Jump to content

Vegas Can Suck A Bag Of D*cks


Recommended Posts

So I went to vegas for march madness, at least the opening flurry of 32 games. We flew out on the first flight out Tuesday morning (as I go with friend(s) that work for SWA, so we fly standby and leaving that first flight that tuesday is always the easiest way out there). Things start off great. We get on the flight with no problems, I get a window seat with an empty middle next to me and watch super troopers and then actually catch an hour or so of sleep on the plane!Upon landing we head over to the car rental location and end up getting a dodge charger. Never drove in one before. They are pretty sleek and have a TON of trunk space and leg room. For a full size rental, you could fit 5 men and all the luggage in there comfortably. Much recommended IMO. The other guys with us rented a mustang. It was 81 degrees on Tuesday. Fantastic. We check into the Tuscany for the first night. It's a place just off the strip that Ive actually wanted to check out. It was actually very nice accomidations and a nice, thrifty place. If you have a rental car and aren't necessarily looking to stay at a particular place, I highly recommend this place as a laid back area. So we make all the standard stops. We land early so in and out isn't open yet, so we stop off at MGM and Mandalay Bay so guys can cash in sports tickets from previous trips and then stop at the hilton to see if the lines for the play in/NIT games are up. After that we get in and out. This is always a highlight of my trip to the west. I love it so much. The older guy that's in our group that I don't know that well makes the statement that he doesn't see the difference between in and out and mcdonalds. I spend the rest of the trip periodically referring to this travesty of a statement. Taking a step back, we weren't able to check in at the tuscany until 3, so we then just threw swim gear on and chilled at their pool taking in the weather until check in, also stopping at their small book to put in our first bets of the day. I put in UNC-Ashville under and a few parlays, all of which fail in the first (or only) leg. Once the games kick off we head over to the Wynn to watch the games. As noted, they all fail. Everything. We then relocate to mandalay bay to watch the second half of games and the later games. I decide to chase my early losses on the St. Mary's Gaels. I liked how they played this year, and in their title game vs. gonzaga....and in my watching of Kent St. the whole MAC conference just seemed pretty weak this season.Well, they just miss the first half cover, and then pooch the game cover by losing the game outright. Couple in a few sparse penny slot failures and I've pretty much dropped my first bullet. So I go to bed pretty tired since my day essentially started at 145am PST. Some of the guys stay out, but not for me.So wednesday morning starts, I laugh at being 0-fer in everything I did the prior night. Since I'm up a little earlier than the rest I head over to the workout facility on the property. Nothing amazing, but def adequate. Get a nice lift session in to get the spirits back up. We get a great breakfast at the tuscany and after some loafing around, we check out of tuscany and check into the hilton. I stop at the cash machine and pull out a second bullet....I mean I'm 1 day into a 4 day trip, gotta do some work. We go hit in and out again...I'm not hungry from breakfast, but i still manage to get a single because hey, how often can i get this. After we're checked into the hilton we stop at a walmart and pick up a cooler w/ gatorade and a cheap outdoor hoops ball and we head over to a local park by the airport and run some bball game(s).We promise to never yell at the college kids again for missing FT's after it takes us 3 orbits of FT shooting to shoot for teams. It's always nice to get some fitness while engorging ourselves in sin city. Bball goes well and we head back to the hotel to lay down action on the bball games and figure out what we're doing. After a shower, I put in a couple parlays and then get a monorail pass and head over to venetian on my own to try and get into the 4/8 LO/8 game. I'm able to get into a currently running game within like 10 minutes. I figure, sweet, this is my first win of the trip! A good night of sleep, both a lift session and some good cardio on the hoops court, and now I'm sitting down at my single strongest game....time to make up yesterday's losses .The table is pretty standard, mostly old folk. One younger guy that I end up talking to for a while and a pretty older lady. Well, luckily I make the decision early on that I'm going to enjoy some drinks (not get bombed, but allow for a buzz)....because poker apparently got the memo that I am to be crushed this trip. The oldest guy at the table is just crazy loose player (bucking all trends about old people at the limit omaha/8 table). At least twice in the first hour he was jamming pots preflop, I'd get him isolated by the turn with and then some variant of the nuts for him to make some ridiculously poor low on the river to turn my profit on the hand from like 80 bucks to like 8.Another gem wherein I flop top set with a gutshot straight flush draw on a high only board flop. Four players in the pot with raises on both pre and flop. Turn makes a four to a straight and river blank.I'm not going to pretend I played flawless. But I played winning poker and the cards just didn't cooperate. I end up dropping 1.5 BI at the table and I'm pretty dejected because I'm down a chunk of my second bullet now. At the table the younger guy is talking to me about their friend that they are visiting who is a pro sports bettor and the system that he allows them to participate in with them. Anyways I pry for info for the following day (tourney thursday). He doesn't send out info until that morning though! The one game they are on that night is the 76ers/clippers under. The first half ends and it's right on the mark, so the 2nd half line is also pretty much on the button. So I excuse myself and put in a strong 2nd half bet. They make like the 1st 7 shots of that second half and that bet fails. I allow myself some brief penny slot 'deal or not deal' once i leave the poker table and POOF, I'm down a second bullet. I get back to the hilton with surly drunkish buzz and everyone is already asleep for the night (since we get up at 445am to get seats in the hilton for the tourney!). I look through my money clip for my room key and realize that I've lost my banking card. So I sorta freak out. I call the poker room (as I dropped my IDs when I went to top up in my game) and let them know my table number and seat number.....they look and say nothing was found or is there. So I call my bank and get the card cancelled. After the bank confirms that nothing bad happened w/ my card I start to think that this could be a real positive (put a ceiling on my losses).I decide to just sleep in on thursday....I mean I have 22 bucks in my pocket, no banking card...I'm down two bullets on this trip and 'march madness' hasn't even really begun yet. Our "hookups" for the trip have failed too. We were supposed to have two suites to stay in at the hilton. Yeah, definitely not suites. We were also supposed to all have bracelets for free food/drink at the hilton and VIP seating in the auditorium. Yeah, we got like 2 bracelets for 6 guys resulting in having to just keep switching the bracelets like goons so we could get the food/drink stuff. I decide to take the ATM card loss as a sign and just pass on borrowing money from a buddy and just put some small 5 buck parlays down on random games, etc. Everything fails spectacularly. Only one parlay actually wins the first leg......but no worries...that one loses the 2nd.Everyone in my group ends up losing....I was just the first and most dynamic. After I mention planning to leave early (Friday night flight) 3 of the other guys jump on board. Since we're flying standby this is subject to availability. We note that there are flights at like 7 and 730, both of which have like 20-25 seats open. So at least this looks favorable. The last thing I wanted to do was stay another night sitting there busto and then get up ass early to try and get the first flight out on saturday and if that failed then have to do a full day of travelling and bouncing around to get home!So we get to the airport early, early enough that it's worth a shot to try and even get on the earlier 6pm flight that has like 8 seats open. So check in is a breeze and we're at the flight desk in no time. I'm kinda happy because at least this GTFO process is going simply. I speak to the rep who says its not a problem to put me on the list.....and as she says this her phone rings. She asks me to hang for a moment. After the phone call she informs me and my buddy (since he's an employee) that she was just notified that there's a mechanical problem w/ the plane and it might be a 2 hour delay. Well this blows because after I go check in at the desk for the flight i intended to actaully get on, a slew of people from that prior flight are running over trying to get on this one. So we sit there for an hour.....no big thing as long as that delayed flight still ends up going out, but still not 100% sure. Fast forward and, well, the four of us somehow end up getting the last four seats on the flight we planned on trying to make, and I even end up getting a window seat.So at least the travel home ended up okay.......but lol that it wasn't without some drama as well. Moral of the story, Ive been to vegas like 10 times now. I have never ONCE won money. Moreover, I have never once even started up money (so its not like I win some cash and then give it back and then some or something). I literally have started in a hole from the get-go every time. That said this time was epic in that I did not get to cash a SINGLE sporting ticket, got shelled in my strongest poker game, and never really had any positive showing in the penny slot attempts.I'm alive and healthy and I've always said I have no problem with my poker playing basically just offsetting LV trip fun.....but man I wonder what it would feel like to succeed./TR

