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The Machine

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Posts posted by The Machine

  1. Looked around Vine for the first time last night. Goodness there is a lot of people jerking off on there. And a lot of couples banging.


    The internet, huh?


    Whatever thing that exists on the internet also exists in naked form.


    Instagram, Vine, Twitter...everything can be used for porn.


    We truly live in a glorious age.

  2. Zumba.


    Which of these movies have you seen?


    12 Years a Slave, American Hustle, Inside Llewyn Davis, Her, The Wolf of Wall Street, Nebraska.


    Which movie has the best shot at beating 12 Years for the Oscar?


    I'll hang up and listen off air.

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  3. When you see her manufacture a reason to be in a room with a bed in it.


    Have you ever been in a room with a guy with a bed in it and not had sex? Is that like your kryptonite? Seems like a lot of your advice on bedding a girl centers on that key point.



    I like how you turned Ronnie down without blatantly doing so.


    Maybe she just doesn't want the rest of you to think it's a possibility.

  4. Sorry.


    I actually fired up a spreadsheet to make the joke and after entering the names (Napa, IE, Essay, Shake, and Ron, if anyone is wondering) decided that it wasn't worth the hassle.


    There was a time when I would've made the effort, but it is not this day. This day we slack!

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