you know you're playing a fish when he says...

[aadams_22 3]

Kinda long, but funny. gbmats had built up 3x the buy-in by catching gutshots, then I took it away and he reloaded a couple of times. mentalwar was another donkey that apparently knew him. I love how another random player starts helping me out, and then mentalwar just suddenly gets fed up and leaves.gbmats> does flush bet 3 of a kind??FatterBurger> Only if it's clubs or spadesgbmats> thxmentalwar> u know thatFatterBurger> 3 of a kind beats a diamond or heart flushmikey76> lolgbmats> say again burger?mentalwar> hes lyimgFatterBurger> Black flushes beat three of a kindFatterBurger> But three of a kind beats red flushesmentalwar> no they dontFatterBurger> So confusing sometimesmentalwar> thats not trueFatterBurger> That's why sometimes pepole say "I got the red aces", because they're slightly bettermentalwar> no dudementalwar> they f**king with yougbmats> black Red yes or nomentalwar> straight beats three of a kindFatterBurger> Look it up if you don't believe mementalwar> no matter what what colormentalwar> I gt the rules right hereCely67> whats the worst hand in poker ?mentalwar> nothinggbmats> mine!FatterBurger> Starting hand, or overall hand?Cely67> over allFatterBurger> Pair of red twos I guess*metalwar leaves*Cely67> lol. The second best one !FatterBurger> Pair of black twosCely67> lolFatterBurger> Clubs and spades are the same, the colors are what matterCely67> even on a thursday ?FatterBurger> You're thinking of OmahaCely67> ahhhh, yup. omaha is affected by the days of the weekFatterBurger> I'm glad we're not playing Razz, I lost my lunar calendar*gbmats leaves*Cely67> lolFatterBurger> Last hand for medevildog2> i dont want to seem ignorant but whats razz?

that's classic...what I find funniest of all is that mentalwar never caught on that FatterBurger was feeding the table a line of bullshit

[Pot Odds RAC 23]

Fat, that was pretty darn funny.

[Dratj 0]

that's classic...what I find funniest of all is that mentalwar never caught on that FatterBurger was feeding the table a line of bullshit

[DCSports92GSR 0]

A few weeks ago, I was playing 1/2 NL ( $200 max ) at a local B&M. Haven't established an image yet, and I raised pre-flop with JJ ( previous hand I had bluffed unsuccessfully ). Two callers. Flop is Q-X-X. Check around ( Im OOP ), Turn is another Q, and I bet $25... one guy calls me. River's an Ace, I check and call a $25 bet. Villian turns up AJ. I ask him "Why'd you call on the turn?" Now... keep in mind, I had NEVER played with this guy before, was only at the table for about 10 minutes before this. He goes "I was playing the player"... I said... "by calling with ace high?" he said "I know you like to tilt when you fail at a bluff! I was playing YOU kid, hahahahahahaha... etc etc etc"

[augmented 0]

this has probably already been said somewhere in these 118 pages, and not as golden as some other stuff, but.....playing online heads-up freezeout with my friend, the board is something like AQ733. i can't remember what i have, probably queens or something worse. anyway, i bet the river somewhat hard, i have been betting each street, and he just calls with 777. so i say, "you just called there?"and he says, "because i felt like, if i raised, you woulda folded."good point.

[wsox8 10]

