What To Divulge To My Friend About His Girlfriend

[speedz99 145]

I've gotten a lot of conflicting responses, but a lot of responses nonetheless.

What are you talking about? Basically every serious response is telling you to tell him. I hate when people ask for advice and then completely ignore it.

[BigDMcGee 3,352]

Yeah, I'm not gonna **** her.

pussy.

[pezeveng 207]

not posting a pic of a chick you don't like is stupid. You ruined any potential of really bringing this forum back to its glory days.

[Mercury69 3]

What are you talking about? Basically every serious response is telling you to tell him. I hate when people ask for advice and then completely ignore it.

That used to be me, then I took Speedz' advice about taking advice. Now look at me!

[DJ Vu 176]

What are you talking about? Basically every serious response is telling you to tell him. I hate when people ask for advice and then completely ignore it.

Are you sure about that?

I'd say no grounds to step in yet.

I doubt it matters. Nobody breaks up with somebody because his friend doesn't approve.

sorry bro, it's not your place. plus, even if you said something, he wouldn't believe you.

I say let him stick around and deal with what he one day needs to learn to accept: he is a cuckold. Your disapproval will just confuse matters.

You could tell your friend anything about her, but it probably won't do much good. If I were you, I would tell your friend that you won't be spending much time with him/them as a couple because of how you feel about it, but you can't be telling him or her how to run their relationship.

Plus, the poll is currently 9 to 6 in favor of staying out of it.

[mtdesmoines 3]

Yeah, without actually knowing the people, I think it is safe to say the relationship probably won't last, but he probably needs to come to that realization on hsi own, not by his friend meddling in their relationship.

[iZuma 764]

big surprise speedz is wrong AGAIN

[brvheart 1,752]

Are you sure about that?

Did you just quote Mercury to prove your point?

[DJ Vu 176]

Did you just quote Mercury to prove your point?

Yes.

[Mercury69 3]

Did you just quote Mercury to prove your point?

lol

Yes.

You just lost some Forum Credibility points or something. At least, as far as a couple of posters are concerned. Don't worry. It just means you are capable of forming your own opinion based on certain truths that are inescapable.

[The Ocho 970]

It just means you are capable of forming your own opinion based on certain truths that are inescapable.

What? Have you read his posts? He never forms opinions, he just asks questions and lets other people form opinions for him.

[hblask 1]

OK, I'm late to this, but here it goes:If you really think she is sleeping with other guys, you owe it to him to tell him, because of diseases and stuff. If you are not sure, or think it's less than 50/50 that she really is cheating, then it's probably not worth it. If he gets AIDS from here, though, you'll feel guilty.In the end, though, your friend obviously likes this kind of relationship, and when this one ends he will find another one and another and another exactly like it, until his late 30s or early 40s when he seriously analyzes why he likes relationships that slowly destroy him.

[augmented 0]

I am very confident that she is not currently cheating, and if she did that it was more than a year ago and it's a conversation that's long since come to pass. I more just dislike having her around and seeing my homie's priorities so skewed towards not upsetting her or ever growing a pair. I also think she says shitty things about him when she's being bipolar and that it can't be good for him. She's not cheating, but it seems like her cheating would be the only way this relationship could end. If I tell him anything, it'll be that he's being a little bitch and everyone sees it and she's around all the time and it makes them both suck and that I don't want her to move in with the chick I'm trying to date (a development I just found out about today). It's like she sees this coming and is trying to reinsert herself in my way as a contingency plan.

[strategy 4]

are you black? it's important for my opinion

[speedz99 145]

Are you sure about that?Plus, the poll is currently 9 to 6 in favor of staying out of it.

It was a calculated guess...obviously I haven't read any other responses. But, to be fair, it's quite likely that everyone who gave advice other than me is an IDIOT.Although, to be fair, the OP seems kind of ridiculous, so it's quite likely that he's completely wrong about their relationship.

