all. (House advantage I guess)Now to my lesson for you. I tried to give him his money back and all the guys Boo'd saying it was disrespectful. Then at the end of the night alone with him I try one more time which he replies "You are truly a good friend/neighbor but if the shoe was on the other foot I wouldn't have offered it to you."I was floored but as it was stated earlier you are there to win money and turn a profit.I found out how bad of a friend he really was because he never told his wife the truth he let me be the fall guy and his wife confronted my wife at a baby shower and my wife straightened her out in a hurry in front of him.We've never talked since and it OK with me......Sorry so long,Shannon

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