PokerStars Game #6042669191: Hold'em No Limit ($0.02/$0.05) - 2006/08/25 - 01:31:35 (ET)Table 'Etamin II' 9-max Seat #4 is the buttonSeat 1: im jester ($3.90 in chips) Seat 2: forfunguy ($8.48 in chips) Seat 3: briarhead ($6.50 in chips) Seat 4: OHGold ($9.78 in chips) Seat 5: prt49ers ($2.69 in chips) Seat 6: Dee's Chaos ($3.50 in chips) Seat 7: CANFUR ($4.67 in chips) Seat 8: Wsox08 ($11.29 in chips) Seat 9: nepatriot5 ($4.38 in chips) prt49ers: posts small blind $0.02Dee's Chaos: posts big blind $0.05*** HOLE CARDS ***Dealt to Wsox08 [Kd Js]CANFUR: calls $0.05Wsox08: raises $0.10 to $0.15nepatriot5: calls $0.15im jester: calls $0.15forfunguy: folds briarhead: calls $0.15OHGold: folds prt49ers: calls $0.13Dee's Chaos: folds CANFUR: calls $0.10*** FLOP *** [3h Kc 8c]prt49ers: checks CANFUR: checks Wsox08: bets $0.20nepatriot5: calls $0.20im jester: calls $0.20briarhead: folds prt49ers: calls $0.20CANFUR: folds *** TURN *** [3h Kc 8c] [Jd]prt49ers: checks Wsox08: bets $10.94 and is all-innepatriot5: folds im jester: folds prt49ers: calls $2.34 and is all-in*** RIVER *** [3h Kc 8c Jd] [2c]*** SHOW DOWN ***prt49ers: shows [3c 5c] (a flush, King high)Wsox08: shows [Kd Js] (two pair, Kings and Jacks)prt49ers collected $6.13 from pot*** SUMMARY ***Total pot $6.43 | Rake $0.30 Board [3h Kc 8c Jd 2c]Seat 1: im jester folded on the TurnSeat 2: forfunguy folded before Flop (didn't bet)Seat 3: briarhead folded on the FlopSeat 4: OHGold (button) folded before Flop (didn't bet)Seat 5: prt49ers (small blind) showed [3c 5c] and won ($6.13) with a flush, King highSeat 6: Dee's Chaos (big blind) folded before FlopSeat 7: CANFUR folded on the FlopSeat 8: Wsox08 showed [Kd Js] and lost with two pair, Kings and JacksSeat 9: nepatriot5 folded on the TurnYeah I was playing micro limits but I went all in to get rid of the draws but I guess that didn't work. Then this happened:Dealer: prt49ers has a flush, King highDealer: Wsox08 has two pair, Kings and JacksDealer: Game #6042669191: prt49ers wins pot ($6.13) with a flush, King highWsox08: great call therenepatriot5: wow nhsWsox08: hahaprt49ers: tyWsox08: insane that you would call that but you winprt49ers: insane that i would call $2.50 or so??Wsox08: guess there was no way to eliminate the drawing hands like I wanted toDealer: Game #6042679301: Dee's Chaos wins pot ($1)prt49ers: but yes, normally i would not call that. felt lucky i guessOHGold: don't try to explain pot oddsprt49ers: what are pot odds?prt49ers: lol

[timwakefield 68]

Cely67> whats the worst hand in poker ?mentalwar> nothinggbmats> mine!FatterBurger> Starting hand, or overall hand?Cely67> over allFatterBurger> Pair of red twos I guess

I was seriously laughing at that

[Corkey 0]

He needs a bigger truck!

this was a good onethe big stack of a MTT would constantly go allin into small pots and show small pairsme: "why do you bet so big, no one is going to call you unless tyey have you beat"Fish: "I cant lose"Me: "yes you can, if they call with a better hand"Fish: " No, because ill get chips back no matter what"Me: So if you have 13000 and someone doubles up through you with 12999....you dont consider that a loss?"Fish: Nope....I won a chip, its a profit"classic

[SilentButDeadly3 0]

Was playing with some Grandma who was TERRIBLE to my right at a casino. Was a 2/4 game, she limped, and me from the cutoff raises $16 with KK. She calls.Flop: 349Check. I bet $25. She calls.Turn: 8Check. I bet $50. She calls.River: AShe checks and then I check and flip over Kings. She flips over A10."Oh my, I was going for the straight but I guess the Ace will do."I kept my mouth shut but was curious what straight she was going for. A234? I ended up busting her for about $250, which was nice. She had a gambling problem and kept rebuying.

[DudeSurprise 0]

Darko goes in a 20/80 dog on the turn...DARKO D wins ($21.15) with (Flush, queen high).BOD1955:ouchDARKO D:yea rockets suckDARKO D:especially out of positionDUDESURPRISE:hahaha I had position on youDUDESURPRISE:Position is last to actDARKO D:i raised firstDUDESURPRISE:That doesn't matterDARKO D:when you only call preflopDUDESURPRISE:But, uh, I raised PFDUDESURPRISE:*reraisedDARKO D:call me crazy but i always thought having position is havingDARKO D:the ablility to raise firstBOD1955:just first to actDARKO D:yea exactlyBOD1955:not positionedBOD1955:u have it wrong darkoDARKO D:okiMicro limits are fun.

[wsox8 10]

SOCCRMONKEY9:god you are terrible<< Result for Hand 434284371 >>CARDTROUBLE wins ($3.25 chips).SOCCRMONKEY9:u better've had the kingSOCCRMONKEY9:or i will f ucking kill youWSOX08:that might hurtnot necessarily a fish but it was funny

[cu in 4years Dan 1]

well i just got back from a home game and i got bashed for folding pocket 4's on a flop of J 10 Q with the turn being a 4."hey you see! your crap at poker! you would have hit a set!"the even had the audacity to talk about the expected value of that hand.

