you know you're playing a fish when he says...

[Guest XXEddie]

I bet the river with Q-highgot called by 9 high"I KNEW YOU WERE BLUFFING WHAT A CALL!"

Oh man I did that once. I got such a good read on my friend once that I immediately called his river all in. He couldn't believe I called and flips over 8 high. I totally forgot I had 5 high.

If only I weren't a newbie.But since I am, a simple "hmm" will have to suffice.

STFU NEWBIE!!!!!(SW)

[btlee 0]

She sits down.... "Um. excuse me... do you play here a lot? I was wondering, how do you know who goes first"Swear to god. I heard it this weekend at Harrah's.Oh, and i still have a Forrest Green Hooded Quilted Harrah's Poker Room jacket for sale. (royal flush prize)I'll never wear it here down south... *grin*

[Guest XXEddie]

i previously posted something about thisFish-"what is that D"me-"the dealer button, it shows whos "dealing" and who acts first and lastfish-"who the **** cares about that"

[sirliej 0]

i previously posted something about thisFish-"what is that D"me-"the dealer button, it shows whos "dealing" and who acts first and lastfish-"who the censored cares about that"

Simply awesome.

[Guest XXEddie]

flop was AA7 me(BB) and SB only in pothe bet i raised to put him all inhe went allin(i raised to about 1200 he had 1245I called with KJohe had QJ"WHY THE **** DID YOU CALL MY ALLIN YOU HAD SHIT"me-it was suited...he got real mad after that

[elkang 0]

"I've got the nuts"when they don't. Sometimes it not even close like when they have "two pair" with one pair on the board. Some of these guys just cannot read all the possibilities on a board. Not so funny, but one I see a lot.The most often comment I see is "lucky bast%rd!". that seems to be the most common thing I see fish say.

[Guest XXEddie]

i have so many....flop T95 all hearts guy goes allin fish callsallin has Q high flush madefish-4x with 4 of heartsheart on riverfish"we both had a flush why didnt we split it

[blackize 0]

My favorite instance was playing .5/1 on Stars the other day.I have AA and EP raises, I 3 bet, SB caps and EP raiser calls. Flop is 46A with 2 spades. SB bets, EP raises, I reraise, SB caps, EP folds. Turn is a 9, SB bets I raise, SB raises, I cap. Turn is the 8 of spades. SB bets, I raise, he 3- bets and I call. He shows 103 of spades for the flush. When the whole table laughed at him and asked why he was capping, he says " thats how you are supposed to play a flush draw idiots"

[Tparks86 0]

"Thinking is fruitless...it's all in the cards."

[btlee 0]

Story One.guy sits down next to his friend whos' been playing at my 10-20 table for a couple of hours...fish: "Dude, I just won 1200 on the NL table." friend: "Then sit down a play a few hand with me, we'll go eat in a min"fish: Anounces to table, "OK, but I hate limit so I'll just cap every hand I'm in...15 mins later he was only up $600.Story 2.Drunk guy with mohawk that can't stop talking about burbon street and asking everyone "what's up with you dog?". no raise. 4 in. flop comes 10 K 9. seat 3 (long hair) bets out.seat 4 folds.I fold (pocket 7's)seat 9 (drunk fish) thnks and calls.turn: 9 (10 K 9) long hair checksmohawk betslong hair raises.fish: "ok fabio... (long hair reference) you wanna rock?"fabio: *shrugs*fish re-raisesfabio makes it 4fish calls and says "I'll cap it"river: Q. no flush possiblefabio betsfish raisesfabio re-raisesI comment to fish: "You do know its Heads up... theres no longer a cap. fish says: "I'll re-raise it all night, dude"fabio again *shrugs*(10 mins later after they have re-raised back and forth until fish is all-in for about $1K)fish jumps up slams down A J and says "Told ya! I got the nuts!!!" reaches for chips.dealer stops him and asks to see seat 3's cards.fabio slow rolls his 10's....

