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Illegal Online Poker Poem


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I just wrote a poem on my lame poker poetry blog called Is Online Poker Illegal?Its not so much about how good the poem is as about highlighting an interesting video about Popular Speculation as to the motives of the doj doin what they done. Anyways, feel free to comment on the blog or in the thread if you like and let me know what you think or add quality info to the post. Thanks for looking.

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can you elaborate on better than worse?

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You realize poems don't need ridiculously simple rhyming schemes where every line rhymes with the next, right? Or rhyming schemes at all for that matter. Most of the poem has absolutely nothing to do with the subject matter, which is probably what he means!

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can you elaborate on better than worse?
I think it peaks somewhere around the word Buick. After that it goes rapidly downhill until the last line which certainly finishes it with some gusto.The whole poem is a little disjointed. The subject matter is online poker yet 50% of the lines are about dogs, birds of prey, cars and lord of the rings characters. Also a typical rhyming poem has couplets of lines which rhyme, not quintets.I have a little free time so I'm attempting to write a limerick. Proving quite hard so far.edit - also there's no real tempo to the poem
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I guess the point was to state a few things i know and then something that i seemingly don't know. Also, i feel like rhyming is appropriate when the subject matter isn't overly serious...

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I wrote three shitty limericksAn employee of the FBI,On a break from getting real high.Indicted stars and Tilt,Hoping to find some guilt.And we've nothing to do except cry.There was a young lawyer from New York,Who was tired of eating substandard pork.He decided, enough!Using laws and stuff,****ed us all in the ass with a fork.Some lawyers thought one day for a joke.They'd stop the fun of lots of honest folk They took away their money,Which we didn't find funny.Now we can't afford hookers and coke.

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I wrote three shitty limericksAn employee of the FBI,On a break from getting real high.Indicted stars and Tilt,Hoping to find some guilt.And we've nothing to do except cry.There was a young lawyer from New York,Who was tired of eating substandard pork.He decided, enough!Using laws and stuff,****ed us all in the ass with a fork.Some lawyers thought one day for a joke.They'd stop the fun of lots of honest folk They took away their money,Which we didn't find funny.Now we can't afford hookers and coke.
A+
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I wrote three shitty limericksAn employee of the FBI,On a break from getting real high.Indicted stars and Tilt,Hoping to find some guilt.And we've nothing to do except cry.There was a young lawyer from New York,Who was tired of eating substandard pork.He decided, enough!Using laws and stuff,****ed us all in the ass with a fork.Some lawyers thought one day for a joke.They'd stop the fun of lots of honest folk They took away their money,Which we didn't find funny.Now we can't afford hookers and coke.
F-
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I wrote three shitty limericksAn employee of the FBI,On a break from getting real high.Indicted stars and Tilt,Hoping to find some guilt.And we've nothing to do except cry.There was a young lawyer from New York,Who was tired of eating substandard pork.He decided, enough!Using laws and stuff,****ed us all in the ass with a fork.Some lawyers thought one day for a joke.They'd stop the fun of lots of honest folk They took away their money,Which we didn't find funny.Now we can't afford hookers and coke.
At least B+
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1. Gollum actually was once known as Smeagol. Don't rhyme lies.And here's a limerick:There once was a judge from NantucketAh, fuck it...
in case you didn't notice, all of the lines are untrue.
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in case you didn't notice, all of the lines are untrue.
I picked on the LOTR reference. Rhyming lies is breaking the first rule of poetry, which I only just now made up: Poetry is Truth.Jeez, dude, you're really ****ing with the muses here...
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It started out as normal, Like any other Friday,Until I saw my friend,He had something to say,Did you hear about Absolute?No, tell me moreThe FBI shut them down, They were breaking the law,But Absolute and UB,They were scumbags already,Surely Tilt and Stars,Are holding steady,I log on to FullTiltPoker.com,"The FBI has seized this URL",No more online poker?And possibly Howard Lederer in a cellWhat will this mean for the World series,And all live events? When Stars is a site,You can no longer frequent, Cardplayer magazine, Pocket fives and deuces cracked, All losing out on business, Thanks to BarackDoyle thinks it's funny, But Jungleman does not, Live nosebleed games again! Aria is the spot,So how will the players,Deal with this transition,Either move to Canada, Or get the DOJ to listen,But money laundering,Is a serious crime, Some poker site execs,May have to do some time,But after that,Regulation, and many more fish?That's what we hope,But right now, it's only a wishI'll admit I'm worried, About poker in the US,How long till it's fixed, I wouldn't hazard a guess,But for now we should all,Relax and calm down,Be happy and joyful, No need to frown,So for all you pros, Don't give up hope,I'm still making a living, Over here in Europe!

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