[strategy 4]

do you think he's black?

[speedz99 145]

Hell no. This is a white whine, for sure.

[brvheart 1,752]

Hell no. This is a white whine, for sure.

There has never been anything more obvious. Hell, if he was black he would have already impregnated her just to show his best friend what a pussy he was.

[Nikki_N 17]

Serious response:Stay out of it. Find a new place to live if need be. There's a good chance they will break up eventually but if you tell him bad things about her, true or not, she will likely spin the angle that you're trying to come between them. She's fucking him and you are not. Unless he can count on you to suck his dick and spoon him at night, you're going to lose this battle. If this happens, you might be able to be friends with him after they break up. You win the war, but until that happens, you are her enemy. That means, due to her controlling nature, that you will be off limits to him if he wants to get into her panties ever again. Also, it is unnecessary to make some big pronouncement that you won't be gracing him with your presence much in the future because you don't like her. That statement, no matter how gently put will come off as arrogant and you will solidify yourself as the asshole in this situation. So, spend less time with him when she's around or move out or do whatever you need to do to happily avoid her. If you think telling him all this shit is for his benefit, you're fooling yourself. All this honesty is really only for your benefit. You want your friend to be the guy he was before you introduced him to this girl. You can't make that happen, no matter how much dirt you have on her. Besides, he's probably not so much of an idiot that he can't tell he's dating a bitch. If he didn't want to do that, he would break up with her. People mostly don't do what they don't want to do.

[bleacherbum3 9]

Sorry I'm late to this party, but I'll throw in my .02. I can be pretty objective because I have no feelings.OP:I don't see much point in telling your friend anything now. The comment at the party means nothing. You said she's a bit of a big talker, so maybe she was drunk and doing exactly that with her girlfriends. As for the alleged cheating: on one hand you may get resistance/refusal to believe from your friend which will damage your friendship. On the flipside, if he takes everything you say at face value, how is he not going to be ticked that you didn't say anything a year ago when it supposedly happened? Now he has another year invested in this chick/relationship.The time to think this through and make a decision to talk or not was a year ago. It seems that your main motivation for wanting to bring it up now isn't so much for your friend's sake but that you want this chick out of your house.Either (excellent idea Big D, btw) you do harbor some interest in sleeping with her yourself (it's ok, even if she is annoying, wanting to hatefuck an attractive 22yo is fine), and it's frustrating to constantly be around her fucking your friend all the time, or she really is that annoying/horrible and you just want her gone. Either way, this seems to be a plan to satisfy you primarily.You mentioned that your friend is living in extreme resentment of her and is looking for a way out. Do you think this is actually true, or have you convinced yourself of this to rationalize revealing dirt on her? I'm not trying to make assumptions, but it seems like you're looking for support here to rat her out.Or (and I've seen this happen to many of my guy friends and know how you feel) are you just getting very frustrated of watching your friend be pussy whipped, knowing that he is content being treated that way as long as he's getting laid on a consistent basis?If the situation gets that unbearable, move out I guess.Also, I agree with pretty much everything Nikki said.And I don't think the OP is black either.And obviously, TTIUWP.

[Mercury69 3]

What? Have you read his posts? He never forms opinions, he just asks questions and lets other people form opinions for him.

So much for the "smoke and mirrors" method...

[Tiltinagain 973]

Your friend will put up with this girls shit because she gives great head and probably amazing in bed. You can tell him all you want but its not going to give him a spine because the alternative is jerking off which he's done for far too long.6 months from now when she breaks up with him, he will re enter your life saying I should have just left her can we be friends again

