you know you're playing a fish when he says...

[Leafs 0]

Short stacked, I jam with KJs in the CO and the BB who has a slightly bigger stack than me calls with Q8s... 8 on the flop and I'm gone... He says "thats exactly what I put you on!" ala our friend at the WPT last year. Nice call.

[scatory2 0]

"lets play $2 - $4 limit"

[scatory2 0]

"wanna play $2 - $4 limit?"

[goatboy1970 0]

In the middle of a freeroll one guy at the table catches pocket 10s, raises it up, the BB calls, a guy so drunk he can barely see his cards. The board is 7s 5s 9h. BB checks, 10s bet, BB calls. Turn is a 9s. This is where it gets interesting. The guy with 10s accidentally flips one of his cards, the 10 of spades. BB checks, 10s bet, BB calls. River is 4s. There are 4 spades on the board and the second player is playing with the 10 of spades face up, showing a 10 high flush. The BB bets, the second player goes all in for the remainder of his chips (about 1/4 of the pot), the BB calls. The BB turns over 6-3 offsuit, proclaims, "I got the straight, beeyotch," and reaches to drag the pot. The other player informs him that his exposed 10 of spades gives him a flush and that a flush beats a straight. The BB cusses and leaves the table, along with his remaining chips.

[Nutcracker 0]

In the middle of a freeroll one guy at the table catches pocket 10s, raises it up, the BB calls, a guy so drunk he can barely see his cards. The board is 7s 5s 9h. BB checks, 10s bet, BB calls. Turn is a 9s. This is where it gets interesting. The guy with 10s accidentally flips one of his cards, the 10 of spades. BB checks, 10s bet, BB calls. River is 4s. There are 4 spades on the board and the second player is playing with the 10 of spades face up, showing a 10 high flush. The BB bets, the second player goes all in for the remainder of his chips (about 1/4 of the pot), the BB calls. The BB turns over 6-3 offsuit, proclaims, "I got the straight, beeyotch," and reaches to drag the pot. The other player informs him that his exposed 10 of spades gives him a flush and that a flush beats a straight. The BB cusses and leaves the table, along with his remaining chips.

1 story, 2 fish, I love it.

[BigDMcGee 3,352]

"I played like Danny Nyguen tonight"

[gkunit20 1]

"I played like Danny Nyguen tonight"

LMAO

[Guest XXEddie]

early in SnGme 900fish 1100folds to fish in SB who moves allin(15/30 blinds)I have AA in BB and call, Fish has AK, AA holds"youre lucky I overplayed my hand"

[BigDMcGee 3,352]

early in SnGme 900fish 1100folds to fish in SB who moves allin(15/30 blinds)I have AA in BB and call, Fish has AK, AA holds"youre lucky I overplayed my hand"

Well, he'sright.. doesn't take much skill to call all in preflop bets with AA

[fryer98 30]

michgolface: i've made 5 bucks so far at this table, you ?

[DCWildcat 0]

"Go Michigan! Beat Ohio State!"

[KingAustin 0]

You know you're talking to a fish when this happens.

Flopped a royal a couple of months ago and beat quad aceshttp://www.pokerhand.org/index.php?page=vi...iew&hand=127932

Ok, I see the hand and I have to ask you: How the hell do you not reraise him all in after he reraised you on the river?? I mean, wow.

He asks why you didnt re-raise all in in a limit game, and THEN...

Flopped a royal a couple of months ago and beat quad aceshttp://www.pokerhand.org/index.php?page=vi...iew&hand=127932

Ok, I see the hand and I have to ask you: How the hell do you not reraise him all in after he reraised you on the river?? I mean, wow.

you better be kidding or else a pirhanna needs to fellate you.

Why would I be kidding, it looks like he left him with some cash. Villian has 68 bucks at start of the hand. your mom fellated me last night. it was good!

It's limit holdem you cock jaw. Let me repeat that and emphasize accordingly, hell I'll even quote it for more emphasis,

LIMIT

Ah, and you must be a censored limit player as well. Limit is for pussies that cant handle making a call for all their chips. I F'd your mom last night as well. Not bad.

Says limit players are pussies.

[jben 0]

"Go Michigan! Beat Ohio State!"

Glad to see that worked out for ya ... nothing like giving up 2 TDs in the last 7 minutes ...Have a nice time at The Alamo BowlGo Bucks!!!!!!!Edit: Ooops ... sorry .... just saw the pic ... obviously Go Michigan is what the fish say.In that case .. HOW BOUT THEM BUCKEYES!!!Hopefully they'll come to here to Phoenix in the Fiesta Bowl for the 3rd time in 4 years. I'd love to crush Notre Dame.JbenOSU '86

[Pupsta 0]

rofl...i meet 2 fish in this tourney, betting min into a raised pot, stuff like that...then after the guy goes allin with toppair and is called by an underpair that turns a set:nelnines (Observer): U FKING KUNT WHORRREnelnines (Observer): FKING DUMBESS FKING CALL I HAVE EVER SEEN KUNTfun times

[the red bull 0]

rofl...i meet 2 fish in this tourney, betting min into a raised pot, stuff like that...then after the guy goes allin with toppair and is called by an underpair that turns a set:nelnines (Observer): U FKING KUNT WHORRREnelnines (Observer): FKING DUMBESS FKING  CALL I HAVE EVER SEEN KUNTfun times

:shock: How much was the buyin, if it got him so pissed off?