[Actuary 3]

well i just got back from a home game and i got bashed for folding pocket 4's on a flop of J 10 Q with the turn being a 4."hey you see! your crap at poker! you would have hit a set!"the even had the audacity to talk about the expected value of that hand.

how do they even know you folded 44 ?

[ShieldWolf 0]

At the bar at Bally's, and on ESPN one of the WSOP circuit events is playing (the latest one they aired with DN winning). Guy sitting two spots down from me points to to TV:Him: I can't get enough of that stuff.Me: You play at all?Him: Yeah, online. I make a killing. I've got almost two million dollars in my Party Poker account.Me: Two million?Him: Oh yeah. I mean, it's play money, but...you know.

[XXEddie 0]

how do they even know you folded 44 ?

because he sucks at poker THAT much

[Maastonacci 0]

pstars $13 6 handed sngLevel 2Button makes it 90sb callsI make it 350 or so with KKButton foldssb callsflop 9 high rainbowsb checkI make it 600sb pushI callHe has AQo no draws no nothingturn Ait goes something like this:me: wp nhhim: any 2 cards can win and people bluff with hicards all the time.Now, just exactly what Hi cards did he expect to beat... AJ? he might have had some solid reads about the deck though ;/

[Actuary 3]

I make it 600sb pushI callHe has AQo no draws no nothingturn Ait goes something like this:me: wp nhhim: any 2 cards can win and people bluff with hicards all the time.Now, just exactly what Hi cards did he expect to beat... AJ? he might have had some solid reads about the deck though ;/

as painful as that is, it's much worse when they call and hit imo.He hoped you'd fold AK, or be able to make a "pro laydown" with an overpair with him trying to represen a big hand, like set.******Blinds 50/100Folds to Button who makes i 250I raise to 600 in SB with KKI had 1900 he had 2900 as chip leader preflop.Flop comes 678r. Pot = 1300I shove for 1300.Why? Because this guy had seemed like a gambler earlier and I'm going broke to a set anyway given my stack and the pot and any decent flop bet. This guy easily could have spmething like T8, 99, to protect against.So he calls...... eh... with Ks Ts. One Spade on flop.9 on river.Party cuts me off so no chance to ask "wtf?"

[wsox8 10]

how do they even know you folded 44 ?

I remember when I used to have home games everyone would say what they had after the hand. It was so annoying and got old really fast. "Oh man I folded my J-4 and would have rivered two pair"

[Actuary 3]

I remember when I used to have home games everyone would say what they had after the hand. It was so annoying and got old really fast. "Oh man I folded my J-4 and would have rivered two pair"

yeah, but he plays 20-40!

[bascomeb 0]

SOCCRMONKEY9:god you are terrible<< Result for Hand 434284371 >>CARDTROUBLE wins ($3.25 chips).SOCCRMONKEY9:u better've had the kingSOCCRMONKEY9:or i will f ucking kill youWSOX08:that might hurtnot necessarily a fish but it was funny

that made me laugh. nh sir

[wsox8 10]

yeah, but he plays 20-40!

In which thread did he say that he played 20-40? I thought it might have been in here but I don't want to look.

[UpMySleeve 0]

I have AQ and raise 3bb, he calls with 10 8, Flop is 5 2 8. I bet 1/2 pot, he calls. Turn 3, I check, he bets 1 dollar into a 15 dollar pot lol, Ok I call. River my Q. He then says thisJdegz6: no my dayJdegz6: notK7UpMySleeves: dont call a raise with crapK7UpMySleeves: solves half ur problemsK7UpMySleeves: other half, don't buy a pot with 1 dollarJdegz6: after 6 cards it wasn't crap, this IS a 7 card game, right?K7UpMySleeves: lol nice thinking, ur right, you have to call with any two cards! you could flop trips!Very funny because this happened while reading this thread.

[yergan 0]

MGFish in Quiz Question 20"Hell, i dont want to gamble off most of my stack because im 25% to win the hand and im getting the correct odds."

[Actuary 3]

In which thread did he say that he played 20-40? I thought it might have been in here but I don't want to look.

I do not recall.I read it and it's be referenced by othersHe doesn't deny it

[eYank 0]

At the bar at Bally's, and on ESPN one of the WSOP circuit events is playing (the latest one they aired with DN winning). Guy sitting two spots down from me points to to TV:Him: I can't get enough of that stuff.Me: You play at all?Him: Yeah, online. I make a killing. I've got almost two million dollars in my Party Poker account.Me: Two million?Him: Oh yeah. I mean, it's play money, but...you know.

lmfaodamn...