Link to post
Share on other sites
I'm alive and healthy and I've always said I have no problem with my poker playing basically just offsetting LV trip fun.....but man I wonder what it would feel like to succeed./TR
thanks for the TR, that was a fun read. Always wanted to be there for the first weekend of March Madness.Dont be so hard on yourself. Just being able to go to Vegas on a standby flight, on what sounds like on a whim, with your buddies, is success in and of itself. That playing bball on some nearby courts? Awesome, wish the buddies I go with would partake in such a thing. Very cool.So you lost. Your not the first guy to come back from Vegas with no money. Keep trying I say, you'll taste victory soon enough. Although, to me, victory was achieved once the plane landed in LV. Anything else is just funds spent on paying for living the right kind of life of gambling+whatever else.And you've pretty much convinced me I gotta do whatever I can to have an I+O burger. Been like 10-15 times, never tried the place.
Link to post
Share on other sites
And you've pretty much convinced me I gotta do whatever I can to have an I+O burger. Been like 10-15 times, never tried the place.
that's a bad beat. good TR, Max, agree with maple.....Vegas is mostly a vacuum cleaner for money you just have to accept it.
Link to post
Share on other sites
thanks for the TR, that was a fun read. Always wanted to be there for the first weekend of March Madness.Dont be so hard on yourself. Just being able to go to Vegas on a standby flight, on what sounds like on a whim, with your buddies, is success in and of itself. That playing bball on some nearby courts? Awesome, wish the buddies I go with would partake in such a thing. Very cool.So you lost. Your not the first guy to come back from Vegas with no money. Keep trying I say, you'll taste victory soon enough. Although, to me, victory was achieved once the plane landed in LV. Anything else is just funds spent on paying for living the right kind of life of gambling+whatever else.And you've pretty much convinced me I gotta do whatever I can to have an I+O burger. Been like 10-15 times, never tried the place.
blasphemy! next trip get the double double animal style! sadly there is not one within 1500 miles from meentertaining trip report-- good news the losses are not normal for you but bad news they are normal for me!
Link to post
Share on other sites

Next time you're thinking about going to Vegas why don't you just give me half the money you were going to bet, I'll take you out to the alley and kick you in the nuts? It'll be quicker for everybody.

Link to post
Share on other sites

We just got 5guys here in Toronto. One of my buddies said its amazing, but another just told me it was smallish, kinda expensive, and not that tasty at all.Looking fwd to trying it out myself soon.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...