[KingAustin 0]

rofl...i meet 2 fish in this tourney, betting min into a raised pot, stuff like that...then after the guy goes allin with toppair and is called by an underpair that turns a set:nelnines (Observer): U FKING KUNT WHORRREnelnines (Observer): FKING DUMBESS FKING  CALL I HAVE EVER SEEN KUNTfun times

:shock: How much was the buyin, if it got him so censored off?

You'll see this at any level, my guess is <$20

[fryer98 30]

michgolface: i don't understand why people don't play more hands in these 5-10 roomsmichgolface: it's no fun not playing

[wilheldp 0]

"A2567 is better then [sic] A3457" (Talking about the low end of Omaha Hi/Lo)Playing $.50 PL Omaha 8/better on Pokerroom. Apparently this guy has a house rule at his home game that lowball hands are ranked by the highest card then it goes from the lowest card up. He revealed this fact after asking why he lost low in a hand similar to his quote above. He spent the next half hour defending the way he plays the game with the rest of the table asking him how often he reloads, if he has ever played a lowball game before in his life, etc. He busted out not too long after this...at least he donated $50 and some laughs to the table.

[ChunkyLuver69 0]

BEST FISH QUOTE EVER!!!at a local 2 5 pl gamehave AK raise 2 people callflop 10 J Q rainboweveryone checks turn = QI bet out FISH callsRIver 8me put the guy all inFISH callsfish holds pocket 8sfor a full houseI say " you called that bet with all those over cards"FISH says " I DIDNT THINK YOU HAND ANY OF THAT I PUT U ON POCKET 9s"

[socdave 0]

Playing in a home game where we play dealers choice between texas and omaha. The one player has been losing quite a bit, and when it is his turn to deal he goes "Lets try omaha, i mean, since there are double the cards, i have double the chance to win right?" The entire table just started cracking up, and this guy could not understand why.

[kelda 0]

In a game at the local bar. 1/2 NL Very loose guy raises 10 with AK , me in the cutoff with A9 flop A 9 3 . I bet 10 he raises all in for 75 I call . The guy catches runner runner for a flush. I said nice hand, nice suckout also with a smile on my face and he goes nuts. That isn't a suckout you f-ing moron , A suckout is when I get you all in and I have the best hand you stupid fish. I couldn't even speak for 10 minutes just laughed

[kelda 0]

In a game at the local bar. 1/2 NL Very loose guy raises 10 with AK , me in the cutoff with A9 flop A 9 3 . I bet 10 he raises all in for 75 I call . The guy catches runner runner for a flush. I said nice hand, nice suckout also with a smile on my face and he goes nuts. That isn't a suckout you f-ing moron , A suckout is when I get you all in and I have the best hand you stupid fish. I couldn't even speak for 10 minutes just laughed.I am on my way back to that game in about 25 minutes

[kelda 0]

In a game at the local bar. 1/2 NL Very loose guy raises 10 with AK , me in the cutoff with A9 flop A 9 3 . I bet 10 he raises all in for 75 I call . The guy catches runner runner for a flush. I said nice hand, nice suckout also with a smile on my face and he goes nuts. That isn't a suckout you f-ing moron , A suckout is when I get you all in and I have the best hand you stupid fish. I couldn't even speak for 10 minutes just laughed.I am on my way back to that game in about 25 minutes

[Abbaddabba 0]

In a game at the local bar. 1/2 NL Very loose guy raises 10 with AK , me in the cutoff with A9 flop A 9 3 . I bet 10 he raises all in for 75 I call . The guy catches runner runner for a flush. I said nice hand, nice suckout also with a smile on my face and he goes nuts. That isn't a suckout you f-ing moron , A suckout is when I get you all in and I have the best hand you stupid fish. I couldn't even speak for 10 minutes just laughed

You called $10 against a guy with a stack of $85 with an extremely marginal hand, and he had you dominated. He played everything as well as he could have.You made a horrible call preflop, and hit the best flop you could possibly hit.

[Abbaddabba 0]

In a game at the local bar. 1/2 NL Very loose guy raises 10 with AK , me in the cutoff with A9 flop A 9 3 . I bet 10 he raises all in for 75 I call . The guy catches runner runner for a flush. I said nice hand, nice suckout also with a smile on my face and he goes nuts. That isn't a suckout you f-ing moron , A suckout is when I get you all in and I have the best hand you stupid fish. I couldn't even speak for 10 minutes just laughed

You called $10 against a guy with a stack of $85 with an extremely marginal hand, and he had you dominated. He played everything as well as he could have.You made a horrible call preflop, and hit the best flop you could possibly hit.