[Jubba 0]

Is this limit? A-x suited should usually try to see the flop at least in limit play. 2-4s is just asking to lose money.

oh, nope its NL. He's calling huge raises and then getting pissed because he's outkicked.

[BigRob 0]

betting X times the amount with pocket AA and having some one call and say well im pot committed for my blind...

[BigBabyJesus 0]

Some guy told me that pot odds only existed for authors to sell books and no one should pay attention to them.

[Guest XXEddie]

flop KKQturn Jriver J5 way capped every streetFish-"DAMNIT I HAD AA....thats poker i guess....can never lay down AA"

[bubbles 0]

... I don't get this thread?

[Guest XXEddie]

... I don't get this thread?

then why are you posting on it

[DCWildcat 0]

1-2 nl gameseems like 9 maniacs at the table (this is the month after Moneymaker wins WSOP on tv) so I feel I will earn enough to buy a house or lose enough to have to refinance the one I have already:)UTG I pick up AAI make it 75 to go, because I know someone will call me:)Sure enough middle position goes all in over me for 300ish. I call and show AA v. his AK I win, but he complains and I quote:"my AK had more outs preflop." Bluefin crazy"HUH?!" hero"Sure AK has 6 outs preflop and AA only has 2" Bluefin crazyObviously I can barely count all the things wrong with his statement so I do the smart things and get up to have a smoke . I come back to the table 10 minutes later and 3 of the players are still debating which hand had more "outs" preflop.God bless everything Moneymaker did for this game.

Ahahahahahahahahahahaha

[bubbles 0]

humour police...I think Pebbles has taken over Fred's account...

[DCWildcat 0]

(On explaining his entries into highly raised pots with such hands as J6s, T7o, and 98),"Poker is about winning the pots you're not supposed to win. SO when I play those hands and I hit my two pair you'll never expect it."Three hands later, I lose $40 to him on the following hand:Hero raises 4x BB UTG with JJ, Dumbass calls in the buttonFlop: J95. Hero bets, UTG raises, hero calls.Turn: 5. Hero bets, UTG raises all in, Hero calls. UTG flips 57oRiver: 5Boy he sure showed me. (I friended him and made it back later).

[21gambit 0]

In a live tourney"pocket aces are only a 53 percent favorite over any hand, even 23o"I act pompous and make fun of the guy, telling him that they are a 87 percent favorite over 23 and about 80 percent over anything.Later in the tourney he convinces someone into calling my pre-flop all in"Bust Mr. Pocket Aces ass"...The aces held up...Also, the same guy called a big bet on the river with jack high mumbling something about pot odds, lol

[Guest XXEddie]

limp with KJs from MP3i bet turn when K hits 2 callersJ on river but brings third heartguy bets i fold and show"WHY THE **** DID YOU FOLD!!! YOU CANT FOLD 2 PAIR!!!!"he had the flush

[Guest XXEddie]

they ebt 5000 into a 100 dollar pot and brag about blufing

[bubbles 0]

At a B+M a woman puts down her $100 in chips...but pauses and says... Is this not 2-4...someone's comment...Can't you tell by the sunglasses, this is 3-6? She regathers her chips and leaves.

[pbwl11 0]

2/4 limit game at our local B&M....I raise utg with KK, get three callers. BB (shortstacked with about $20 left) says "I have to follow the 'in for half' rule." and calls. Flop comes K73 rainbow. I bet, two fold, BB thinks for a full minute and says "well, let's see one more card" Turn comes another 7. I bet, he raises. I reraise. He looks at me for a second and says "I know I got you beat, so I'll bet the rest of my stack" and flips over 7 3 (both hearts) for the small boat. I flip my kings and he actually says "I wouldn't have played them at all if they weren't suited!" :roll: And then just to add insult to injury....the river was a K!Fish moans about his bad luck, the calls a chip runner for another rack.... :clap:

[fryer98 30]

When I'm talking about the "Do you call if you're in BB with AA on the first hand of the WSOP Main Event and everyone goes all-in before you?" situation that comes up here, and the fish says "I would call, but I'd rather have AK, because then you can get your A or K."WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT? :shock: