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Out Of Curiosity.

phlegm

By phlegm,
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LongLiveYorke

LongLiveYorke 38

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I'd say, "If you really wanted us to believe in you, then couldn't you have provided any real evidence that was meaningful. And what do you really care about our belief in you. Aren't you the omnipotent and omniscient creator of the universe? Who cares what a bunch of meat monkeys think. Why do you even have emotions and opinions to begin with? And doesn't the idea of being able to 'talk' in heaven seem moronic, since we're supposed to be fully outside of time and space itself. Shouldn't our heavenly existence be a singularity, a topological defect in the fabric of space-time that is without thought or being, without time, without space, without opinions or emotions. So little of this makes any sense. In fact, the total nonsense of this all convinces me right now that I"m not actually in heaven but rather in a dream. Only in a dream would heaven conform so well to the pop culture belief. So, I'm going to ignore you right now, God, and go have a lucid dream about Natale Portman. Good day."I'd say some things along those lines.

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simo_8ball

simo_8ball 0

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Lets assume there is a God, you die and are standing there prefloop with bad cards. He asks you why you mocked him by arguing that the faith of his existence was the providence of the ignorant. WHAT WILL YOU SAY? I was too intelligent to believe in you? I agree that the possibility of this situation is not reason enough to start believing, but in all seriosness what would you say. You certainly cannot argue that you were just a simple human too unable to believe can you, because youve been saying all along that it is only tools who believe.
Hey, man, I was wrong ok. Can I ask a few little things though just before you ship me off to Hell? Why did you make it all look like you didn't exist? I mean, what's with the dinosaurs? Seriously? Was that the first earth you made, you thought you'd start over but couldn't be bothered to tidy up first so you just left them to fossilize? You made the whole universe look like it was natural. Like all life evolved, and that everything came from the Big Bang. Why? You could have left something mystical unexplained. It just seemed so obvious you didn't exist. The world acted and reacted as it would were you not there.Also, why did you not give any clues as to which religion we should follow? I mean, there were so many to choose from and each of them claimed they were the one true faith. All it would have taken was for you to do ONE SODDING THING to point me in the right direction. I mean, the 9/11 hijackers - you saw that story, right? - they thought they were doing YOUR BIDDING. They thought YOU WOULD ****ING REWARD THEM FOR IT WITH VIRGINS. Most people thought (and still think) they were evil. They weren't. They were just so deluded by your supposed promises that they thought it was the correct, moral and righteous thing to do. Were they supposed to realise at some point in their Islamic upbringing that actually Christianity was the way to go?All you needed to do was come to them in a vision, or whatever the hell it is you do. A few visions here and there, or a couple of verifiable Christian miracle to an Islamic leader, and there you go. Maybe a second coming of Christ? Was that in the pipeline? That would sway much of the earth. You're either an absolute idiot or you're ****ing evil. Which is it? Oh, and don't give me that 'holier than thou' attitude.Ok, I didn't believe in you. Fine. Big deal. I still led a good life. I wasn't evil. In fact, other than the belief in you part, I was a pretty damn good Christian. You want to condemn me to an eternity in Hell for not praising you and worshipping you every day? How ****ing egomaniacal are you? You're an ******* is what you are. Simple as that. You're a spoiled brat that throws his toys out the pram when things don't go your way. I'm glad I never worshipped such an evil bastard as you.Ooooooooooh, that's one other thing before you ship me off to hell. Why the **** did Jesus not think to mention that the earth was round? You know, with him being your son and all. Did he really just not think to tell anyone? I mean, surely he knew? You know what - I don't even care. **** you, God.I think I'd say something along those lines.
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Balloon guy

Balloon guy 158

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I'd say, "If you really wanted us to believe in you, then couldn't you have provided any real evidence that was meaningful. And what do you really care about our belief in you. Aren't you the omnipotent and omniscient creator of the universe? Who cares what a bunch of meat monkeys think. Why do you even have emotions and opinions to begin with? And doesn't the idea of being able to 'talk' in heaven seem moronic, since we're supposed to be fully outside of time and space itself. Shouldn't our heavenly existence be a singularity, a topological defect in the fabric of space-time that is without thought or being, without time, without space, without opinions or emotions. So little of this makes any sense. In fact, the total nonsense of this all convinces me right now that I"m not actually in heaven but rather in a dream. Only in a dream would heaven conform so well to the pop culture belief. So, I'm going to ignore you right now, God, and go have a lucid dream about Natale Portman. Good day."I'd say some things along those lines.
But the fact you are standing before Him makes your argument slightly....flawed
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Balloon guy

Balloon guy 158

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Hey, man, I was wrong ok. Can I ask a few little things though just before you ship me off to Hell? Why did you make it all look like you didn't exist? I mean, what's with the dinosaurs? Seriously? Was that the first earth you made, you thought you'd start over but couldn't be bothered to tidy up first so you just left them to fossilize? You made the whole universe look like it was natural. Like all life evolved, and that everything came from the Big Bang. Why? You could have left something mystical unexplained. It just seemed so obvious you didn't exist. The world acted and reacted as it would were you not there.Also, why did you not give any clues as to which religion we should follow? I mean, there were so many to choose from and each of them claimed they were the one true faith. All it would have taken was for you to do ONE SODDING THING to point me in the right direction. I mean, the 9/11 hijackers - you saw that story, right? - they thought they were doing YOUR BIDDING. They thought YOU WOULD ****ING REWARD THEM FOR IT WITH VIRGINS. Most people thought (and still think) they were evil. They weren't. They were just so deluded by your supposed promises that they thought it was the correct, moral and righteous thing to do. Were they supposed to realise at some point in their Islamic upbringing that actually Christianity was the way to go?All you needed to do was come to them in a vision, or whatever the hell it is you do. A few visions here and there, or a couple of verifiable Christian miracle to an Islamic leader, and there you go. Maybe a second coming of Christ? Was that in the pipeline? That would sway much of the earth. You're either an absolute idiot or you're ****ing evil. Which is it? Oh, and don't give me that 'holier than thou' attitude.Ok, I didn't believe in you. Fine. Big deal. I still led a good life. I wasn't evil. In fact, other than the belief in you part, I was a pretty damn good Christian. You want to condemn me to an eternity in Hell for not praising you and worshipping you every day? How ****ing egomaniacal are you? You're an ******* is what you are. Simple as that. You're a spoiled brat that throws his toys out the pram when things don't go your way. I'm glad I never worshipped such an evil bastard as you.Ooooooooooh, that's one other thing before you ship me off to hell. Why the **** did Jesus not think to mention that the earth was round? You know, with him being your son and all. Did he really just not think to tell anyone? I mean, surely he knew? You know what - I don't even care. **** you, God.I think I'd say something along those lines.
But the fact you are standing before Him makes your argument slightly....flawed
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simo_8ball

simo_8ball 0

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But the fact you are standing before Him makes your argument slightly....flawed
What argument? I'm just asking him why he made it seem like he didn't exist. Like, "why did you do such a good job of hiding if you wanted to be worshipped?"
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ShakeZuma

ShakeZuma 585

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what the hell is going on with this thread
simo's first post has the original op quoted. thats what we were responding to. apparently he was quite drunk, altered it, and it became funny. well, at least to me.
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