This, and what Nikki said are spot on.Several years ago my best friend (we've been friends since we were 12, now both 44) started dating. At the time he lived in another state so I hadn't met her but from everything he said they had a ton in common, she was hot, great etc... Turns out my family and I moved to the same state/city and my wife and I started hanging out with them a lot. She turned out to be the prototypical only child that thought the sun rose and set on her ass, the whole world revolved around her etc... She hated when my friend and I did anything without her to the point that we had a fishing trip planned and at the last minute she convinced my friend to invite her dad to go with us. She was very jealous of the fact my friend and I (and my wife) were so close. Blah, blah, blah.Anyway when the marriage word started creeping into the conversation, I decided to tell him what I thought, knowing that it probably wouldn't do any good because of the el sexo thing, but I felt like, as his long time friend it was my duty to tell him how I felt. I decided that I would say my piece and then shut up about it. If he went ahead and married her I would never say another negative thing about her because obviously he was ok with what was going on and if he was happy that's great. And I'd feel like I did my part. (As and aside, he was married once before to a girl that nobody liked and she didn't like his friends or family. Everyone tried to get him to call it off, including his Mom 30 minutes before the wedding ceremony. That one lasted 2 yrs) Also, the soon to be bride had been married 3 times previously. Always the guys fault for the break up of course.So, the wedding went ahead, my wife and I didn't receive an invitation, though we were invited to the reception/party the week after which we attended. I barely saw him or talked to him over the next 5 yrs. Then I hear they're in marriage counseling, things are getting so much better, yada, yada, yada. 3 months later, in a counseling session, she tells him that she's filed for divorce and he should expect to receive the papers any day. He was crushed until, about a month later, he found out she had been cheating with a co-worker for the last 3 months at least.My buddy now has his life back together, bought a house and we hang out all the time. He spent Christmas and Thanksgiving day with my family. He's told me countless number of times how he should have listened to me back then. The moral of the story is that the pussy has all the power and always wins. I would tell your friend, knowing that it's probably not going to do any good, at least in the short term, and maybe the long term. But that's me. I believe that a true friend tells you about things that have the potential of hurting you, even if it's not easy to hear and could damage the relationship.

[augmented 0]

i ended up hanging out with these girls i know from school that are both cool, and the gf was there as well last night being an obnoxious drunk twat, but my friend wasn't. yesterday had been a shitty day for me and the stuff she was saying was pretty triggering, so as she stayed there, i drove home and told my friend everything. he handled it pretty well, asked good questions, didn't really say anything unreasonable, so we'll see what happens. i have no idea what he is gonna do but i made it clear that i was willing to lose a friend or two and that i felt really bad that i hadnt talked to him earlier and that yes, it is largely selfishly motivated. i wouldnt be surprised if he doesn't even confront her about it but she doesnt end up being around as much, but who knows. as of now, i don't feel bad.

[Mercury69 3]

On a somewhat related note, anyone ever notice the reason someone cheats on their partner is different in terms of which gender it is? At least, what I see going on is, in general, women get involved with someone else for emotionally motivated resons, whereas men usually are perceived a horndogs and do it strictly for sexual reasons. This, of course, is far from the truth of things, but I find women will use the supposed "lack of intimacy" as a breakup weapon and men will usually go with the "too much of a controlling bitch" thing.Life...it's complicated...

[DJ Vu 176]

On a somewhat related note, anyone ever notice the reason someone cheats on their partner is different in terms of which gender it is? At least, what I see going on is, in general, women get involved with someone else for emotionally motivated resons, whereas men usually are perceived a horndogs and do it strictly for sexual reasons. This, of course, is far from the truth of things, but I find women will use the supposed "lack of intimacy" as a breakup weapon and men will usually go with the "too much of a controlling bitch" thing.Life...it's complicated...

Yeah, we had this discussion in the sick thread a long time ago.Which would feel worse to you?1. You find out your spouse went on a date with someone. Romantic dinner...um, something else that people do on romantic dates...but nothing physical happens.2. You find out your spouse had a drunken one night stand with a stranger.Women usually say 1 would make them feel worse and guys usually say 2.Edit: Ocho, I'm going to make a poll about this to see how I feel.