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Herr Mensch

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Posts posted by Herr Mensch

    need computer help with online poker fraud

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    I heard a highly secure password is your birthday, no one guesses that. I always use 1234 as my PIN also.
    NO WAY!!! That's the code to my luggage lock!
    You guys aren't gonna believe this, but...In the number system that I personally use, the first four nonzero digits are1, 2, 3, and 4.... IN THAT EXACT ORDER!!!some freakin coincidence, huh? Small world, man. Wow.Mensch

    new online player, best sites?

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    I have found UltimateBet to be the best all-around site, starting with the interface. Simple, straightforward, fast, and reliable. No silly cartoon avatars.The players are better than average, with a sprinkling of rocks and fish. If you want folks calling your preflop 4xbb raise with 5-3 off and turning a 6 high staright to beat your Kings, you won't find it here, except at the micromicrolimits.Holdem, Omaha, O-8, 7stud, 7stud8, Triple Draw lowball, and pineapple. Royal Holdem at the playchip tables. Stakes from $.01 - $.01 to $300-$600 limit Holdem and $.01 - $.02 to $50-$100 No limit. SitnGos from $1 to $5000. Dozens of MTTs every day, starting at $1.50% signup bonus, if you are referred by a friend. (Ooh! me! ME! PICK ME!!!!(UB name: Herr Mensch)) "Player Appreciation Day"s roll around every few months for 50% reload bonuses.Hope to see you there.Mensch

    full tilt or ub?

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    As much as I pimp UB, I ought to save a .txt file with a standard monologue.I have found UltimateBet to be the best all-around site, starting with the interface. Simple, straightforward, fast, and reliable. No silly cartoon avatars. The players are better than average, with a sprinkling of rocks and fish. If you want folks calling your preflop 4xbb raise with 5-3 off and turning a 6 high staright to beat your Kings, you won't find it here, except at the micromicrolimits.Holdem, Omaha, O-8, 7stud, 7stud8, Triple Draw lowball, and pineapple. Royal Holdem at the playchip tables. Stakes from $.01 - $.01 to $300-$600 limit Holdem and $.01 - $.02 to $50-$100 No limit. SitnGos from $1 to $5000. Dozens of MTTs every day, starting at $1. 50% signup bonus, if you are referred by a friend. (Ooh! me! ME! PICK ME!!!!(UB name: Herr Mensch)) "Player Appreciation Day"s roll around every few months for 50% reload bonuses.Hope to see you there.Mensch

    song parody time

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    Why am I takin --- all these bad beatsall these fishies swimmin all around my feetsOh man just one time --- why can't I seethe best hand holding up for me?I'm on a Prima --- poker siteI'm on a Prima -- yi yi, poker site..."Mexican Radio" by Wall of VoodooWho needs to apologize to the rest of us for that song, incidentallyMensch

    online tournaments

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    I don't look at enough to give you an average, but right now UB is running a $10 tournament that started with 210 players, a $20 that started with 160, and a $30 that started with 155. All NLHE.Before the day is out, they will run 4 more open MTTs at $10, 2 HE and 2 Omaha. Also 2 invite only $10 tourneys. There are 3 more $20 MTTs today, and one more $30. There are dozens of each scheduled over the course of a week.Mensch

    the most basic tutorial

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    If the OP is so new at the game, mensch, would you recommend they play the play money tables at various sites before playing real money?
    Only to the extent of learning one's way around the software. No longer.The only decent play I have found on playchip tables is in playchip SnGs. After the maniacs (half the players, sometimes two-thirds) bust out, maybe 8-10 hands in, a few serious players are left to contend for the pretend prize. In my experience, these players actually play to win.Depending on your cards from the first five minutes, you're likely to be either a big chip leader, ar a significantly shorter stack than average. Both of which are opportunities to practice a certain style of play.Mensch

    the most basic tutorial

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    You'll think I'm jopking, but...Sit 'em down in front of a WPT or WSOP video. We chuckle at VVP and Norman Chad commentary and the "Here are the Miller High Life Rules for Texas Hold 'Em", but lots of these new faces learned to play on TV before they ever opened a book or googled "poker strategy".After a few hours of video, they'll know how to play badly, but they'll know how to play. Then the educatin' can begin.Mensch

    time for a bluff?

    in Other Poker Cash Games

    Posted

    Both of the above are correct, but you are correct in theory. The time for a successful bluff in Omaha or O8 is when the nut type changes You are watching for people to speed up or slow down here, to know whether you can pull off a bluff. But it won't work is small stakes, and you shouldn't be playing this censored anyway.Mensch

    online tournaments

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    I like the tournaments at UB. 1500 chips (2500 for $100+ tournaments), 10 minute escalations for SnGs, 12 minutes for MTTs. Level 11 (after the second break in a MTT is still only 150 - 300 with a 25 ante. Nice and slow. No all-in fest.Unless of course you like all-in fests. The Turbo tourneys have 5 minute escalations :roll: (not a fan).UBs biggest kink right now is that they don't spread enough SnGs at the lowest levels for their new SnG setup to be agreeable. Often there is a list of 75 or more players waiting for five 10-seat tables to finish up. With the slow structure of UB SnGs, this can be a 2 hour wait for #75. The MTTs can get big. Right now there is a $200 + $15 NLHE running that startes with around 600 players. First prize is just over $30k. I would be interested in knowing how this compares to other sites' big tourneys.Mensch

    omaha 8ob- pot-limit or limit?

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    All the way, PLO8.If you're a good O8 player, and can read others' betting patterns, PLO8 is supremely lucrative. The skill in PL is primarily in post-flop play. (This was also discussed in a PL HE post earlier today). You're watching especially for people to slow down or speed up when the nut type changes. Don't let anyone tell you that Omaha is not a bluffing game. PL gives you the leverage to make effective turn and river moves.Mensch

    anatomy of a fish

    in General Strategy

    Posted

    I was on a party poker multi-table I literally did not play one hand for the first fifteen minutes.
    These two statements achieve a special anti-synergy. I would lay long odds that there was exactly one player, you, that noticed that you hadn't played a hand.Personally, I can only pay attention to that if I am single-tabling, and I only do that late in tournaments, on the bubble, when I really need to, y'know?If I'm on 4,3, even 2 tables, I usually can't keep up with who does what if I'm not in a hand. Maybe that's just me, though. I only recently started multitabling regularly.Mensch

    how much of himself did mike matasow own???

    in General Poker Forum

    Posted

    Wow, when did everyone start warming up to Smash around here?
    There's a lot of us around now that only found FCP maybe a thousand smashposts ago. We've repeatedly seen him (her?) present logic and credibility in arguments with ignorant asshats who hate him(her?) for being so darned right all the time. Whatever Smash did before that to earn the troublemaker image we've not seen, nor do I for one especially care.Maybe this sounds like forum fellatio (cunnilingus?), but -ahem- SMASHAROO IS MY HERO(ine?)If I'm wrong about the feminine, i apologize, but I gotta wonder about a cat-obsessed romance novelist :wink: Mensch
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